I'm Struggling....

[DaisyMamma]

If I were you I would try to find some of the plastic diaper covers on freecycle.org. If not, maybe you can buy them, they are only about $6 for 2. They can be washed and you can save them for future issues such as this one.

It's a tough situation, but really, any other daycare wouldn't put up with it, so there is no reason you should. If it were me I would insist on the diapers and not accept the child into care without them. You should not have to clean that up everyday, no way.

[renodeb]

I understand that budgets are tight but good gried. you cant expect the child to not have anything to drink for that long. Maybe try serving 1/2 of a cup with lunch instead of a whole, if he goes potty then have him try going potty a couple of times before nap time. I also havein my contract that if I need to buy any of the requested items the parent will be billed for them. I would recommend adding that to your contract. Its very helpful. I love all of the suggestions given on this thread. The bottom line is that the child will start staying dry when his body is ready and mature enough. I would love to hear how this one pans out.
Deb

[My3cents]

Yeah, I agree. I already gave them quite a HUGE break on care for the remainder of the summer for their two school-age kids. Honestly, though, around here a diaper a day CAN kill some people's budget. I live in a very depressed area. Very low income area. It's sometimes hard to know just what to do.

yes for a small amount of people yes I am sure that is the case, but having kids should mean that you put your needs 2nd to theirs. I bet they can afford a cell phone,eat out, all the extras...... it is not your problem to take on. You can't do your job effectively if you don't have what you need. The cost should not be handed down to you. If they really can't afford it, direct them to where they can get help for those needs.

Why would you cut your families income and give a huge break? Maybe you can afford to do that, I know most of us here can't that is why we are working long hours for low pay as it is. We work to better our family structures. I am all for helping other people but you have to be in a good place yourself before you can extend that hand out, other wise your paddling the wrong way in the river.

Best

[Countrygal]

yes for a small amount of people yes I am sure that is the case, but having kids should mean that you put your needs 2nd to theirs. I bet they can afford a cell phone,eat out, all the extras...... it is not your problem to take on. You can't do your job effectively if you don't have what you need. The cost should not be handed down to you. If they really can't afford it, direct them to where they can get help for those needs.

Why would you cut your families income and give a huge break? Maybe you can afford to do that, I know most of us here can't that is why we are working long hours for low pay as it is. We work to better our family structures. I am all for helping other people but you have to be in a good place yourself before you can extend that hand out, other wise your paddling the wrong way in the river.

Best

Believe me, my income is extremely low! I'd compare income with anyone here.....and I'd probably come out very near the bottom. My reasons for giving them a break included that I had 2 positions open and there are only 2 1/2 weeks of summer left. I would rather have children than be almost empty. (I can only accept 3 children) At that time they told me he WAS pt, even at naps. I specifically asked. Obviously they stretched the truth. What you say about helping people is very true. I can't help unless I am taking care of myself. But in this case, the money I got for the almost three weeks of care was better than $0. I am also learning as I go. I did dc years ago and things were very much different. I'm learning all of this as I go. Back in those days you worked together with the parents. I am finding out that this is no longer true, for many parents. I'm finding out the hard way..... UGH!

[texascare]

Is he even potty trained or does he wet just at nap? I would call a meeting with the parents and they had better make the time for it as this is their child. You need to discuss this with them. Maybe even tell them that you can not let him sit in the wet clothes at nap due to state policy....kinda a little white lie? But I feel it is wrong what they are doing to their child. imo......If they won't meet then send a letter home with BOTH parents stating that you require diapers by a certain date or the services are terminated due to "lack of parental support"......

This isn't right to not allow him to have liquids and it is unsanitary for your home for the wetting the bed issue. This is your home and you know whats best. Your rules as well.

[Blackcat31]

Personally Country what I would do is offer the parent TWO options:

1: Bring pull-ups and/or diapers for nap time OR
2: Pick up child every day at nap time and return him after nap is over.


I do not get into any type of back and forth debates with parents. I know what I will and won't put up with, when and how far I will bend but I will NEVER allow a parent to tell me how to run my business and I am in the business of caring for kids based on THEIR needs NOT the parents.


I guess a 3rd option would be to have them see their pediatrician and have him give you a detailed note stating EXACTLY when and how much liquid the DCB should have. I highly doubt they will be able to convince their pediatrician to give written permission for the child to be purposely dehydrated.

[Crazy8]

diapers cost about 30 cents each (and that's name brand diapers!). Really, no matter what they are going thru now, having a child means dealing with the responsibility of the costs involved and this child is NOT potty trained enough to not wet while sleeping. I'm sure they can afford the diaper they put on him at night because otherwise that means a soaked mattress/sheets for them in the morning. Funny how when it inconveniences the parent they find a way. They need to bring you one diaper every day or the child doesn't stay. Can't believe they want this child to go HOURS without a drink - especially in the summer??? That is insane!

[Countrygal]

I guess a 3rd option would be to have them see their pediatrician and have him give you a detailed note stating EXACTLY when and how much liquid the DCB should have. I highly doubt they will be able to convince their pediatrician to give written permission for the child to be purposely dehydrated.

That made me chuckle - not because it is funny, but because the same exact idea came into my head today!!!

I wish I was as sure and confident as you are, BC. Maybe some day I'll get there...... I am certainly working on it! And this forum helps a LOT!

[Blackcat31]

That made me chuckle - not because it is funny, but because the same exact idea came into my head today!!!

I wish I was as sure and confident as you are, BC. Maybe some day I'll get there...... I am certainly working on it! And this forum helps a LOT!

Ya wanna know the secret? I'll tell you.....

My grandmother once told me "Too many people let other people define them."

That stuck with me because it is so very true.

Stop and take a moment and really think about each daycare family that you have (not the kids but the parents) and ask yourself......what do they REALLY mean to you?

What do they do for you...as in, do they make you a better person? Are they in charge of whether or not you have a good life or if you are a good person or a good wife/mother/daycare provider?

Who are they really to decide WHO you are?

No one. That's who. They have no bearing on whether you are a good person. YOU make you who you are not them or anyone else. YOU need to do what makes YOU happy and you can't complain about whether your life is good or bad because only YOU are in charge of that one life you have.

YOU teach people how to treat you, YOU can either let them treat you like dirt or you can speak up and say "Hey!, that is NOT ok with me"! YOU only get one life and it really is up to YOU to do with it what you will.

Don't let anyone (and I mean NO ONE) define who you are. EVER.

It takes some practice but there really is a way to get the things you want and be some what strict but still be friendly, understanding and supportive. Knowing the boundaries of these things is key.

Draw your line and stand by it. People WILL respect you more for having those boundaries and the backbone to enforce them alot more than they would if you just let them walk all over you.

If you ever need ANYTHING, you are always welcome to PM me. or PM me and I will send you my e-mail address if that is easier....I am pretty good at pep talks when needed.

[MarinaVanessa]

Just a thought, you are "required" to serve milk at lunch so I am assuming that this is a regulation?? Im on the food program and we have that new regulation about what type of drinks to serve and on top of the whole "must serve milk at lunch, no sugary drinks" thing we are also required to have water "readily available". This means that any time that the child is thirsty they need to be served water. Do you have this regulation? If so then you could always use this as your excuse for not being able to restrict his liquid intake. This way you can really press more on the sleep diaper thing.

Also if dad doesn't have time to chat write him his own note as well. Lastly, mom hasn't turned in her signed contract?? Easy fix, mom can't pick up or drop off until it's turned in. I NEVER allow a child to start until all required paperwork is turned in.

Good luck. KUP.

[Countrygal]

Thanks, BC. You are sooooooo right. I have an INFJ personality profile. Conflict goes against my grain. Resolutions are my game. I'm called the "giver" or the "adaptor" or even the "fixer". I should be in social work, but I knew I would never be hard enough. I can always see both sides of a situation and usually can empathize. It makes this part of the business soooo hard. But I know everything you said is right and true. Sometimes it is hard for me to compromise my personality with reality. I'm workin' on it!!!! And thanks for the offer! You'll prolly be sorry you made it!

Ya wanna know the secret? I'll tell you.....

My grandmother once told me "Too many people let other people define them."

That stuck with me because it is so very true.

Stop and take a moment and really think about each daycare family that you have (not the kids but the parents) and ask yourself......what do they REALLY mean to you?

What do they do for you...as in, do they make you a better person? Are they in charge of whether or not you have a good life or if you are a good person or a good wife/mother/daycare provider?

Who are they really to decide WHO you are?

No one. That's who. They have no bearing on whether you are a good person. YOU make you who you are not them or anyone else. YOU need to do what makes YOU happy and you can't complain about whether your life is good or bad because only YOU are in charge of that one life you have.

YOU teach people how to treat you, YOU can either let them treat you like dirt or you can speak up and say "Hey!, that is NOT ok with me"! YOU only get one life and it really is up to YOU to do with it what you will.

Don't let anyone (and I mean NO ONE) define who you are. EVER.

It takes some practice but there really is a way to get the things you want and be some what strict but still be friendly, understanding and supportive. Knowing the boundaries of these things is key.

Draw your line and stand by it. People WILL respect you more for having those boundaries and the backbone to enforce them alot more than they would if you just let them walk all over you.

If you ever need ANYTHING, you are always welcome to PM me. or PM me and I will send you my e-mail address if that is easier....I am pretty good at pep talks when needed.

[ritah]

Ya wanna know the secret? I'll tell you.....

My grandmother once told me "Too many people let other people define them."

That stuck with me because it is so very true.

Stop and take a moment and really think about each daycare family that you have (not the kids but the parents) and ask yourself......what do they REALLY mean to you?

What do they do for you...as in, do they make you a better person? Are they in charge of whether or not you have a good life or if you are a good person or a good wife/mother/daycare provider?

Who are they really to decide WHO you are?

No one. That's who. They have no bearing on whether you are a good person. YOU make you who you are not them or anyone else. YOU need to do what makes YOU happy and you can't complain about whether your life is good or bad because only YOU are in charge of that one life you have.

YOU teach people how to treat you, YOU can either let them treat you like dirt or you can speak up and say "Hey!, that is NOT ok with me"! YOU only get one life and it really is up to YOU to do with it what you will.

Don't let anyone (and I mean NO ONE) define who you are. EVER.

It takes some practice but there really is a way to get the things you want and be some what strict but still be friendly, understanding and supportive. Knowing the boundaries of these things is key.

Draw your line and stand by it. People WILL respect you more for having those boundaries and the backbone to enforce them alot more than they would if you just let them walk all over you.

If you ever need ANYTHING, you are always welcome to PM me. or PM me and I will send you my e-mail address if that is easier....I am pretty good at pep talks when needed.

[Countrygal]

Just a thought, you are "required" to serve milk at lunch so I am assuming that this is a regulation?? Im on the food program and we have that new regulation about what type of drinks to serve and on top of the whole "must serve milk at lunch, no sugary drinks" thing we are also required to have water "readily available". This means that any time that the child is thirsty they need to be served water. Do you have this regulation? If so then you could always use this as your excuse for not being able to restrict his liquid intake. This way you can really press more on the sleep diaper thing.

Also if dad doesn't have time to chat write him his own note as well. Lastly, mom hasn't turned in her signed contract?? Easy fix, mom can't pick up or drop off until it's turned in. I NEVER allow a child to start until all required paperwork is turned in.

Good luck. KUP.

Oh, I might have that requirement! I never thought of that !!! Thanks!!! I actually sat down and wrote a note today and included a copy for each parent. I am demanding the signed paperwork by Monday, or don't come...... Along with diapers. Now, I'll be the one shaking while giving it to him!!! ROFL!!!

[Heidi]

Oh, I might have that requirement! I never thought of that !!! Thanks!!! I actually sat down and wrote a note today and included a copy for each parent. I am demanding the signed paperwork by Monday, or don't come...... Along with diapers. Now, I'll be the one shaking while giving it to him!!! ROFL!!!

Great way to handle it! Now you don't have to terminate. They either comply, or they don't show up. You put the ball in your court. Now, lay off the fine coffee for the next couple hours!

[Countrygal]

Great way to handle it! Now you don't have to terminate. They either comply, or they don't show up. You put the ball in your court. Now, lay off the fine coffee for the next couple hours!

The sad part is I haven't had a single drop of caffeine all day..... I might as well be enjoying this stress!!!