Problem Child

**Blackcat31** · 08-15-2012, 06:23 AM

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**Bookworm** · 08-15-2012, 05:48 PM

Originally posted by mizmelzy

I'm new to the board, and just joined. I work in a day care center with 50+ kids. During the summer I'm a floater and work with all the kids. During the school year I work in the 4K classroom.

There is one kid that will be coming into the 4K class this year that is some what of a problem child. He has been at the day care since he was a baby. He does not want to listen at all. If you tell him to sit down, he'll run around the room and do everything but. I've tried putting him in time out, and he doesn't stay there. He feels that he doesn't have to listen to anyone and he can do what he wants. I usually send him to the director when he won't listen to me. She'll talk to him, and maybe for a day he'll be somewhat better. But it never lasts. I've tried a reward system. Let him pick out a sticker he likes and he gets it at the end of the day. However, this system has failed as well. Once he knows he's lost the sticker he doesn't care and will go back to not listening. I know that many of the daycare staff have talked to mom, and grandma (mom lives with grandma). And nothing seems to be working.

I need to find a solution because other kids are seeing him act this way and they think if he can act that way so can they.

Just wondering if someone has any other ideas I may try?

~Mel~

I've been through this with a different child every year so you have my deepest sympathies. What does Mom/Grandma say/do when told about his behavior? Do they blow you off or are they trying to work with you? There are some children that will respond to positive reinforcement. And then there is your DCB. What I do is tell the parents, after the third incident of the day, that Johnny is having a challenge with his hands and I think he may have left his Listening Ears at home. I ask how do you discipline Johnny at home when he behaves this way? The answers vary from "We talk about it and he promises to listen tomorrow" to Johnny apologizing and the loss of privileges.

It sounds like your DCB's parents are the "talk about" kind. If that is the case, then he needs to be your second shadow. Try using a large hula hoop and sit him in it with toys or whatnot to play with. Sit near him to make sure he doesn't run off. Explain why he has to sit alone and be consistent.

One more thing, get yourself a good "stink eye". I have an excellent one (got mine from my Grandma). This has given me the ability to just look at them and they straighten up. Here's a hug and good luck.

**mizmelzy** · 01-12-2013, 09:57 AM

We do talk to mom and grandma. Already had one parent teacher conference for the year and another one coming up. Mom talks to the teacher and wants to help and find a solution. Though she often comments that he is acting the way she did when she was young. They try taking toys away for bad behavior, not watching tv etc. And they are at a loss at what to do with his behavior as well. Now that he's in the P4J (4K) he adjusts some, but there are days when he has a very bad day even before getting to the afternoon 4K. So he then takes a nap and that sometimes helps.

Lately I've noticed while playing out side his very rough. He'll walk on picnic tables (kids size) and jump off of them, or push toys over and walk on them (as they wabble). There's a little tikes ship that they can go in and hang from. He'll climb on top of it, even if I've told him stay off. I usually after the first offence give no warning and he gets a time out. He can only get 1 minute per year of his age which is 4 minutes. But I add time that then gets taken off of play time. He's usually not happy with that.

He's basically a good kid, but he has a really hard time sitting still and listening. The odd thing is during group time he could be running around or playing with something and you think he's not listening, but he is. I've talked to the 4k Teacher that I work with and told her to have someone from the district observe him. She said that they can't do anything to diagnose a child for any disability of any kind until at least kindergarten.

My thought may be to do a daily behavior note that goes home and mom or grandma because he lives with her must sign it and return it to us. Not sure if that would work if on a daily basis they had a report of his day. They already do note books at the daycare where they tell the parents what the child did that day etc. But that's for the day care and they are written during naptime and that's when he's in the 4K class. So it doesn't reflect what he does there. Just wondering if a daily report might help??

I watched the dvd of 1,2,3 magic but the suggestions don't really work for him.

So I'm looking for other ideas that might get him to sit sitll, listen and behave.

Thanks!
Melissa

**Holiday Park** · 01-12-2013, 10:36 AM

Personally I would ask dcm about what he is eating at home. Artificial sweeteners/colorings/preservatives /dairy (even gluten for some peope) and not eating enough fresh foods can make it hard to concentrate and focus making it seem like the person has adhd or something. If he is eating better and getting more sleep he may FEEL better and be able to think more clearly. Not sure that is something you can look into as far as his eating/nutrition &sleeping habits.

**mizmelzy** · 01-12-2013, 11:08 AM

I can check with the parents on what he is eating at home. I know that mom is living with grandma because of low income so it might be what they can afford. But will talk to them about it. Parent teacher conferences are coming up. I've also kept an observation log for him. That I can also let the parents see as well.

Melissa

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