finally got a backbone

[Unregistered]

I'm logged out for privacy today.

Just wanted to say thank you to all of you who gave me the confidence to assert myself with a parent. It was incredibly difficult for me, and I still feel sick to my stomach, but I did it, and now I won't be losing 12 days pay.

This family was given an exception to my must-pay-for-vacations policy (my first mistake) and is allowed to take summers off unpaid. Then, this year, they suddenly decided they'd be coming during August, which meant I turned away other families who wanted to use the space. Then August rolls around, and he doesn't show up. Now they tell me they're not coming back until September. (Second mistake: I hadn't put their plan into a written contract, just onto my calendar.) Oh, it got ugly. But in the end, they're paying me. And next year's contract is going to be much more specific. Ick.

Just wanted to share with someone who'd get it.

[Annalee]

Way to go!!!! happyface

[Blackcat31]

I'm logged out for privacy today.

Just wanted to say thank you to all of you who gave me the confidence to assert myself with a parent. It was incredibly difficult for me, and I still feel sick to my stomach, but I did it, and now I won't be losing 12 days pay.

This family was given an exception to my must-pay-for-vacations policy (my first mistake) and is allowed to take summers off unpaid. Then, this year, they suddenly decided they'd be coming during August, which meant I turned away other families who wanted to use the space. Then August rolls around, and he doesn't show up. Now they tell me they're not coming back until September. (Second mistake: I hadn't put their plan into a written contract, just onto my calendar.) Oh, it got ugly. But in the end, they're paying me. And next year's contract is going to be much more specific. Ick.

Just wanted to share with someone who'd get it.

Good for you! Sometimes it takes getting walked on or having your nice-ness abused for you to find a way to use that backbone

I have always been appreciative of my "Golden" families and have no problem being flexible but even golden families will turn on you if they feel it is no longer working for them.

Always do what works for YOU and expect families to do the same when push comes to shove. Not saying that in anyway towards parents (or providers) but if you are honest about your needs and what will and won't work for you, it will always be ok.

I am also very careful to explain to parents when I make a change or exception, that just because I may be accomodating at this moment, doesn't always mean it will always work in the future.

Either way, good for you! Sometimes asserting oursleves can be the hardest thing we have ever had to do.

[Meyou]

Congrats!

[Unregistered]

Good for you! Sometimes it takes getting walked on or having your nice-ness abused for you to find a way to use that backbone

Exactly!

I have always been appreciative of my "Golden" families and have no problem being flexible but even golden families will turn on you if they feel it is no longer working for them.

Always do what works for YOU and expect families to do the same when push comes to shove. Not saying that in anyway towards parents (or providers) but if you are honest about your needs and what will and won't work for you, it will always be ok.

I am also very careful to explain to parents when I make a change or exception, that just because I may be accomodating at this moment, doesn't always mean it will always work in the future.

That's very good advice. I'll keep working on my backbone and plan to do this in the future!

Either way, good for you! Sometimes asserting oursleves can be the hardest thing we have ever had to do.

That's for sure! Thanks.

[Unregistered]

Thanks so much for the support. I'm so glad I joined this forum.

[My3cents]

Thanks so much for the support. I'm so glad I joined this forum.

Welcome!

You will learn a ton here.

Backbone is hard for almost everyone. I don't think anyone here will say that they have not had a hard time with this at one point or another.

I suggest highly that you put together a packet for your parents. Contract, Rules,policy,handbook and other papers you will need to have parents sign. Make sure in future that you are paid no matter if the child comes or not. You are working no matter if they decide to bring the child or keep the child at home, the child is also taking up a spot. Unless you have a spot open for drop in care and you want to charge only when the child comes, I suggest you charge no matter if they are at care or not. You need to be able to depend upon an income. Teachers are paid year round, they might chose to take that money during the year and not be paid during the summer months, but they are paid, you should be too!

Best-