Time of Year/Burnout?

**SunshineMama** · 07-25-2012, 01:33 PM

Originally posted by Country Kids

MMMmmm some of the thread that are being written write now have me thinking is it just "That time of Year" or is it burnout.

Daves thread-everyone having it better then others

Logged out-I'm in a funk

Mine-Family/daycare

What I see is there is alot of people posting on them pretty much agreeing with the op. Either they feel that way or have been there.

I'm thinking if childcare takes that much of a toll on us mentally and physically, why do we stay with it. Especially after we have older kids or kids out of the house?

I am with it until my youngest goes to kindergarten, or until my husband makes enough money for me to quit. This job takes a lot out of you!

**Blackcat31** · 07-25-2012, 01:45 PM

Sorry it's so long.....

I don't neccessarily know the answers but I do know what works for me and I am one of those providers who have kids who are grown and gone. I am in this for the long haul so doing this just so I can be home with my own kids was and has never been it for me.

I think WHY you are doing this has a profound affect on things like burn out, frustrations, stressors and such....kwim? If you do this simply to stay home and raise your own, then I can see how it didn't or isn't quite working out to be all fun and games and live up to that ideal fantasy of being a SAHM with an income. It is work and can be tiresome and cause burnout.....which it does. There really is no way to happily stay home with your kids while doing daycare unless you have a clear idea of what being a provider really means.

I am doing this because I want to do it as a career. I knew FULLY what I was getting into as I had worked in the field prior to starting my own family child care. I have career goals to work towards and am not simply trying to make it until my youngest goes to school or just survive on the income because putting my own kids in care would cost too much. I was not blinded by any of that.

I have my ups and downs too and have had periods of "What was I thinking" but for me I also have the type of personality that I focus on what I can change and leave the rest to my faith (or whoever or whatever you believe in). I know when this life is done and over with, that I did make a difference and even if I didn't change the world, I change one person's life. Whether that is a child's or a daycare parents or a friend (virtual and real) but no matter what I had a purpose and I lived up to that.

Yes, doing child care DOES take a toll on us physically, emotionally and mentally but again, I apply the "what CAN I change" concept to it and do the things that I know will help me be the healthiest I can be physically, mentally and emotionally. I try not to stress too much about the things I can't change because I can't change them. I also make a conscious effort to never allow someone else's issues be my issues. If they effect me, then they are my issues too but if they don't, I have learned to let others solve and deal with their own. If they ask for help, advice or input, I will gladly give it but won't solve it or do it for them....just like kids......we help, assist, prod, motivate, support and encourage but we don't do it for them.

I also think that how people deal with the stuff life throws at them depends on the type of person they are in the first place. Some people have a strong sense of who they are and are confident in what they do and others seek approval or assistance from others before taking any type of steps in whatever direction. I personally had some major tragedies occur in my life and after that I decided that this is MY life and it is only going to be what I make of it.

No one is going to do it for me and no one is going to make sure I do it. We are lucky that every minute we are alive, that it is an opportunity to grow and learn and when we make mistakes, we should learn from them and when we do things right, we should celebrate. When we are feeling low, we should figure out what makes us happy and then do it......it surely isn't going to come to you or simply fall on your doorstep. The best things in life are the things we worked really hard for and therefore really appreciate.

“Your life is your own. Rise up and live it.”
― Terry Goodkind, Faith of the Fallen

**Crazy8** · 07-25-2012, 02:15 PM

for me its time of year... and I think it is because my kids are getting a little older, making being home with a full load of daycare kids all summer hard. I lovethis my job during the school year and I know I will again come September (if I can get some kids in here, LOL) but this has just been my most challenging summer because my kids are more independent and want to go out and do things like the beach, water park, etc. but I can't. Doesn't help that 90% of my friends/neighbors are SAHM's who are going out doing all those things and the other 10% have much more flexible jobs where they have days off during the week.

**Country Kids** · 07-25-2012, 02:36 PM

Originally posted by Crazy8

for me its time of year... and I think it is because my kids are getting a little older, making being home with a full load of daycare kids all summer hard. I lovethis my job during the school year and I know I will again come September (if I can get some kids in here, LOL) but this has just been my most challenging summer because my kids are more independent and want to go out and do things like the beach, water park, etc. but I can't. Doesn't help that 90% of my friends/neighbors are SAHM's who are going out doing all those things and the other 10% have much more flexible jobs where they have days off during the week.

This exactly!!! Thank you for finding my words on this! I'm staying home for my kids but we can't do anything because of the childcare. I have parents that have so much time off throughout the year and just seem to take random days off. I have several teachers that of course have summers off and all school breaks, then a couple others have like 4 weeks, then another has 2 weeks, all holidays, and then persontime and sick time.

Then the weekends are spent trying to catch everything up that we didn't do through the week which leaves no time for fun.

Trying to have a positive outlook-

but sometimes its sooooo hard-

**daycarediva** · 07-25-2012, 02:55 PM

It's time of year for me. I realized that I am done mixing age groups and this will be my last summer doing SA care. I am in this for life. With my youngest ds going into prek in the fall, I could work part time and stop doing daycare. I found myself reallllyyyy sad about that decision. I genuinely like my job (98% of the time) and enjoy the kids and the time I spend with them.

**Nickel** · 07-25-2012, 02:59 PM

Originally posted by Blackcat31

I don't neccessarily know the answers but I do know what works for me and I am one of those providers who have kids who are grown and gone. I am in this for the long haul so doing this just so I can be home with my own kids was and has never been it for me.

I think WHY you are doing this has a profound affect on things like burn out, frustrations, stressors and such....kwim? If you do this simply to stay home and raise your own, then I can see how it didn't or isn't quite working out to be all fun and games and live up to that ideal fantasy of being a SAHM with an income. It is work and can be tiresome and cause burnout.....which it does. There really is no way to happily stay home with your kids while doing daycare unless you have a clear idea of what being a provider really means.

I am doing this because I want to do it as a career. I knew FULLY what I was getting into as I had worked in the field prior to starting my own family child care. I have career goals to work towards and am not simply trying to make it until my youngest goes to school or just survive on the income because putting my own kids in care would cost too much. I was not blinded by any of that.

I have my ups and downs too and have had periods of "What was I thinking" but for me I also have the type of personality that I focus on what I can change and leave the rest to my faith (or whoever or whatever you believe in). I know when this life is done and over with, that I did make a difference and even if I didn't change the world, I change one person's life. Whether that is a child's or a daycare parents or a friend (virtual and real) but no matter what I had a purpose and I lived up to that.

Yes, doing child care DOES take a toll on us physically, emotionally and mentally but again, I apply the "what CAN I change" concept to it and do the things that I know will help me be the healthiest I can be physically, mentally and emotionally. I try not to stress too much about the things I can't change because I can't change them. I also make a conscious effort to never allow someone else's issues be my issues. If they effect me, then they are my issues too but if they don't, I have learned to let others solve and deal with their own. If they ask for help, advice or input, I will gladly give it but won't solve it or do it for them....just like kids......we help, assist, prod, motivate, support and encourage but we don't do it for them.

I also think that how people deal with the stuff life throws at them depends on the type of person they are in the first place. Some people have a strong sense of who they are and are confident in what they do and others seek approval or assistance from others before taking any type of steps in whatever direction. I personally had some major tragedies occur in my life and after that I decided that this is MY life and it is only going to be what I make of it.

No one is going to do it for me and no one is going to make sure I do it. We are lucky that every minute we are alive, that it is an opportunity to grow and learn and when we make mistakes, we should learn from them and when we do things right, we should celebrate. When we are feeling low, we should figure out what makes us happy and then do it......it surely isn't going to come to you or simply fall on your doorstep. The best things in life are the things we worked really hard for and therefore really appreciate.

“Your life is your own. Rise up and live it.”
― Terry Goodkind, Faith of the Fallen

Very motivational Blackcat! And so true. Sometimes i forget that and need a boot in my butt!!!

As for me I am starting home childcare because I don't want to miss out being with my little one, I can't find a quality child care situation in my area and I want to provide quality care for other children. I know that it is a full time job and being home still means I am working. And honestly, I don't want to work outside my home. When my oldest was born I was an active duty Marine working 6am-6pm mon-fri and some weekends and overnights. After that I worked as a waitress 10pm-6am while still being a mom. After my husband and I got married (and several jobs later) I was able to get a job with the fed govt. But I was driving an hour one way to work and working 8-4 So I still missed out on so much. When my youngest was born I was a sahm, and then decided to go back to school where I ran into my current situation.

So, I think you're right Blackcat.

But I can also see having a job you love most of the time, but that you sometimes wish you didn't have the responsibilities. It's like when the weather warms up in spring after a long hard winter and you sooo wish you were outside and having fun instead of chained at your desk staring at the computer screen... Every job has it's ups and downs but I can see how certain times of the year cause people to feel like they are missing out.

I mean who really complains about work in the middle of winter, except for the ones that have to scrape off their windshields and freeze their butts of waiting for the car to warm up

So I don't think the end of summer blues is restricted to just hdc. I think it's every or at least most jobs when the weather is beautiful and people are having fun...

jmho, but what do i know

**Sugar Magnolia** · 07-25-2012, 06:08 PM

Both, in my opinion. Summer is tough, especially for y'all up north that are not used to the terrible heat you have been having. (comes with the territory down here). I think the Summer Time Blues is a real thing. It wears you down mentally, wears you out physically. For me, burnout is a symptom of "that time of year." I know my steady, full time enrollment has been down, but school-agers and part timers filled some gaps, and that can be stressful for me. Even though I have come to expect that summer cycle, it always gets to me. But my beach is less crowded at least, that helps!:

:

**My3cents** · 07-26-2012, 06:11 AM

Originally posted by Blackcat31

I don't neccessarily know the answers but I do know what works for me and I am one of those providers who have kids who are grown and gone. I am in this for the long haul so doing this just so I can be home with my own kids was and has never been it for me.

I think WHY you are doing this has a profound affect on things like burn out, frustrations, stressors and such....kwim? If you do this simply to stay home and raise your own, then I can see how it didn't or isn't quite working out to be all fun and games and live up to that ideal fantasy of being a SAHM with an income. It is work and can be tiresome and cause burnout.....which it does. There really is no way to happily stay home with your kids while doing daycare unless you have a clear idea of what being a provider really means.

I am doing this because I want to do it as a career. I knew FULLY what I was getting into as I had worked in the field prior to starting my own family child care. I have career goals to work towards and am not simply trying to make it until my youngest goes to school or just survive on the income because putting my own kids in care would cost too much. I was not blinded by any of that.

I have my ups and downs too and have had periods of "What was I thinking" but for me I also have the type of personality that I focus on what I can change and leave the rest to my faith (or whoever or whatever you believe in). I know when this life is done and over with, that I did make a difference and even if I didn't change the world, I change one person's life. Whether that is a child's or a daycare parents or a friend (virtual and real) but no matter what I had a purpose and I lived up to that.

Yes, doing child care DOES take a toll on us physically, emotionally and mentally but again, I apply the "what CAN I change" concept to it and do the things that I know will help me be the healthiest I can be physically, mentally and emotionally. I try not to stress too much about the things I can't change because I can't change them. I also make a conscious effort to never allow someone else's issues be my issues. If they effect me, then they are my issues too but if they don't, I have learned to let others solve and deal with their own. If they ask for help, advice or input, I will gladly give it but won't solve it or do it for them....just like kids......we help, assist, prod, motivate, support and encourage but we don't do it for them.

I also think that how people deal with the stuff life throws at them depends on the type of person they are in the first place. Some people have a strong sense of who they are and are confident in what they do and others seek approval or assistance from others before taking any type of steps in whatever direction. I personally had some major tragedies occur in my life and after that I decided that this is MY life and it is only going to be what I make of it.

No one is going to do it for me and no one is going to make sure I do it. We are lucky that every minute we are alive, that it is an opportunity to grow and learn and when we make mistakes, we should learn from them and when we do things right, we should celebrate. When we are feeling low, we should figure out what makes us happy and then do it......it surely isn't going to come to you or simply fall on your doorstep. The best things in life are the things we worked really hard for and therefore really appreciate.

“Your life is your own. Rise up and live it.”
― Terry Goodkind, Faith of the Fallen

I could have wrote every bit of this!!! Thanks for posting!

**My3cents** · 07-26-2012, 06:19 AM

neither apply to me.

I am doing this because I want to do it. This is the career that I have chose. I don't need to be a career climber but I do love learning and growing and trying to be the best at what I do. Word for word I could have wrote what Blackcat did.

I will say I have days just like everyone else does- but then I try to see what I can do to improve and make myself happy and not wait for it to fall onto me. I am responsible for my happiness-

**WImom** · 07-26-2012, 06:28 AM

Originally posted by Crazy8

for me its time of year... and I think it is because my kids are getting a little older, making being home with a full load of daycare kids all summer hard. I lovethis my job during the school year and I know I will again come September (if I can get some kids in here, LOL) but this has just been my most challenging summer because my kids are more independent and want to go out and do things like the beach, water park, etc. but I can't. Doesn't help that 90% of my friends/neighbors are SAHM's who are going out doing all those things and the other 10% have much more flexible jobs where they have days off during the week.

Yep, this exactly. I wish I had enough business in the area to do only teachers kids so I could have summers off with my own. I hate that all the other SAHM's in the area are driving my kids to stuff and I'm missing out.

**momma2girls** · 07-26-2012, 06:38 AM

Originally posted by SunshineMama

I am with it until my youngest goes to kindergarten, or until my husband makes enough money for me to quit. This job takes a lot out of you!

I am in the same boat!!

**Kaddidle Care** · 07-26-2012, 06:52 AM

You need a "Both" button! :

:

I had enough after 5 years in a Center. I quit! happyface

**sahm2three** · 07-26-2012, 07:10 AM

For me, I think summers are easier. I think the reason for this is, when my kids are in school, I miss out on so much with their school activities because of work, and it makes me resent my job. I just can't get away, and it makes me sad and I HATE missing out on anything that my kids do. I was a stay at home mom for over 11 years, and I miss it because I was free to attend all my kids day activities, I could help in school, etc. Now, I can't. So for me, the school year is a burn out time for me. Summers are far easier!

**My3cents** · 07-26-2012, 09:59 AM

Originally posted by sahm2three

For me, I think summers are easier. I think the reason for this is, when my kids are in school, I miss out on so much with their school activities because of work, and it makes me resent my job. I just can't get away, and it makes me sad and I HATE missing out on anything that my kids do. I was a stay at home mom for over 11 years, and I miss it because I was free to attend all my kids day activities, I could help in school, etc. Now, I can't. So for me, the school year is a burn out time for me. Summers are far easier!

super easy fix for you- hire some help or get someone to volunteer when you need. Put together a list of what to do and what time to do it and go from there...or close once in a while for the important stuff that you don't want to miss- parents should have back up care

Time of Year/Burnout?

Time of Year/Burnout?

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