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I have a new DKG-4yrs that started two weeks ago and her Dad refuses to let her adjust to being in a center. She has never been in daycare before and was at home with Dad who works nights. Mom felt like it was time for her to be around other children in a learning environment. When they toured, the DCG was so excited about starting. They let her stay for a few minutes while they did paperwork and when they were done she had to carried out kicking and screaming because she wanted to stay.
Flash forward to day 1. Dad brought her in, I went over to greet them and talk to Dad for a minute to reassure him that she will have a great time. DCG turns to tell Dad bye and give him a hug. He hugs her and whispers something in her ear. Cue a 45 minute meltdown screaming to the top of her lung begging him not to leave her here. Finally between me and my Director literally taking her into the class, he leaves. I get her calmed down and we start talking about the days activities. 30 minutes later Dad is back. He never left. He sat in the office all that time watching her on camera. So I just happen to look up and see him standing in the door whispering her name. I went over to him and asked if he needed anything he said no he was taking her home because she wasn't having fun. I told him that she hasn't been here long enough to have fun and asked that he let her stay until after nap. He said no because he didn't feel that she liked it. I said ok packed up DCG things and walked her to her Dad.
Over the next week, she would come one day then miss one. Dad then told us that she will now be part-time to help her adjust. We tried to explain that PT children take longer to adjust because they are not here as much. Then he changed his mind and said she will be a drop-in. Now during the time she has been coming, we've had several fun activities: water day, ice cream man, pizza on a stick etc. He refused to let her participate in any of it even though she knew about them and wanted to participate. She cried every time. I felt especially bad about the ice cream man. I ended up buying her one and saving for the next day.
I have never seen this before in my life. Most parents eventually get over it and move on, but he is doing this on purpose. This not helping her at all. My Director tried and tried to talk to Mom/Dad about this but it goes in one ear and out the other. Mom claims she wants her FT but she can't go against Dad. I am at a loss here. We joked at work saying this is the first time we've begged for a child to come to school. Other than the adjustment issues, is there any other way to appeal to them. Watching that DKG cry when she has to leave is killing me. Sorry for the length but I have been trying to write this for three days because I couldn't get my thoughts straight. Thanks for your advice.
Flash forward to day 1. Dad brought her in, I went over to greet them and talk to Dad for a minute to reassure him that she will have a great time. DCG turns to tell Dad bye and give him a hug. He hugs her and whispers something in her ear. Cue a 45 minute meltdown screaming to the top of her lung begging him not to leave her here. Finally between me and my Director literally taking her into the class, he leaves. I get her calmed down and we start talking about the days activities. 30 minutes later Dad is back. He never left. He sat in the office all that time watching her on camera. So I just happen to look up and see him standing in the door whispering her name. I went over to him and asked if he needed anything he said no he was taking her home because she wasn't having fun. I told him that she hasn't been here long enough to have fun and asked that he let her stay until after nap. He said no because he didn't feel that she liked it. I said ok packed up DCG things and walked her to her Dad.
Over the next week, she would come one day then miss one. Dad then told us that she will now be part-time to help her adjust. We tried to explain that PT children take longer to adjust because they are not here as much. Then he changed his mind and said she will be a drop-in. Now during the time she has been coming, we've had several fun activities: water day, ice cream man, pizza on a stick etc. He refused to let her participate in any of it even though she knew about them and wanted to participate. She cried every time. I felt especially bad about the ice cream man. I ended up buying her one and saving for the next day.
I have never seen this before in my life. Most parents eventually get over it and move on, but he is doing this on purpose. This not helping her at all. My Director tried and tried to talk to Mom/Dad about this but it goes in one ear and out the other. Mom claims she wants her FT but she can't go against Dad. I am at a loss here. We joked at work saying this is the first time we've begged for a child to come to school. Other than the adjustment issues, is there any other way to appeal to them. Watching that DKG cry when she has to leave is killing me. Sorry for the length but I have been trying to write this for three days because I couldn't get my thoughts straight. Thanks for your advice.
: (fwiw~ he was/is the spoiled child in the family)
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