Miserable Summer with 6 SAC's

[providerandmomof4]

Today I felt like crying when my SAC's left. They all leave fairly early so that's a bonus but I was so excited about having all older children this summer. Now I'm so depressed and after 6 wks, I feel like a failure. All day long the kids were fighting, didn't want to do the art projects I had planned. Every activity I tried, they would complain and the 3 boys are constantly hitting each other or rowdying. I feel like I spend my days here lately,(oh yea..the honeymoon phase is over) breaking up fights or keeping them from destroying my house. I never yell and today I yelled at one dcg for standing on the hand rail on my stairs. Not only is it dangerous, but has very intricate glass tile that could easily be broken. I sound like a broken record, even to myself. "Please keep your hands to yourself," or "please stop throwing pillows, stuffed animals, etc." I mean it's non-stop. If I don't have something for them to do every second, and I have to be doing it with them, they are tearing the house apart. They are so disrespectful too. I tried to separate one dcg today for hitting and she just got up and got some toys and began playing. The power struggle ensued! I don't know what to do! I'm miserable!

[EchoMom]

I wish I could be of help, I'm so sorry. That's terrible, they sound like rotten kids!!! I have 2 SA and they've been a delight to have. I'm so sorry, at least you can count down and know it won't last forever right???

I would say you need to go on serious lockdown mode and if any kids complain to their parents who complain to you you just tell them, the kids have gotten out of hand and so have lost privledges and are earning them back and practicing safety and respect.

As a former classroom teacher of 3rd graders and also Kindergarteners I'm telling you, you have to shut it down! They can't even move without permission. Are you being to lenient? Giving them too much freedom and choice they haven't earned??? The best advice I can give you is to take everything away, and tell them you can do this art project or sit on this couch. Then, kick them out of the activity and back to the couch if they are out of line. Eventually they'll be bored enough and someone will start to come around. When one of the kids starts to act better then do activities and stuff with just that one and let the others just sit and watch. Eventually they'll get it, but you have to take everything away. Sounds harsh I know.

The trouble is, you have them for such a short time, by the time they start to act great for you, they'll be back to school!

[Hunni Bee]

As a former classroom teacher of 3rd graders and also Kindergarteners I'm telling you, you have to shut it down! They can't even move without permission. Are you being to lenient? Giving them too much freedom and choice they haven't earned??? The best advice I can give you is to take everything away, and tell them you can do this art project or sit on this couch. Then, kick them out of the activity and back to the couch if they are out of line. Eventually they'll be bored enough and someone will start to come around. When one of the kids starts to act better then do activities and stuff with just that one and let the others just sit and watch. Eventually they'll get it, but you have to take everything away. Sounds harsh I know.

The trouble is, you have them for such a short time, by the time they start to act great for you, they'll be back to school!

I agree 100%. If they want to act like toddlers, then treat them as such til they get it.

[DaisyMamma]

I am not a big fan of SA. They are really roudy.
I am lucky to live on a lake and we spend a considerable amount of time on our beach everyday. The SA rarely get bored there. They just swim and play all day. If we were home it would be terrible, just as you describe.
Is there any local place you can bring them to blow off steam?
I think you do need to lay down the law, be VERY strict and let them know that crazy house is over. Hopefully it will help. It's amazing how much more work the older ones are. Hang in there!

[BumbleBee]

Sometimes I feel like school-agers take more work and supervision than the younger ones. I would be very very strict. If they can't behave, they can't play. Perhaps writing up some 'house rules' with their input will help? Sorry I'm not more help, school-agers in large numbers drive me crazy.

[Nickel]

I have this problem sometimes with my girl scout troop. When they are getting out of hand I separate them. I will "yell" stop. Look at me. and then I will pick a spot on the floor and say a come sit right here. b come sit right here. c sit here and walk around the room until they are all apart. and when everyone is quiet and sitting I tell them that it is not okay to yell and shout. and that if they continue to do it I will start calling parents to come get them. and if that happens I KNOW the parents will not be happy having to leave work and come pick up their child because they are not listening. Now, you are all to sit quietly until I tell you to get up.

And let them sit there. If they start whispering look at them and call their name. Look at them and say a? should I call your mom/dad? And if they still continue to misbehave, follow through. Or even go so far as to tell the loudest one to come here and call his mom/dad himself and tell them why mom/dad has to come get them....

It works 90% of the time with my group, who is thankfully all girls. I would put my foot down and stop it right now. Also, tell them they are going to the park if they can behave. They get three strikes as a group. So if all of them are being loud, strike 1, etc... But you don't have to yell per se to get your point across, but you will have to put your foot down. And taking away privileges is a great way to do it.

I hope that helps somewhat. They also may have some pent up energy, so maybe do some group exercises in the morning or go run outside for an hour when they first arrive. Sometimes tired kids are good kids, well, at least the older ones.... sometimes....

[countrymom]

this is why I stopped watching them. They are too much work because they don't know how to entertain themselves????? Yesterday I have a brother of one, and all day my kids played with him (he's the same age as my ydd) and at one point he was saying over and over again "I'm bored, I'm bored" I had enough, he just came back from the library and wasn't even in the house 10 min and was chanting I'm bored. I asked him what he does at home and he tells me that he plays, so I told him to go play with toys. All this kid is use to is playing with video games. My children shouldn't have to entertain him all the time, luckily it he only comes twice a week. I don't understand why my kids can find something to do all day but he can't.

[Heidi]

There are a lot of good ideas here!

I think the first step is to sit down with everyone for a "class meeting". Ask them "are you having fun so far this summer? no? well, why not?" Explain that YOU are certainly not having fun, and how are WE going to change this?

Have a brainstorming session about rules, then about what they would like to do this summer (if you aren't familiar with brainstorming techniques, I'm sure you can google it). Ask the kids what they think the consequences should be when they don't follow rules.

I'm the kind of person that expects pretty much blind obedience from younger children, but as they get older, they earn the right to be more involved in the decision making. I think you will all be happier if you try the team approach.

I would incorporate some sort of reward for a good effort. A few ideas might be an art show at your house to show off all their projects (complete with ginger ale "champagne" and appetizers they prepare), or a trip to a nearby amusement park or water park (you don't have to pay for it, and parents must go also). I called Kalahari in the Dells last year, and they gave me a big discount for bringin a group of 20. Each family paid their own way, and they were responsible for themselves. It was great!

Something like "I'd really like you all to earn a reward for having a good summer. Let's start over". Use a calendar and at the end of each day, let the "team" decide if they deserved a sticker (or a smiley face) on the calendar that day. If they get xx smileys, you'll plan the reward.

[nothingwithoutjoy]

I would like to respectfully disagree with some of the above advice. I think the more you fight them, the more they'll resist. My teaching philosophy is based on respect--treating children with the same respect I would an adult--not on asserting power over children. School-agers can be such a challenge; they've been cooped up, told what to do all day. They're asserting independence and can be so loud and rowdy! But they also have such awesome ideas and such incredible capacity to inspire the younger children. (Now, I will add that I have a lot of school-agers, but only those who were with me as younger children. So I don't have the added problem of kids coming in for just the summer and having to start from scratch with them.)

It sounds to me like they could use huge blocks of outside time, and access to materials for projects of their own creation rather than teacher-directed activities.

What works for me:
We spend the whole morning outside, coming in for lunch and nap.
While I put the younger kids down for nap, the school-agers may read, write, or draw. That's so they'll be totally quiet. Once I get the others to sleep, they may expand to quiet activities that don't require my help. They generally spend this time in the studio, where they have free access to all our art supplies. This week, for example, they created puppets, money, tip jar, turn-off-your-cell-phone sign, programs, seat numbers, etc, and planned a puppet show. They could also do puzzles, games, etc. Sometimes they just read.
After nap, the younger kids join them and usually get caught up in the cool projects begun by the older kids.

I gave each child a journal at the beginning of the summer and asked them to begin it with a list, collage, drawing or something of what they wanted to do/study/explore/learn/read this summer. If they ever seem stalled, I refer them back to their own plans.

Hope the rest of your summer goes better!

[momma2girls]

I have stopped doing school aged children about 2 yrs. ago. UGHH!!!

[providerandmomof4]

Well... I really appreciate all of your advice...I swear, sometimes this forum is my saving grace. Just to hear that others have gone through the same things that I have. My friends want to hear my funny daycare stories but seem to lose interest if I want to vent for very long, usually ending with a "I don't know how you do it." Thanks everyone for the support and great ideas!happyface

[melskids]

Do you have JUST school age in your program, or are you trying to mesh them in with younger kids?

I have to say, I agree with Lise on this one.

School agers come with their own set of challenges, for sure. But my mantra is "bad kids are bored kids".

When my kids become bored or show bad behaviors, I take a step back and re-evaluate the program I am offering. Is it age appropriate? Am I challenging them enough?

I let my SA decide much of their program and activities themselves. We make a "bucket list" at the beginning of summer. They plan the outings, activities, menus, everything. The MORE you involve them in the decision making, the more they take responsibility for their role in the program.

I do agree with the other posters as well. Any bad behaviors DO need to be nipped in the bud as soon as they occur.

[Countrygal]

I know I"m rather "new" (this time around) to daycare, but I have raised 4 children and homeschooled them all. AND I have done daycare for SA before as well.

I have to agree with Heidi. I would start by brainstorming, but I'd have a list of ideas and rules that are "musts" to me, like not disrespecting my property. I would expand the brainstorming to "What would a perfect day at daycare look like to you?" What would you like to do all day while you are here?

You have plenty to suggest things like a baseball game (if you don't have room is there a park near by where all ages can play?), kick ball, jump rope for the girls, even a rousing game of hide and go seek. I'd dare to bet at least several if not all of these kids are used to being somehow entertained by electronics all day. I would use the electronics as a reward. Movie on Friday of the group's choice (or switch up individuals to choose) for good behavior throughout the week, for example. Pick a movie these older kids would have interest in, but of course, one that would be parent approved. Or make homemade ice cream with them. Bake with them (boys like to cook, too). Have them be responsible for planning lunch and making it one day a week, under your guidance ONLY. Help them to follow nutritional guidelines. I think activities like this would help to keep them focused and involved instead of running wild. Have them read to the younger kids, or play a game with them (individually, not the whole group). Give each of them the assignment to create a game for the younger children and let them at it! Then let them lead the youngers in playing the game - explaining it, teaching it and carrying it out....

I'm just giving suggestions, and have no idea if these ideas would work with your group. But one or two of them might be worth a try..... I'm sure you'll come up with many more ideas once you start thinking along those lines.

You've had lots of good suggestions. I hope that things will begin to settle down for you! {{{HUGS}}}

[daycarekay]

The things described this thread are a big reason why I left middle school teaching. The level of disrespect at that level was just not something I was interested in dealing with. They often acted "too cool" to do projects and activities, but weren't capable of taking proper notes and listening and learning from lectures or teacher-led discussions. I was constantly dealing with complaints. "I'm bored," "this is too hard!" or "this is stupid." Just one rotten child could turn the classroom of 30 into a bit of a madhouse. They would constantly argue and try to start fights. After three years of it, I was done. I did not go into teaching to spend 97% of my time managing bad behavior. Taking privileges away didn't do much for a lot of the kids. The parents would be on the side of their kid, and often refused things like detention or book work. I was very strict and structured, but just one slip-up could ruin the class for weeks. It's just not in my personality to be in b__ch mode all the time, and that's what they responded to! It was very difficult for me.

I know it's not the same as daycare, and I was able to implement a little more structure- plus, I only had them for 45 minutes at a time, not all day- but I can absolutely relate.

I think you got some good feedback and ideas from this thread. You have to be very stern, 100% of the time. Removing privileges and talking candidly about the fun things you have planned and want them to be able to earn could be successful. It often depends on the group of kids. Just keep remembering- you only have them for a short time. It's not forever! Do the best you can, don't blame or get down on yourself, and try to start each day with a fresh outlook. Good luck!

[boysx5]

Thats why I no longer do SA having five of my own boys I hafe learned the younger the better