Have To Term A Perfect Family, Don't Want To!

[EchoMom]

What would you all do in this situation???

I have a 10 month old DC infant (one week younger than my DS, so cute together!) that has been with me since 4 months old. He is an EASY baby to care for, I really enjoy having him and his parents have been the ideal customers! They drop off late, pick up early, never pay late, never a conflict ever, just a terrific ideal perfect daycare relationship!

BUT mom is pregnant! In fact, when she delivers her babies will only be 14 months apart. I have another 6 month old DCG who's been with me since she was 10 weeks old. Again, a great family, never done anything wrong, zero reason or desire to term.

So with my son, 10mos, DCB 10 mos, and DCG 6 mos, my infant spots are full. DCM wanted to bring both her babies to me, but I cannot accept another infant under age 2! So, she'll have to leave. I don't want her to!

What would you do if your infant spots were full and a current family had another infant on the way, so close in age! Only 14 months apart, I can't even fudge and say well, he's ALMOST 2...

[AfterSchoolMom]

If it were me, I'd term the DCG. Terming a family with one child vs two seems like a better business decision. Either way, it stinks when you have great families and can't keep them!

[JenNJ]

Can you hire someone temporarily so you can keep the family?

[Blackcat31]

Can you get a variance in your state to have a temporary lapse in age capacity? That is what I usually do if the new enrollee is from a current family.

I would also maybe let the pregnant mom know that you won't have room for her new one until one of your other kids reaches age 2 and let her find alternate or temporary care until the space opens.

I have done that before too. I can't control when dcm's get pregnant but I have no issue giving them the problem and if they really want space here....they find a way to make it work until I do have the room for both their kids.

I currently have a pregnant mom who will be waiting 6 months for me to have the room for her new one. She hired a family friend to provide services until I can take over.

[EchoMom]

But how could I term DCG when they've done nothing wrong at all?? It was DCB's mom who chose to have her kids SOOOOOOOOO close together. Both families started with me at the very start of my business 6 months ago.

I don't think that would be very nice at all to term DCG for no reason whatsoever, but thanks for your opinion, I appreciate it!

Any other thoughts??? I keep thinking how I could make it work until the boys turn 2 years old...

If new baby is born in November and mom takes 3 months maternity leave (last time she took 4 but I don't know if she can do that again) that would put me at Febuary and the boys would be 17 months. Early June my mom joins me for the summer to help with daycare so then technically my own son could be hers and off my ratio. Then end of Aug. the boys both turn 2.

So it would only be about 4 months that I would be out of ratio and have 4 under age 2 when I'm only supposed to have 3 under 2. I am legally unlicensed so no one checks on me now anyway and I don't think any parents would mind because they all keep asking me if I have room for friend's babies anyway.

I know this isn't the RIGHT answer, but... Thoughts??? Am I just being too attached trying to bend over backward to keep a family I care about and enjoy working with??? Should I just view it as cut and dry business, sorry I don't have a spot, goodbye?

It's just that if she leaves with her 2 babies, I'll fill her spot with a new baby anyway and I just hate to lose them.

[EchoMom]

I don't think I'd have to ask for any variance or anything since I'm legally unlicensed and no one checks on me anyway. But what IF someone complained, what happens if a legally unlicensed Type B home daycare is out of ratio??? I don't want to make a habit of this at all but this seems like a special circumstance. I can't find out what the penalty would be ANYWHERE. Would I get a warning? Would they just tell me to get a license? Or would I be fined or a criminal???!

[texascare]

Leave it in their hands. Just explain that you can't take another baby. Maybe they will find a temp solution until you have an opening? In this buisness you never know that could be tomorrow or in 6 months. Don't term them. Wait until the baby is born and see where you are on kids. You kjust never know.....

[Willow]

Never mind, just read you aren't licensed.....I've got no clue how the rules/laws work for that circumstance.

Hope you are able to sort something out though!

[EchoMom]

I like everyone's idea about a temporary variance, that lets me know that exceptions CAN be made. But I'm legally unlicensed, so what should I do, just fudge for the few/several months???

[snbauser]

Do yourself a favor and do not term anyone. At this point all I would say is the same as a pp - you do not have room for the new baby. That takes it out of your hands and allows them to decide what they want to do.

[Solandia]

What would I do? Get a variance. I have done that before when there is less than a 6 months out-of-age-bracket issue. But you are license exempt, so, that isnt an option.

It is still too soon to even consider terming anyone. Really, I would just tell the pg dcm that currently there is no space for the new baby when her maternity leave is up, but there would be space once her older baby child 2. BUT that so many things can happen, that it may not be an issue after her leave is up anyway (the other child's family could move/job loss/etc). Make sure you have a large-ish deposit for the older child (unless he is going to be attending during maternity leave).

Here's the thing...second time moms are notoriously fickle. Unless she has a super-great paying job or absolutely loves her job....she isn't going to be back after maternity leave. The job & the daycare are the very, very last people to know. I certainly wouldn't term the 6mo, as you cannot guarantee that the pg mom will even go back to work after baby#2 until she has been back to work.

[EchoMom]

Pregnant mom swears she's going back to work. They JUST bought a brand new house and she says she HAS to go back to work.

But she COULD just get a nanny which would be way easier on her.

[Sunchimes]

I had the exact same problem, except I did have a child I was glad to term (newest, most difficult, but the best family). So that worked out. I have 2 siblings and another dcg.

Now, dcg's mom is pregnant. I told her I couldn't keep him. She said she wanted her daughter to stay with me, and she would make other arrangements for the baby until I had an opening. She didn't even flinch about it. It doesn't hurt to tell them that you loved her son and the family and would like to keep him if she can put the baby elsewhere.

You never know, the first family may move away or something and you could have an unexpected opening for the baby.

FWIW, I am legally unlicensed (we call it listed in Texas). I asked for a variance and they told me they didn't have the power to give a variance. The state congress set the rules and they were the only ones with power to change them. I wrote to all of my state reps but not one single one replied. I wrote their names down for election time.

[originalkat]

I would be tempted to have one extra kid for 4 months until your mom can help and the boys turn 2 in August. If they did come and check on you, you would probably just have to term someone at that point. I think I would take my chances since you are unlicensed.

[seebachers]

don't term anyone....hire a short term helper until they hit two or at the very least until your mother comes there. Win/Win for everyone