Possible Special Needs

[Hunni Bee]

I have a 4 year old who started with me two months ago. If anyone remembers, this is the child who just showed up one Tuesday.

He seriously needs evaluation, but the parents are refusing. When I was having my CDA observation a couple days ago, the lady asked me did he count in my special needs ratio, so it's to the point where other, outside people are picking up on it.

I dont like to throw labels around, so i won't. Here are some of his daily behaviors:

• Can't stand for anyone to touch him, brush by him, play with him etc
• Grunts, screams, whines instead of using words, other he has a normal vocabulary
• Plays with the same toys day after day
• Focuses on very small, random things for long periods - like a speck of lint or something somebody did an hour ago
• Inconsolable screaming at transition times, at routines such as washing hands, time to go home, etc.

Its getting so he needs his own adult to keep him from falling apart at every activity. We spoken with his family, but they refuse to meet with us. They just keep saying "well he never had these problems at his old daycare" and implying that we are letting other kids bother him and that's why he screams all the time.

Its getting a bit overwhelming, and two of my part-timers will become full time on Friday, including another special needs child.

What can I do here? I really want him to be evaluated so at least we can know how to handle him.

[e.j.]

Its getting so he needs his own adult to keep him from falling apart at every activity. We spoken with his family, but they refuse to meet with us. They just keep saying "well he never had these problems at his old daycare" and implying that we are letting other kids bother him and that's why he screams all the time.

It may be true that he never experienced these problems at the old day care but he's experiencing them now and there's got to be something causing him to behave the way he does. Is there somewhere in the day care where they could sit quietly and observe him without him seeing them? If so, would they be willing to come in to do that?

If not, would they give you permission to video record him? Either way, they could see not only him in action but the adults and other children in the day care, too. If they could see his behaviors with their own eyes, maybe it would convince them that the other kids aren't being allowed to both him and that he really does need to be evaluated.