Absolutely Fuming! Rude Parent

[Creek]

Sorry in advance - this is long!


I just signed up a new DCG 2 weeks ago, she was to start at the end of July. This is actually the family who I posted about already saying that they asked a million questions, and I felt like they were making me jump through hoops during my interview process, and the following week as well. I really liked their little girl, so I chose them. They were happy.

Unrelated, I had planned a yard sale to sell DD's clothes among other things. An insane amount. Mom came last weekend to my home, picked out some stuff, and said she'd pay me later. I was taken back, but didn't really know what to say so I accepted it. The week went by without hearing from her, so I emailed her last night and asked her to drop by today with the money. She said, great - see you tomorrow basically.

Backstory: Last weekend my parents got a puppy and on a whim I decided I would take the brother puppy. We had him for 2 days and I thought he would be too much work with the DCK and the puppy so he is over living at my parents house now.

My brothers came to help me with my yard sale today and brought the two dogs, and they were on the lawn when the new dkg's mom showed up. She was pleasant, nothing for me to think anything was off. Then I got an email a few hours later stating that she had to speak with me. I wasn't too sure what it was about but I called her right away.

She said "hello", I said "Hello, ____ how are you doing?" very nicely. We were having a good busy day. Right off the bat she was rude. Speaking down to me. She told me that she couldn't believe I had dogs. I explained the situation, that I don't have a dog but there may be a possibility in the future that I could take him back. Honestly, the chance is pretty slim but I don't ever want to say that my situation may not change. This is my home first. I was nice the entire time she belittled me, and brought up my cat, and the fact that I had cat hair on the stairs leading upstairs and how that upset her. I clean every day, a few times a day. Yes, I have a long haired cat and she gets hair about. There is hair on the stairs as this week has been challenging and I am doing everything I can right now. She said that she was 'concerned about my level of cleanliness" and asked that I explain it. I was shocked. I mean, she's been to my home twice, signed my contract and paid my non-refundable fee. You would imagine someone who did that would be comfortable with you.

I wish I would have seen this coming. I just took a break in writing and she called back saying that she was refusing the spot and wanted her fee back. I was honestly thankful that she declined the spot, I now see how this would have been a horrible match. The fee is non-refundable, and she signed a contract for this. She is upset.

I am so upset to my stomach. It is times like this that I wonder why I'm even doing home care. I really love all my DCK's. I just sometimes forget that good families are so hard to find. I can appreciate a parent having concerns and asking questions but to be outright rude and belittling like she was is horrible.

What would you do regarding her refund request?

[Hunni Bee]

Sorry in advance - this is long!


I just signed up a new DCG 2 weeks ago, she was to start at the end of July. This is actually the family who I posted about already saying that they asked a million questions, and I felt like they were making me jump through hoops during my interview process, and the following week as well. I really liked their little girl, so I chose them. They were happy.

Unrelated, I had planned a yard sale to sell DD's clothes among other things. An insane amount. Mom came last weekend to my home, picked out some stuff, and said she'd pay me later. I was taken back, but didn't really know what to say so I accepted it. The week went by without hearing from her, so I emailed her last night and asked her to drop by today with the money. She said, great - see you tomorrow basically.

Backstory: Last weekend my parents got a puppy and on a whim I decided I would take the brother puppy. We had him for 2 days and I thought he would be too much work with the DCK and the puppy so he is over living at my parents house now.

My brothers came to help me with my yard sale today and brought the two dogs, and they were on the lawn when the new dkg's mom showed up. She was pleasant, nothing for me to think anything was off. Then I got an email a few hours later stating that she had to speak with me. I wasn't too sure what it was about but I called her right away.

She said "hello", I said "Hello, ____ how are you doing?" very nicely. We were having a good busy day. Right off the bat she was rude. Speaking down to me. She told me that she couldn't believe I had dogs. I explained the situation, that I don't have a dog but there may be a possibility in the future that I could take him back. Honestly, the chance is pretty slim but I don't ever want to say that my situation may not change. This is my home first. I was nice the entire time she belittled me, and brought up my cat, and the fact that I had cat hair on the stairs leading upstairs and how that upset her. I clean every day, a few times a day. Yes, I have a long haired cat and she gets hair about. There is hair on the stairs as this week has been challenging and I am doing everything I can right now. She said that she was 'concerned about my level of cleanliness" and asked that I explain it. I was shocked. I mean, she's been to my home twice, signed my contract and paid my non-refundable fee. You would imagine someone who did that would be comfortable with you.

I wish I would have seen this coming. I just took a break in writing and she called back saying that she was refusing the spot and wanted her fee back. I was honestly thankful that she declined the spot, I now see how this would have been a horrible match. The fee is non-refundable, and she signed a contract for this. She is upset.

I am so upset to my stomach. It is times like this that I wonder why I'm even doing home care. I really love all my DCK's. I just sometimes forget that good families are so hard to find. I can appreciate a parent having concerns and asking questions but to be outright rude and belittling like she was is horrible.

What would you do regarding her refund request?

Nothing. She signed the contract. It's over.

If she calls back asking for the deposit, kindly reiterate that it's nonrefundable and she signed a contract to that effect. and that you too have nothing more to discuss. Ignore any further calls from her.

[Former Teacher]

I do not blame you at all for being upset!

As for her deposit: you snooze you lose. She signed the contract.

I remember at my former center the policy was a flat non refundable $50 deposit to hold the spot. This couple paid for their newborn to be at our center. Mom was 7 months pregnant. They would bring the baby when he was 6 weeks old.

Well we didn't hear from this couple. They never came. They didn't sign any paperwork, just paid the deposit, so we had no numbers. A few months later, lo and behold, the father comes in and wants his money. I, myself, talked to this family so I KNEW he knew about the deposit being nonrefundable.

The father came in and explained that the grandmother wound up quitting her job to stay at home with the baby so they didn't have to pay daycare. Blah blah blah. Finally I said I am sorry but its nonrefundable. He was SO mad. He was saying that he had no money and that he really needed the cash. Again I explained calmly that I was sorry but it is nonrefundable and that we held the spot etc. Finally he blurted that he needed that money to pay for his new daycare lady ::

I finally had to ask him to leave!

[jojosmommy]

Nope. Sorry. Tell her clearly its non refundable. Then like the pp said ignore her.

[Kiki]

Nothing. She signed the contract. It's over.

If she calls back asking for the deposit, kindly reiterate that it's nonrefundable and she signed a contract to that effect. and that you too have nothing more to discuss. Ignore any further calls from her.

That. I have a uh..'Bummer, ****s to be you.' attitude with stuff like this.

I'm sorry that she was so mean to you, but I am happy for you that she declined the spot, I can only imagine what she could have put you through later on!

[Blackcat31]

If your contract says the fee is nonrefundable then she doesn't get a refund. It is her job to read and know the contents of the contract before she signs and agrees with it. No money back.

As far as the money for the garage sale stuff I would tell her she needs to pay you or you will have her charged with theft. She can't just come and take things and say "I will pay you later".....who does that? :confused:

[Former Teacher]

As far as the money for the garage sale stuff I would tell her she needs to pay you or you will have her charged with theft. She can't just come and take things and say "I will pay you later".....who does that? :confused:

Good point Blackcat!

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Nothing. She signed the contract. It's over.

If she calls back asking for the deposit, kindly reiterate that it's nonrefundable and she signed a contract to that effect. and that you too have nothing more to discuss. Ignore any further calls from her.

Exactly this.

As for what the stole without paying for. I would tell her she needs to bring cash to you within the next 24 hours or she will need to return all the items that she took.

[Hunni Bee]

As far as the money for the garage sale stuff I would tell her she needs to pay you or you will have her charged with theft. She can't just come and take things and say "I will pay you later".....who does that? :confused:

As much as it ****s, I kinda feel like that ship has sailed, because she shouldn't have been allowed to leave the OP's home without paying. That's why I didn't mention it.

And also, I was bit confused, because it seemed like the mom had come back to pay yesterday and that's when she saw the dogs. She took the clothes last weekend. I think.

[Crazy8]

I'd say she is completely out of luck if your contract says the deposit is non-refundable.

And I'm also taking it as she came by and paid for the garage sale stuff, right?? Hope you at least got the money for that!

[Creek]

She came and paid for the clothes on Saturday, that's when she saw the dogs.

It's seriously been a **** storm ever since. She's called me a few times, saying she wants her money and saying it isn't fair. I am honestly so sick to my stomach, I want to cry - this whole weekend. It's been awful for me My in-laws are here, and I've been in a horrible mood the entire time. I get anxious with things like this, and I just want her to leave me alone. Why can't she do this?

She told me today that she wants the contract and anything else she signed tonight. I photocopied them tonight for her.

I am so sad about this whole thing.

[SunshineMama]

Sorry in advance - this is long!


I just signed up a new DCG 2 weeks ago, she was to start at the end of July. This is actually the family who I posted about already saying that they asked a million questions, and I felt like they were making me jump through hoops during my interview process, and the following week as well. I really liked their little girl, so I chose them. They were happy.

Unrelated, I had planned a yard sale to sell DD's clothes among other things. An insane amount. Mom came last weekend to my home, picked out some stuff, and said she'd pay me later. I was taken back, but didn't really know what to say so I accepted it. The week went by without hearing from her, so I emailed her last night and asked her to drop by today with the money. She said, great - see you tomorrow basically.

Backstory: Last weekend my parents got a puppy and on a whim I decided I would take the brother puppy. We had him for 2 days and I thought he would be too much work with the DCK and the puppy so he is over living at my parents house now.

My brothers came to help me with my yard sale today and brought the two dogs, and they were on the lawn when the new dkg's mom showed up. She was pleasant, nothing for me to think anything was off. Then I got an email a few hours later stating that she had to speak with me. I wasn't too sure what it was about but I called her right away.

She said "hello", I said "Hello, ____ how are you doing?" very nicely. We were having a good busy day. Right off the bat she was rude. Speaking down to me. She told me that she couldn't believe I had dogs. I explained the situation, that I don't have a dog but there may be a possibility in the future that I could take him back. Honestly, the chance is pretty slim but I don't ever want to say that my situation may not change. This is my home first. I was nice the entire time she belittled me, and brought up my cat, and the fact that I had cat hair on the stairs leading upstairs and how that upset her. I clean every day, a few times a day. Yes, I have a long haired cat and she gets hair about. There is hair on the stairs as this week has been challenging and I am doing everything I can right now. She said that she was 'concerned about my level of cleanliness" and asked that I explain it. I was shocked. I mean, she's been to my home twice, signed my contract and paid my non-refundable fee. You would imagine someone who did that would be comfortable with you.

I wish I would have seen this coming. I just took a break in writing and she called back saying that she was refusing the spot and wanted her fee back. I was honestly thankful that she declined the spot, I now see how this would have been a horrible match. The fee is non-refundable, and she signed a contract for this. She is upset.

I am so upset to my stomach. It is times like this that I wonder why I'm even doing home care. I really love all my DCK's. I just sometimes forget that good families are so hard to find. I can appreciate a parent having concerns and asking questions but to be outright rude and belittling like she was is horrible.

What would you do regarding her refund request?

Keep the deposit. That's why you have the contract in the first place- to protect you from jerks like that.

[MN Day Mom]

If your contract clearly states that it is non refundable, then no, I would not refund the deposit. We make our deposits non refundable for a very good reason.

Give her copies of everything and then don't give her another minute of your time.

[countrymom]

I would have photo copied the contract for a fee. clearly its her fault, now she's trying to get out of it. Don't back down. If she's done this to you, who knows who else she has done this too.

[cheerfuldom]

Stop taking calls or emails. Send her a certified letter with her copies and a letter stating that per the signed contract, no fee will be refunded and No communication in the future will be necessary.