Should I Forget About It?

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  • texascare
    Daycare.com Member
    • Mar 2011
    • 203

    #16
    In this business you have to have a back bone. I didn't get one until several years of being in this business, and I had a daycare parent slap me in the face. Yes I said slap me. Since then I have had the following mind set. My house, my rules. I can terminate you. Everything I have in my contract is what I have learned over the 25 years I have been in business. I still don't like confrontation, my heart beats faster and I get all nervous but I have to tell my self I will not be run over. What is the point of having a contract if you do not enforce it. If you don't make this family pay, you will be more upset with yourself than them. I have found that there are some very wonderful people on this site who will encourage you and help you anyway you need, but ultimately it is up to you as how you want to run your business.

    Comment

    • jokalima
      Daycare.com Member
      • May 2012
      • 477

      #17
      Well thanks again

      Today nothing again, what is happening is that the reports are staying in the same place I put them the day before, that is unusual with this family, but this week is appears to be the norm, so IDK if they are leaving them there because it might look like they did not read it at all or is just that they are really forgetting about the reports.

      Question to all of you:

      How is your relationship with your parents? I mean, I have a pretty nice relationship with this family and that is the part that makes it more difficult. Do you keep your relationships strictly professional, no talking of things not related to day care? IDK how do you do this?

      Comment

      • Kiki
        Advanced Daycare.com Member
        • Dec 2011
        • 350

        #18
        Originally posted by jokalima
        Well thanks again
        Question to all of you:

        How is your relationship with your parents? I mean, I have a pretty nice relationship with this family and that is the part that makes it more difficult. Do you keep your relationships strictly professional, no talking of things not related to day care? IDK how do you do this?
        All but one of my relationships are professional only. And I really wish that one was professional as well. I know more about this families life than I should, and it makes it harder for me to give them notices, or anything that could be taken as me being mean to them.
        Honestly, I don't really have to 'keep' any of my relationships from becoming personal because 3/4 of my families just drop off/pick up and leave. If I have something to say to them about anything they need to be aware of, I do it quickly and hand them a letter with more details, then they are out the door.

        So are you adding the extra late fees onto their daily report, or are you actually physically handing them the letter? I just had a situation with a parent and rate increases, and thanks to advice from wonderful Blackcat, I found that parents actually pay attention to money issues if you tell them, and then hand them a letter that has more information on it.
        I suggest that tonight you hand her the notice of the fees, and say, 'Hey, there are still some outstanding fees due, this invoice will give you more details about what they are. If you want to talk to me about it in more detail feel free to give me a call tonight once you make it home.' or something along those lines..

        Comment

        • Blackcat31
          • Oct 2010
          • 36124

          #19
          Originally posted by jokalima
          Well thanks again

          Today nothing again, what is happening is that the reports are staying in the same place I put them the day before, that is unusual with this family, but this week is appears to be the norm, so IDK if they are leaving them there because it might look like they did not read it at all or is just that they are really forgetting about the reports.

          Question to all of you:

          How is your relationship with your parents? I mean, I have a pretty nice relationship with this family and that is the part that makes it more difficult. Do you keep your relationships strictly professional, no talking of things not related to day care? IDK how do you do this?
          First off..dont put the reports somewhere that they are responsible for looking for them and taking them. HAND them to the parents. That way YOU know they got them. You can't make them read it but you can surely hand deliver them.

          As far as the relationships I have with my DCF's....for lack of better words...I am totally 100% blunt and unfiltered. I have the opposite problem than most providers here in that I say what I think and say what I mean and more often than not I don't say it in a nice or non-offending way. I often say things in a manner that is to the point and very direct and the complaints I get from my DCP's is that I don't mince words or "soften the blow" for them when talking about something.

          I am VERY business like with my families but yet can chat and share with them on a comfortable level too as I am part of their family and spend just as much time with their child as they do. My families are all very respectful and follow all my rules and policies. I think that they appreciate that I have very clear expectations and boundaries as it doesn't leave them wondering what they should or shouldn't do.

          On the other hand they are also all aware that if they ahve an issue or concern, I am ALWAYS open to discussion and will always put their child's best interest first. I stress open communication and respect on a regular basis and my parents all seem to know and understand this quite well as I love ALL of them..

          ...now ask me this same thing 10 years ago and I would probably have a different answer but in the last decade, I have spent less and less tie being concerned about how others perceive me and more about what works for ME in my life and business.

          Comment

          • My3cents
            Daycare.com Member
            • Jan 2012
            • 3387

            #20
            Originally posted by Blackcat31
            First off..dont put the reports somewhere that they are responsible for looking for them and taking them. HAND them to the parents. That way YOU know they got them. You can't make them read it but you can surely hand deliver them.

            As far as the relationships I have with my DCF's....for lack of better words...I am totally 100% blunt and unfiltered. I have the opposite problem than most providers here in that I say what I think and say what I mean and more often than not I don't say it in a nice or non-offending way. I often say things in a manner that is to the point and very direct and the complaints I get from my DCP's is that I don't mince words or "soften the blow" for them when talking about something.

            I am VERY business like with my families but yet can chat and share with them on a comfortable level too as I am part of their family and spend just as much time with their child as they do. My families are all very respectful and follow all my rules and policies. I think that they appreciate that I have very clear expectations and boundaries as it doesn't leave them wondering what they should or shouldn't do.

            On the other hand they are also all aware that if they ahve an issue or concern, I am ALWAYS open to discussion and will always put their child's best interest first. I stress open communication and respect on a regular basis and my parents all seem to know and understand this quite well as I love ALL of them..

            ...now ask me this same thing 10 years ago and I would probably have a different answer but in the last decade, I have spent less and less tie being concerned about how others perceive me and more about what works for ME in my life and business.
            me too! I do struggle from time to time, but I come here and I get straightened right into a reality check quick. I could have wrote this-

            Comment

            • My3cents
              Daycare.com Member
              • Jan 2012
              • 3387

              #21
              Originally posted by My3cents
              me too! I do struggle from time to time, but I come here and I get straightened right into a reality check quick. I could have wrote this-
              my member name should be.......andonemorething..... I seem to always have add ons after I post. Sorry-

              it is always best to "talk" with your parents. They are just people too. I use written, texting, email, phone as the next step. Most people relate best to verbal and it takes practice to do this with backbone. You will make mistakes, learn from them and keep on standing up for yourself.

              best-

              Comment

              • Former Teacher
                Advanced Daycare.com Member
                • Apr 2009
                • 1331

                #22
                Originally posted by jokalima
                I have a family that owes me 30.00 from a late fee, I have sent 2 notes home and no response, nothing at all, they don't even say if they are going to pay it at the end of the week or what. I am terrible at asking for money verbally, I just hate it, makes me very uncomfortable. What should I do? Maybe they are thinking that they paid it already when they paid 20.00 last week for the previous week's late fee, she handed the money and said "here for all the times we've been late" :confused: And that was the same day that they cam in late to pick up and I had to add another 30.00, told them verbally that day and sent a note home, nothing on Monday, yesterday I sent another note, nothing today.:confused::confused::confused::confused::confused:
                Do not let this slip by!

                Take advantage of me once, shame on you. Take advantage of twice, shame on me.

                Trust me, they WILL do it again if you don't nip it in the bud!

                Comment

                • Countrygal
                  Advanced Daycare.com Member
                  • Aug 2011
                  • 976

                  #23
                  I'm gong to come from a different perspective here, and probably everyone else is right.

                  I live in a very rural area where there are tons of "babysitters" who will watch your kids for anywhere from .50 to 1.00 less per hour than I do. I run a curriculum, schedule, and learning environment. Most (if not all) of them do not. However, despite this, it is hard to fill slots around here. Clientele is widely scattered and a lot of people are unemployed or on state support. Sooooo, that said.....

                  I have two very good dcf. I would not want to lose them. I am limited to 3 children, even tho I'm certified. I have and will continue to carry a deficit for a limited amount of time. Everyone has money troubles occasionally. I did. That's why I'm doing this (daycare)!!! Usually they are extremely good about paying, but occasionally they run a little behind. As long as they pay up in a week or so I don't make a deal about it. I send them a statement every Monday showing them their balance. If they are behind, I definitely mention it. I feel they want to know! I would! But I will not terminate or even threaten to do so unless they get way behind (I'm talking a week's worth). Then I would probably demand some money. I haven't reached that point yet, but I may someday.

                  I just wanted to give you another perspective.

                  Comment

                  • Sunshine44
                    Running away from home
                    • May 2011
                    • 278

                    #24
                    Originally posted by Countrygal
                    I'm gong to come from a different perspective here, and probably everyone else is right.

                    I live in a very rural area where there are tons of "babysitters" who will watch your kids for anywhere from .50 to 1.00 less per hour than I do. I run a curriculum, schedule, and learning environment. Most (if not all) of them do not. However, despite this, it is hard to fill slots around here. Clientele is widely scattered and a lot of people are unemployed or on state support. Sooooo, that said.....

                    I have two very good dcf. I would not want to lose them. I am limited to 3 children, even tho I'm certified. I have and will continue to carry a deficit for a limited amount of time. Everyone has money troubles occasionally. I did. That's why I'm doing this (daycare)!!! Usually they are extremely good about paying, but occasionally they run a little behind. As long as they pay up in a week or so I don't make a deal about it. I send them a statement every Monday showing them their balance. If they are behind, I definitely mention it. I feel they want to know! I would! But I will not terminate or even threaten to do so unless they get way behind (I'm talking a week's worth). Then I would probably demand some money. I haven't reached that point yet, but I may someday.

                    I just wanted to give you another perspective.


                    Countrygal, I get what you are saying, but you should not have to wait for money that is YOURS! It is not our problem that our daycare parents don't have any money. They have a bill to pay and need to pay it. We all have bills, we all have issues, people need to stop pushing their problems on others.

                    Yes, that's probably mean of me. But oh well.

                    Also, I am flexible, always have been, but if they just don't pay me. I would be pissed off. If a family was having issues, then they need to come to me and have a chat...we can then come to an agreement about paying later...until then, they can't just 'ignore' the fact that they owe me money.

                    Comment

                    • jokalima
                      Daycare.com Member
                      • May 2012
                      • 477

                      #25
                      Originally posted by Countrygal
                      I'm gong to come from a different perspective here, and probably everyone else is right.

                      I live in a very rural area where there are tons of "babysitters" who will watch your kids for anywhere from .50 to 1.00 less per hour than I do. I run a curriculum, schedule, and learning environment. Most (if not all) of them do not. However, despite this, it is hard to fill slots around here. Clientele is widely scattered and a lot of people are unemployed or on state support. Sooooo, that said.....

                      I have two very good dcf. I would not want to lose them. I am limited to 3 children, even tho I'm certified. I have and will continue to carry a deficit for a limited amount of time. Everyone has money troubles occasionally. I did. That's why I'm doing this (daycare)!!! Usually they are extremely good about paying, but occasionally they run a little behind. As long as they pay up in a week or so I don't make a deal about it. I send them a statement every Monday showing them their balance. If they are behind, I definitely mention it. I feel they want to know! I would! But I will not terminate or even threaten to do so unless they get way behind (I'm talking a week's worth). Then I would probably demand some money. I haven't reached that point yet, but I may someday.

                      I just wanted to give you another perspective.
                      Thanks,

                      I totally understand your point. I have a great relationship with this family, but like I said before from time to time they do things that are really hurtful for me. I know they don't have money troubles is the opposite, and it hurts me for them to know that there is a contract and to tell me here, have 20.00 for helping us out, when what they owed was 70.00 for me that is really offensive.
                      Anyways, I've thought about it, read what all of you said, talked to my husband and I am going to give them until Monday to make the payment, if not then I'll remind them about the contract they signed and see what happens.

                      Comment

                      • Ariana
                        Advanced Daycare.com Member
                        • Jun 2011
                        • 8969

                        #26
                        Originally posted by jokalima
                        It really is not about the money, is that I feel disrespected when they do that When they assume when is OK to pay me for extra time or how much is OK to pay me when we have a contract. I feel very offended form time to time with them. There was one day that the parent saw my child's new car seat, the parent had left @ my house his kids old car seat because we were going on a trip next day. When DCD saw my babies car seat he started to say that it looked so much like his babies new car seat, I said "Well maybe it looks alike but this is my car seat" So he stared @ the car seat and stared and kept staring, then asked "Where did you buy it? When did you buy it? For how long you've had it?" And little things like that they do from time to time, that is why now this money issue bugs me so much.

                        I am going to try to be "brave" and keep asking through notes, if they don't pay with next weeks payment then will talk to them, sounds good? I **** at this
                        You really need to put your foot down about this behavior. Confront her personally at the door about the payments and tell her point blank that if payment is not received in full by XYZ then you will be terminating care. It'll **** and you'll feel embarassed and maybe turn red or whatever but you HAVE to do it!!! When you do their whole attitude will change. They'll begin treating you with respect because you're demanding it. You're doing them a favor by taking in their kids....not the other way around. Start treating yourself with more dignity.

                        Comment

                        • My3cents
                          Daycare.com Member
                          • Jan 2012
                          • 3387

                          #27
                          Originally posted by jokalima
                          Thanks,

                          I totally understand your point. I have a great relationship with this family, but like I said before from time to time they do things that are really hurtful for me. I know they don't have money troubles is the opposite, and it hurts me for them to know that there is a contract and to tell me here, have 20.00 for helping us out, when what they owed was 70.00 for me that is really offensive.
                          Anyways, I've thought about it, read what all of you said, talked to my husband and I am going to give them until Monday to make the payment, if not then I'll remind them about the contract they signed and see what happens.
                          Don't keep waiting. Why should you have to wait over the weekend. Today hand them a statement that is highlighted and also verbally tell them that you need to be compensated. Late fees if not paid today! Explain to them that they don't pay you before Monday morning drop off that you will not be accepting the children. I too agree with helping from time to time- you know the ones that need the help and the ones that are habitual offenders. I have helped out in the past but prefer to be paid on time. I need to be able to count on my money. I stress this at interviews. I also tell my parents that it is embarrassing to have to ask to be paid for services rendered

                          Comment

                          • daycare
                            Advanced Daycare.com *********
                            • Feb 2011
                            • 16259

                            #28
                            the more you put you foot down the easier it gets... as with everything you have to practice doing it and the only way to practice is to DO IT!!

                            I tell the parents this...


                            One of the parts I like least about running a daycare business is having to enforce all of the rules and policies to the parents. I never want to be the bad guy and start enforcing fees on anyone.

                            Running a daycare business along with incorporating a preschool program takes a lot of organization, planning and time. As you all know, I do my best to be flexible for everyone when I have been given prior notification.

                            something along the lines of this.......

                            Comment

                            • texascare
                              Daycare.com Member
                              • Mar 2011
                              • 203

                              #29
                              You asked as good question. How is I don't face book any of my clients, I don''t give out my cell number. I don't want them to have access to me 24/7. I wouldn't want my boss to either if I worked an outside job. I try not to get too friendly with parents because it seems when I do something like this happens. I bet if they worked any over time they would;d expect the money to be on their check.....Once you let them burn you it will happen over and over. It is just like a small child--it is a behavior that needs to be corrected. My daycare is a home away from home for the kids I keep but from the get go it is also very professional. Two things you don't mess with me about 1. my money 2. my family. Keep that in mind.

                              Comment

                              • jokalima
                                Daycare.com Member
                                • May 2012
                                • 477

                                #30
                                Got paid my late fee!

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