What Do You Do With 3yo Potty Accidents?

[newtodaycare22]

My dcg has been potty trained since she was 2 (day and night time). A few months ago (around her 3rd birthday) we had a few weeks where we'd have an accident per week, and then it stopped as suddenly as it began. Mom said nothing was different at home.

This week-3 accidents and she's not telling me! She'll pee sitting in a chair and walk away leaving it there, or run to the bathroom but not in time, leaving a puddle on the floor. I keep stressing the importance of TELLING me about her accidents because clearly we cant have pee every where. Well, today, I saw her run to the bathroom right before lunch. She came out and I asked her if she peed in her undies, she said no. (she had on dress so I couldnt be sure but, crazy me, I believed her).

Later, a girl went potty only to step in her pee and I had to call her out on the accident-she left the pee on the floor and ate lunch in her wet undies.

I was so sick of it at this point. The lying! She's a very smart 3 year old who knows what shes doing. I told her that she has to wear a diaper like a baby since she can't act like a big girl. She cried when I made her put it on.

I felt bad about the tears but really-I can't have her 1. peeing everywhere and 2. not telling me! Of course I feel like something is going on but I'm not sure what.

Any advice?Am I a terrible person for the baby comment and putting on the pull up? thanks!

[Willow]

I'd never degrade or punish a kiddo for an accident. No matter what the age.

She may be fibbing about it because she is being punished for the accidents at home or gets the impression that you are not happy with her lately.

Is she sick at all? Or possibly dealing with a UTI?

The fact that she's running and can't make when she usually could before is a huge red flag of some sort of bladder/kidney/urinary tract infection.

If a kiddo starts having accidents out of the blue like that, especially the girls since they tend to have a tougher time wiping properly, I'd insist on a visit to the doc to rule out anything medical before assuming it's behavioral.

[newtodaycare22]

I've had a dcg with sudden accidents and it was a UTI. But that was practically all day and a LOT of pee.

This girl just seems like she doesnt want to stop playing on most occasions and then (sometimes) goes running at the last minute.

You're right though-I'll mention the UTI to mom today.

[Willow]

I bet it's frustrating as all get out in any event.

I hate the smell of pee


If you think it's because she's waiting too long have you considered setting a timer, maybe have her try to go once an hour regardless of if she feels like she has to and either shorten the length of time or stretch it out depending on how she does?

[Blackcat31]

My dcg has been potty trained since she was 2 (day and night time). A few months ago (around her 3rd birthday) we had a few weeks where we'd have an accident per week, and then it stopped as suddenly as it began. Mom said nothing was different at home.

This week-3 accidents and she's not telling me! She'll pee sitting in a chair and walk away leaving it there, or run to the bathroom but not in time, leaving a puddle on the floor. I keep stressing the importance of TELLING me about her accidents because clearly we cant have pee every where. Well, today, I saw her run to the bathroom right before lunch. She came out and I asked her if she peed in her undies, she said no. (she had on dress so I couldnt be sure but, crazy me, I believed her).

Later, a girl went potty only to step in her pee and I had to call her out on the accident-she left the pee on the floor and ate lunch in her wet undies.

I was so sick of it at this point. The lying! She's a very smart 3 year old who knows what shes doing. I told her that she has to wear a diaper like a baby since she can't act like a big girl. She cried when I made her put it on.

I felt bad about the tears but really-I can't have her 1. peeing everywhere and 2. not telling me! Of course I feel like something is going on but I'm not sure what.

Any advice?Am I a terrible person for the baby comment and putting on the pull up? thanks!

No, you are NOT a terrible person! As far as the accidents go, if a child has an accident, we clean it up and move on. I don't really say much about it other than to say "Now remember Janie, when we have to go pee we use the toilet ok?" and leave it at that. If they have a second accident within the same week, they go back in pull ups (I don't care how long they had or have been trained up until this point) until they can go two FULL weeks without an accident.

My environment MUST remain sanitary for the benefit of ALL the children in my care. Group needs will always trump individual needs. If parents want to deal with sanitizing and cleaning up pee numerous times per week at home, that is their right to do so but at my house 2 accidents within a week = Pull up until accident free for a FULL two weeks. It is in the contract so all my parents know this.

[Heidi]

I guess it's all in how you present it.

"You are a stupid baby who needs pull-ups because you wet your pants" is a lot diferent than "I'm sorry, but we need to keep our daycare clean. Until you can make it to the potty all the time, we need to put a pull-up over your panties so that we don't get pee on our things".

Sounds like you were somewhere in the middle there. You can soften the previous conversation by having another one explaining why, and that you still love her, etc.

I'd also check into that UTI thing. In the meantime, pull ups (but let her keep her panties, too, so she feels wet).

[cheerfuldom]

Another option would be some plastic pants/undies OVER her other undies. Not as humiliating as a diaper but still some protection from the accidents. Even pullups might be a better option than a diaper.

BUT you are not wrong in taking action and not allowing her to have accidents all over the house.

[Unregistered]

I'm having this same issue with a 5 year old boy. I'll be following this thread

[newtodaycare22]

Thanks everyone. I may have reacted a little too sternly but I was just so frustrated about the lying. You guys are right though-she's probably being punished at home so even though I ask her to tell me, she thinks she's going to be scolded.

I talked to mom today and her eyes got big at the suggestion of a medical issue-She told me that she's been saying her pee pee hurts. Helllllooooo-information that woudl have been useful! love this Mom but she was clueless on this. She now has a doctor appt in the amhappyface