Hard Time Explaining The Difference To DCB

[DaisyMamma]

To start off with I'm not in the most pleasent mood. So take this with a grain of salt. I've always felt like my kids shouldn't be treated any different than daycare kids. I have a small group. Most of the time my children let the DC kids in there room. Sometimes the 2 year old needs time to himself and I'll have him spend time in my or his room with the door shut. They share every toy with these kids(there own choice). But sometimes DC children sneak a toy in and if someone else touches it(THAT"S MINE!!) THats MY MOM or THATS MY DAD at pick up. If we are playing outside DON"T GO BY MY CAR. I have a little boy who loves to try on my older kids sandles and boots, but if someone touches his shoes. Holy hell. These kids feel like every thing should be FAIR for them, but it never works both ways.

I run things very similar to you. I have only 7 kids or less at a time, 1-2 are mine. All the toys here are technically theirs, being that they are 3 and 6 years old. Anything special they don't want to share goes in their room. This rarely ever occurs. They can go in their rooms alone, or invite ALL the kids in. Special food treats and snacks are saved for after hours, because I do not allow outside food, everyone gets the same things. During daycare hours my children are allowed to go to friends houses, go to grandmas, etc. And I will even do the transportation. My children didn't ask to be in daycare, no, but neither did any of the other kids who are here. My kids do get some special treatment, but not with food. I would have allowed my child the breakfast sandwich, since the DCK wasn't in the car yet.

[karen]

I will be the bad guy with this one!!!!
First center I worked at the owner/director had her children enrolled. Well she used to give her children special treatment all the time. In front of all the day care kids. I remember one time in particular.... ice cream cones were brought in for her children. None for the day care kids. Her children sat and ate ice cream in front of every one! you can guess how upset I was. This was done on a regular basis..... I even said something about how unfair it was to the rest of the children that they didn't have ice cream. Well it was said to me that I needed to be more understanding because their mommy works here and they can't always have her. Of course my response was well these kids go all day without seeing their mommy when they fall their mommy isn't there to kiss away the tears or when they are upset their mommy isn't here to help thru the problem.
The next day I went out and bought all 26 kids cookies to have as a special treat. As a parent if I walked in on someones kids eating a special treat in front of my child I would be very upset. I just wonder if the tables were turned and you had your child in a day care and you walked in and all you heard about was how Johnny was eating ice cream and your child didn't get any how that would make you feel.
Sorry this is such a sore subject with me because I saw what it did to the other children....the kids even questioned me about it...."Why does Johnny have ice cream and we don't?" I feel everyone should be treated as equal as possible and after kids leave is plenty of time to do serious I LOVE YOU TIME with your kids. Now don't boo and hiss at me to much!

[Blackcat31]

I will be the bad guy with this one!!!!
First center I worked at the owner/director had her children enrolled. Well she used to give her children special treatment all the time. In front of all the day care kids. I remember one time in particular.... ice cream cones were brought in for her children. None for the day care kids. Her children sat and ate ice cream in front of every one! you can guess how upset I was. This was done on a regular basis..... I even said something about how unfair it was to the rest of the children that they didn't have ice cream. Well it was said to me that I needed to be more understanding because their mommy works here and they can't always have her. Of course my response was well these kids go all day without seeing their mommy when they fall their mommy isn't there to kiss away the tears or when they are upset their mommy isn't here to help thru the problem.
The next day I went out and bought all 26 kids cookies to have as a special treat. As a parent if I walked in on someones kids eating a special treat in front of my child I would be very upset. I just wonder if the tables were turned and you had your child in a day care and you walked in and all you heard about was how Johnny was eating ice cream and your child didn't get any how that would make you feel.
Sorry this is such a sore subject with me because I saw what it did to the other children....the kids even questioned me about it...."Why does Johnny have ice cream and we don't?" I feel everyone should be treated as equal as possible and after kids leave is plenty of time to do serious I LOVE YOU TIME with your kids. Now don't boo and hiss at me to much!

No Boos and Hisses here.....I would have done the same thing you did!!

The ice cream thing was way out of line in my opinion. I also think the OP's situation was much different as her child had the "food item" BEFORE the DCK was present so it wasn't like the OP let her child have something right in front of a DCK with the attitude the owner did in your scenario.

I raised my own children while doing child care and never in a million years would I have allowed them something like an ice cream cone or candy in front of the other kids. Mine knew they had to wait til Mommy was off work.

However, many times I had DCK's complain that my children got to go out for breakfast before coming to care and they didn't......that is more what I think OP is talking about.

Blatant disregard for DCK's over the supposed "right" of an owners child to have "special" while in the presence of other kids is simply mean in my opinion.

[Meeko]

I will be the bad guy with this one!!!!
First center I worked at the owner/director had her children enrolled. Well she used to give her children special treatment all the time. In front of all the day care kids. I remember one time in particular.... ice cream cones were brought in for her children. None for the day care kids. Her children sat and ate ice cream in front of every one! you can guess how upset I was. This was done on a regular basis..... I even said something about how unfair it was to the rest of the children that they didn't have ice cream. Well it was said to me that I needed to be more understanding because their mommy works here and they can't always have her. Of course my response was well these kids go all day without seeing their mommy when they fall their mommy isn't there to kiss away the tears or when they are upset their mommy isn't here to help thru the problem.
The next day I went out and bought all 26 kids cookies to have as a special treat. As a parent if I walked in on someones kids eating a special treat in front of my child I would be very upset. I just wonder if the tables were turned and you had your child in a day care and you walked in and all you heard about was how Johnny was eating ice cream and your child didn't get any how that would make you feel.
Sorry this is such a sore subject with me because I saw what it did to the other children....the kids even questioned me about it...."Why does Johnny have ice cream and we don't?" I feel everyone should be treated as equal as possible and after kids leave is plenty of time to do serious I LOVE YOU TIME with your kids. Now don't boo and hiss at me to much!

Just plain spiteful on the part of the center owner!

But I think the situation is a little different to the problem the OP is having.

I never, ever gave my own kids special treats like ice-cream in front of the DCK's. But...there were many times when my husband would take my girls shopping or to the movies or out for ice-cream etc. during the day care day and a few kids would complain about it not being fair. It was perfectly fair. They did special things with THEIR parents and my daughters didn't have to be invited too!

It sounds like the boy has decided that he gets everything the same as the son. He has to learn that he is a welcome addition in the home, but he is not family and doesn't get family special. That's just life.

[DaisyMamma]

I agree with you.