New Puppy...and DCG is Terrified!

[ILMommy]

I just moved into a house from a condo, and my family and I decided to get a puppy. We have a 10 week old Golden Retriever and she's been an angel with the daycare kids. I wanted a dog that would be great with kids, and I wanted the puppy to be raised with the kids right from the start. I let all the parents know about 3 weeks before we brought her home. Puppy spends the day with us in the basement; I have a play yard fence that she goes into when she's starts to get too rowdy. I also keep her on a leash sometimes, and she's not allowed to go in my "baby" area where the little one's play on the floor. She does great; I have an 8 month old that she knows to approach slowly and I let them on the floor together after hours.

My 2 year old DCG is terrified of the puppy, even though her parents had big dogs in the past. Mom warned me she might be a little scared "at first", but she has done nothing but scream and cry the entire time. Even when the puppy is sound asleep, she will still scream her head off if she sees her. I feel bad she's scared, and keep the puppy put in play yard or upstairs in her crate more when she's here, but it's important to me that the puppy learns how to be around children, which she can't if she's caged all day. I don't know what to do; my kids are in love with this puppy, she's so good with everyone and the other daycare kids and parents love her. I'm not getting rid of puppy, especially since dcg's mom is on the verge of getting fired from her job and she probably won't be here much longer anyway. But I don't know what to do at the moment. I try to work with her, but she gets too worked up crying and screaming. She is also afraid of many other things (loud noises, the vacuum, ect) but none to the extent of the puppy, although she will scream and cry if the vacuum is turned on. Has anyone else had this happen, or have suggestions?

[Heidi]

keep introducing the puppy slowly, and she will get used to it. Read books about dogs with pictures, find a stuffed puppy for her to pet...etc. Might be a good time to just do a whole "curriculum" on pets. If you have another adult in the house, have them bring the dog in for the kids to pet while you hold dcg at the other end of the room.

My sister enrolled a 4 yo hispanic boy last year who spoke no english AND was terrified of her 3 dogs. He's been there 6 months or so now, and LOVES her doggies.

Your dcg being only 2 makes it harder. Irrational fears can be very strong at this age YOu know, going down the bathtub drain, etc. They don't have any concept of relative size. So, puppy teeth may look monstrous to her. WHen he "smiles" he may seem to her to be leering. Who knows...maybe she sees his wet tongue and rolly body and thinks he's a furry monster...

I once had a girl who was terrified of anything overhead. Kites, airplanes, parking garages, etc. She just outgrew it.

[dEHmom]

I don't have any advice unfortunately on how to get this dcg accustomed to the dog, but I might suggest letting her see the dog playing with the other kids, and patting him, etc. While talking with the dcg just say, "nice puppy" "see he's our friend" etc. Definitely don't force her to be near the dog. Allow her to do it at her own pace.

I agree with pp about irrational fears, however, I am a firm believe that children generally have NO FEAR and fear is something that is taught, either from parents, family, friends, or experience. She may have a bad experience with a yellow puppy.

Vacuums are common triggers for young ones because they are loud, and if child is sitting on floor, sometimes the vacuums will blow air at them, which is scary. To them it's like a monster breathing on them! They do outgrow it the more they are around it.

[Kaddidle Care]

No advice but I want to see your puppy! Pictures please!!!

Goldens rock! happyface I have one too!

[dEHmom]

I had a golden for almost 3 yrs, gave him away in December I do miss him, but my life is peaceful without him. They are ALOT of work.

[Kaddidle Care]

D'OH! 3 is the PERFECT age for a Golden! But they are a sporting breed (read high activity) and not right for everyone. Usually by 3 they have calmed down and know what is expected of them.

Sounds like the OP has one from a good breeder that selected a calm pup knowing it would be around a lot of children.

My current Golden was a NIGHTMARE pup (can you say furry pirahna?)- he is pretty much perfect now. It was my fault - I asked for one with some spunk.

My first Golden was very much like the one she describes - a very gentle soul - all except for those wearing flip flops. He liked to get close.. VERY close and would step on your feet every time. He was very gentle with children and adored them.

[dEHmom]

D'OH! 3 is the PERFECT age for a Golden! But they are a sporting breed (read high activity) and not right for everyone. Usually by 3 they have calmed down and know what is expected of them.

Sounds like the OP has one from a good breeder that selected a calm pup knowing it would be around a lot of children.

My current Golden was a NIGHTMARE pup (can you say furry pirahna?)- he is pretty much perfect now. It was my fault - I asked for one with some spunk.

My first Golden was very much like the one she describes - a very gentle soul - all except for those wearing flip flops. He liked to get close.. VERY close and would step on your feet every time. He was very gentle with children and adored them.

He was very difficult. He had been through many rounds of obedience etc. Was an awesome dog when it was just us, but he constantly escaped (and we had pound bills to pay, and each time they double!). But when anyone came to the house he was so ridiculously crazy, without caesar millan we couldn't control him! He would jump on people just because he wanted to hug them. But he was constantly having allergic reactions (hot spots), and yeast infections in the ears, etc. He also started showing aggression to some people, and I had to decide whether to let him go, or close my daycare. He never bit or anything, but was very stubborn. I also knew that he just needed much more attention and care than we could possibly give him. It broke my heart letting him go, but he went to a home with other retrievers, and the lady was just perfect for him. He is now able to sleep on a bed (which he always wanted but dh would never allow it), and has 100% affection all day long.

He actually went to bite me one day when he stole a daycare kids lunch, and i went to grab it. Which was really not like him, so it terrified me. What if it was one of the kids he did that to?

[Kaddidle Care]

I don't blame you. While Goldens have a great reputation, there is one every now and then that isn't wired quite right. Which makes it worse because they do have such a good reputation.

Like I said before, they don't fit in everyone's lifestyle. I'm so glad you found a happy home for him.

To the OP - the only thing I can think of is once the child settles down, maybe she can help train the pup. Telling the pup to sit for a bit of cheese or veggie - that type of thing. It will help build her confidence with the pup and help you train her as well.

My first Golden was 3 when we had our first son. It was a breeze.

My 2nd Golden came into our family with a 5 & 15 year old. It was a whole other ball game. But.. my 5 year old helped me train him. It was an awesome experience for him.