Another Death Due To Co-Sleeping....

[AmyLeigh]

This is MY opinion only. I respect that others feel differently.



STATEMENT : "I co-slept with my baby and he/she was just fine."

SAME AS.....

STATEMENT: "My grandfather was a smoker and lived til he was 97, so
cigarettes are perfectly harmless."


In this case...the child was electrocuted. But death could easily have been suffocation as it sounds like the parents were not very responsible.

I was going to stay out of this until I read this comment. To compare cosleeping to toxic chemicals being inhaled into the body is extremely offensive to me.

[AmyLeigh]

I coslept and I did it safely.

There are safe and unsafe ways to cosleep. It is a very intimate, personal choice, and I was judged by people, and I was applauded by people.

I don't judge people for not cosleeping.

Me too!

[Childminder]

Always a heated topic.

This 3 month old child probably would not have died by "electrocution" if he had not been sleeping with mom.

I chose to not co-sleep for a number of reasons some of those being the amount of deaths of infants smothered in the parents bed around the time I had children, babies getting wedged between wall and bed, and babies falling out of parents beds to the floor.

Other reasons are that I chose to have a healthy sexual relationship with my husband and did not feel that we could if we were sharing our bed with our children. Also I like to sleep. It is one of my favorite hobbies::, if I'm sleeping with a child that doesn't lay still I don't get a good sleep and if I don't get sleep I'm a grouch. Another reason is that my husband and I wanted to go out on occasion and I could not expect nor did I want someone else to sleep with my child to get them to sleep.

I just read an article about SIDS and that they are finding that less infants die of SIDS in rooms with fans, particularly ceiling fans. Some babies lungs aren't strong enough to push their breath away and that they breathe in their own carbon dioxide and die. The fan acts as a way to move the air from their face. My son just had a co-worker that lost their son. He was sleeping in bed with both parents facing him and died because he was not breathing in oxygen, he was breathing their combined carbon dioxide.

Imo, you make the choice to co-sleep, I did not.

[Meeko]

I was going to stay out of this until I read this comment. To compare cosleeping to toxic chemicals being inhaled into the body is extremely offensive to me.

I didn't mean to offend...like I said...just MY opinion. There are risks with any activity and I didn't care to take the risk of co-sleeping with a baby.

And I'm sorry if this is TMI...but my husband and I have "spooned" since we were first married 31 years ago. Neither of us could imagine our relationship with a child lying between us. We have four children. We love them very much. But they will all be gone their own way one day and it will just be me and hubby. He is the most important person in my life. I can't imagine just having to wave at him from the other side of our bed LOL!!!

As for the toxic chemicals.......babies have died inhaling the carbon-dioxide produced by their own parents while sleeping.

So it's a personal decision. I choose not to.

[Heidi]

[QUOTE=Childminder;226791]Always a heated topic.

I chose to not co-sleep for a number of reasons some of those being the amount of deaths of infants smothered in the parents bed around the time I had children, babies getting wedged between wall and bed, and babies falling out of parents beds to the floor.

Other reasons are that I chose to have a healthy sexual relationship with my husband and did not feel that we could if we were sharing our bed with our children. Also I like to sleep. It is one of my favorite hobbies::, if I'm sleeping with a child that doesn't lay still I don't get a good sleep and if I don't get sleep I'm a grouch. Another reason is that my husband and I wanted to go out on occasion and I could not expect nor did I want someone else to sleep with my child to get them to sleep.[quote]

My motivation for not co-sleeping was the same as yours. I figured my kids were safer with me fully rested!

Each person has to decide what works best for them and their family. There is no "right" or "wrong" here. You can follow all the "rules" and something still happens, and then you feel like "see....I KNEW that wasn't right for us".

So...sleep with your child or dont, carry them around in a sack on your stomach until their 2...or don't. Breastfeed or bottle feed, cloth diapers or not...teach them to read when they're 12 months old if you feel you must.

Why does everthing have to be one way or another? I don't get it:confused::confused::confused:

PS: just dont bring them to MY daycare after you've co slept, slung, and breastfed them until they were 2.. ::

[AnneCordelia]

Do you sleep with exposed wire on extension cords around your metal bed frame? What if the crib had a metal frame and was touching exposed electrical wires? There are too many variables to say that if she hadn't been cosleeping it wouldn't have happened. Exposed electrical wires is a hazard in ANY sleeping situation.

[Heidi]

Do you sleep with exposed wire on extension cords around your metal bed frame? What if the crib had a metal frame and was touching exposed electrical wires? There are too many variables to say that if she hadn't been sleeping it wouldn't have happened. Exposed electrical wires is a hazard in ANY sleeping situation.

no kidding!

[SunshineMama]

I didn't mean to offend...like I said...just MY opinion. There are risks with any activity and I didn't care to take the risk of co-sleeping with a baby.

And I'm sorry if this is TMI...but my husband and I have "spooned" since we were first married 31 years ago. Neither of us could imagine our relationship with a child lying between us. We have four children. We love them very much. But they will all be gone their own way one day and it will just be me and hubby. He is the most important person in my life. I can't imagine just having to wave at him from the other side of our bed LOL!!!

As for the toxic chemicals.......babies have died inhaling the carbon-dioxide produced by their own parents while sleeping.

So it's a personal decision. I choose not to.

I have never heard of babies dying from their parents toxic carbon dioxide. I have heard that a mothers breath can actually prevent SIDS and help a baby to breathe. I attached an article about tht above. Do you have an article or scientific evidence showing that parents' breath causes children to die? I am very curious as to the source.

[Beach Baby]

I safely coslept with all three of my children. As a pp said, there are risks with any activity, and it is up to the parents to choose which risks they are willing to take. Personally, cosleeping was the only way I was able to get any decent amount of sleep when my kids were babies. It's something that came naturally to us, and we coslept for various amounts of time with each child, depending on what they needed and what worked for us. I would NEVER bash another person for their choice to cosleep or not, and I would never make them seem like a bad person for their choice, as some of the previous posters have. I agree with Heidi in that it doesn't need to be one way or another. What works best for us, may not work for you at all. That's the beauty of being a parent...you get to do what works best for you and your children. Perhaps if the baby would be in a crib, they would have been safer, as it certainly was a dangerous situation. There are ways to safely cosleep, and you know...cosleeping is not anything new, and certainly does not only pertain to us human animals. As parents, we need to do what feels right to us. We should also provide a safe environment for our children, which clearly these people did NOT do.

[JenNJ]

There are risks in everything.

Walking down a flight of steps is a gamble of life and death. My mother had a client who ended up in an assisted care facility at 36 years old from falling down the steps. She will never be home with her kids or husband again. She snapped her neck in five places and lives in a state of blinking to communicate.

Anyway, co-sleeping has benefits and risks. Just as anything else.

I chose to co-sleep with my kids. It was what came naturally. I believe it saved my son's life. I woke up startled one night and found him blue in the face and not breathing. I quickly picked him up and gave him a hard smack on the back and started calling his name loudly. He opened his eyes and gasped for air after about a minute. What would have happened if he was in his crib? I have no idea, but the thought sends shivers down my spine.

Only deaths and accidents are reported from co-sleeping. Not incidents like mine. So really even studies can't back up how safe or unsafe it is. Like anything relating to children, accidents happen, people do it irresponsibly and carelessly, and sometimes tragedy occurs.

[Unregistered]

The baby was "wedged between the wall and the mom." That does have something to do with co-sleeping.

[Beach Baby]

This obviously was not a good fit for cosleeping. Something went wrong, and without knowing the whole truth of the situation, we will never know every single detail of what happened. YES, if the baby would have been in a crib, the baby would probably be alive. Does this mean that cosleeping is a horrible thing? How many babies die in their cribs from SIDS or suffocation or any other reason? Does that mean that cribs are horrible and no baby should ever be put in a crib? Of course not. It all depends on the situation. Common sense SHOULD tell you that you should not have a space between the mattress and the wall where the baby can become wedged. Lack of a safe cosleeping environment is why this baby died. Not cosleeping itself.

[cheerfuldom]

I think the OP said co sleeping because had the baby been in a crib or bassinet it wouldn't have happened? Just a though...

Babies should not be put to sleep near space heaters and frayed cords....its sounds to me like this could have happen in a crib, unfortunately. If the parents are comfortable with this environment for an infant, it is likely that the rest of the home wasnt very safe either.

[cheerfuldom]

Sorry but there is NEVER a safe way to co sleep. So many babies die from this.

I'd be happy to send your information outlining the benefits of co-sleeping, or room sharing (baby is not in the bed but in the same room as parents). There ARE ways to be safe. AND there are many babies, unfortunately, that die from unsafe crib sleeping as well.

I realize its a hot topic. We have co-slept. I have no problem with people choosing to do something else but I do have a problem with people that paint all co-sleepers with the same brush and make rash generalization such as the above. I hope that this thread can help us see other views and hesitate before making judgments on ALL parents that chose to co-sleep....or even on ALL parents that chose not to.

[Meeko]

I have never heard of babies dying from their parents toxic carbon dioxide. I have heard that a mothers breath can actually prevent SIDS and help a baby to breathe. I attached an article about tht above. Do you have an article or scientific evidence showing that parents' breath causes children to die? I am very curious as to the source.

See Childminder's post earlier today.

I have read over the years that babies need lots of oxygen. Not easily found sandwiched between their parents who are both breathing out a blanket of carbon-dioxide.

The bottom line for me is that EVERY SINGLE parent who has ever lost a baby due to co-sleeping, NEVER, EVER thought it could happen to them. They truly believed their baby was safe beside them.

But it happened anyway.

It will continue to happen anyway to parents who never thought it could possibly happen to their baby.

I don't care to risk it. What other people feel is an acceptable risk is up to them. I simply could not live with myself if it was me.