Article on Potty Training at Daycare

[SunshineMama]

No wonder parents have rediculous expectations:

This is one of the first articles I found when looking for how to potty train in a daycare setting:

http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/potty-training-at-daycare.html

[Blackcat31]

Other than the condescending tone of the author, as if daycare providers are the employed staff of a parent, this article is actually GREAT!!

I would much prefer a parent took the lead and potty trained their own child. The article said nothing about wearing underpants without a protective cover or going pull-up free nor did it direct parents to demand that providers take their child to the toilet every 20-30 minutes. (which IME, is the most common expectation or complaint from a parent).

The article said every 2 hours and it said IF POSSIBLE, which to me was very respectful of the fact that the provider has other things going on during the day. It also said to not push the child and to use postive praise. All of which are wonderful ideas. It also said the provider should encourage the child to use self-help skills and dress and undress themselves with encouragment which is awesome!

I also really liked that it directed the parent to be involved, take charge and ask for feedback...nothing worse than a parent who sits back and waits for you to do their job....kwim?

All in all, I thought the article was actually very helpful and ALL parents should read it and tweak it to fit their care situation.

[DBug]

No wonder parents have rediculous expectations:

This is one of the first articles I found when looking for how to potty train in a daycare setting:

http://www.dummies.com/how-to/conten...t-daycare.html

Oh my, that is crazy unrealistic! In my situation, I tell parents how I do things here, not the other way around. I do as much as I can to encourage potty training, but I would NOT accept a page of "instructions" on how to potty train one of my dck's. I ask how dcp's are doing things at home, I make the bathroom as accessible as possible, etc., etc., but I would be incredibly offended if a parent were to assume that I don't know how to help a child who is in the middle of training.

Luckily, the parents of the trainers I've had have always tailored their at-home training to fit with my schedule during the dc day. They've used pull-ups or waterproof covers over underwear, and they've always assumed ultimate responsibility for training their kids.

I think the author of that article needs to work in a daycare for a week and then rewrite it!

[cheerfuldom]

I have my potty policy in my parent contract. If the parents need to provide me instructions, I guess I am okay with that as long as it fits with my already existing policy. I dont do "naked time", longs sits on the potty, pottying every 15 minutes, sitting on a potty in front of the TV, underwear from day one and other current trends with parents and potty training. It is not that big of a deal and 99% of kids will learn quickly if they are ready and everyone is consistent. My biggest annoyance is parents wanting to potty train WAY before kids are ready. Starting at 18 months or younger with kids that have no verbal skills, no coordination for dressing, no desire to try and are right in the middle of tantrums and testing. Yes some kids train young but most don't before 2.

[SunshineMama]

Blackcat- I do agree that it is important to have the children and parents take responibility for potty training, and that parent involvement is super!

When I read the article I got the impression that it instructed parents to basically "tell" the daycare center or provider what exactly to do, which realistically does not work. Can you imagine potty training multiple children according to each family's own instructions? In a home setting, the provider would burn out and I do not know of a center who would do that. Most centers that I know of just plain won't allow children to go to the next class up until they are trained.

Perhaps if it instructed the parents to "share" what they do at home and formulate a plan together, or even (gasp) get the parents on the DAYCARE'S potty schedule. The kids are at daycare more than at home, but there are lots of fun distractions, friends, etc.

And honestly, I find myself working harder than the parents pertaining to daycare (IMHO). I highly doubt the parents are taking their kids to the potty every weekend and evening every 2 hours like we do.

The overall tone to me just seemed like it was asking for the same kind of care that you would get from a nanny, not from a group care provider.

Just my opinion

[SilverSabre25]

I also wasn't thrilled with the article's instruction to "tell the caregiver AFTER the potty training weekend." I would rather it had the parents discussing it AHEAD of time with the caregiver and at least saying, "Hey, this is what we're going to try, how can this work for you?" and making it into a discussion.

[Blackcat31]

@Sunshine Mama....nope, you are exactly right....we are on the same pagem just coming from different directions..
I too found the overall tone of the author VERY condescending and suggestive of the parent to TELL their provider how things should be done, but all in all I find that IME, parents SHOULD take the initiative and be the leader in how their child is trained.

Parents know their child best and taking the active leader role is ideal in my opinon. As long as it fits into my day, I will gladly use whatever method a parent chooses.
My contract says "It is the parents responsibility to start and continue and complete the toilet training process. I will assist in any way that my schedule allows."

I even like the list idea. I wouldn't take it at face value and do everything on it, but I would really like and appreciate a parent that took the time to write down exactly what they have going on at home. I think it shows willingness to be a partner.

As most providers know, it would only take a couple hours to figure out if the parent was really doing that at home or not.

If they are being truthful and honest then I would ABSOLUTELY support them as many many parents now days don't take the leadership role with their children. We have far to many vents on here proving that.

[SunshineMama]

I even like the list idea. I wouldn't take it at face value and do everything on it, but I would really like and appreciate a parent that took the time to write down exactly what they have going on at home. I think it shows willingness to be a partner.

As most providers know, it would only take a couple hours to figure out if the parent was really doing that at home or not.

If they are being truthful and honest then I would ABSOLUTELY support them as many many parents now days don't take the leadership role with their children. We have far to many vents on here proving that.

So true!

[Texasjeepgirl]

I have my potty policy in my parent contract. If the parents need to provide me instructions, I guess I am okay with that as long as it fits with my already existing policy. I dont do "naked time", longs sits on the potty, pottying every 15 minutes, sitting on a potty in front of the TV, underwear from day one and other current trends with parents and potty training. It is not that big of a deal and 99% of kids will learn quickly if they are ready and everyone is consistent. My biggest annoyance is parents wanting to potty train WAY before kids are ready. Starting at 18 months or younger with kids that have no verbal skills, no coordination for dressing, no desire to try and are right in the middle of tantrums and testing. Yes some kids train young but most don't before 2.

can I say
DITTO???? EVERY WORD YOU SAID

[littlemissmuffet]

This is my house, my daycare. Nobody tells me how to run things... trust me. My parents know this from day one, they also know how I approach potty training from day one... so if anyone walked in here giving me instructions they would be met a final warning.

I know parents generally have their child's best interest at heart but I deal with more children in one year than most parents will deal with in their entire lives. I am a CHILDCARE PROVIDER - I am more than capable of successfully assisting with potty training without being told how. :: Also, some of the ways that first time parents go about potty training is completely unrealistic - especially in a daycare setting. They read books - I have real experience.

If a parent asks for advice on parenting, I provide my professional opinion. Even though I don't agree with many of the things my DCPs do while parenting I certainly don't instruct them (though I wish I could)... and they would be completely offended and angry if I did.

[saved4always]

At the beginning of the article, the author was very condescending in her attitude about the caregiver's opinions. I totally exptected to be really upset with the handout because of her attitude in the first paragraphs, but when I got to that part, it was actually okay. Like Blackcat said, there was none of that taking the child to the bathroom every 20 or 30 minutes and there was no mention made of insisting on them wearing underwear before they stop having accident. Those are the 2 things I have had parents try to insist on that just do not jive with my home.

[cheerfuldom]

@Sunshine Mama....nope, you are exactly right....we are on the same pagem just coming from different directions..
I too found the overall tone of the author VERY condescending and suggestive of the parent to TELL their provider how things should be done, but all in all I find that IME, parents SHOULD take the initiative and be the leader in how their child is trained.

Parents know their child best and taking the active leader role is ideal in my opinon. As long as it fits into my day, I will gladly use whatever method a parent chooses.
My contract says "It is the parents responsibility to start and continue and complete the toilet training process. I will assist in any way that my schedule allows."

I even like the list idea. I wouldn't take it at face value and do everything on it, but I would really like and appreciate a parent that took the time to write down exactly what they have going on at home. I think it shows willingness to be a partner.

As most providers know, it would only take a couple hours to figure out if the parent was really doing that at home or not.

If they are being truthful and honest then I would ABSOLUTELY support them as many many parents now days don't take the leadership role with their children. We have far to many vents on here proving that.

I agree! I am more than happy to work with parents that take the initiative. My issue is that most parents dump the entire deal on the provider and seem confused when their kid isnt ready for underwear in a week. I am more than happy to discuss with hands-on parents and tweak their plan and my plan to match.....what I dont want is the parents plan to be "have my kid trained in a week" and them not have any actual steps in place to get there. Or worse, say they are trying at home and you know for sure that they put their kids in diapers the minute they get home, basically sabotaging the work done at daycare. I dont do a thing till parents start at home. Nothing brings them to reality faster than a weekend doing it on their own. Have had several instances where parents were gung-ho to try, tried for one weekend or so at home and then came back on Monday with "I see now JR. isnt ready and we will try again in 6 months"

[Texasjeepgirl]

This is my house, my daycare. Nobody tells me how to run things... trust me. My parents know this from day one, they also know how I approach potty training from day one... so if anyone walked in here giving me instructions they would be met a final warning.

I know parents generally have their child's best interest at heart but I deal with more children in one year than most parents will deal with in their entire lives. I am a CHILDCARE PROVIDER - I am more than capable of successfully assisting with potty training without being told how. :: Also, some of the ways that first time parents go about potty training is completely unrealistic - especially in a daycare setting. They read books - I have real experience.

If a parent asks for advice on parenting, I provide my professional opinion. Even though I don't agree with many of the things my DCPs do while parenting I certainly don't instruct them (though I wish I could)... and they would be completely offended and angry if I did.

Very well said.. word for word... I agreee a million percent on all points...
I'm 45 years old.. I have 5 daughters... (2 that I gave birth to)... and now a 16 month old grand daughter... and...this is my 20th year of daycare...
I am ASTONISHED that parents do not comprehend... I have been doing this for 20 years people... I've got it.. thanks...

[cheerfuldom]

Very well said.. word for word... I agreee a million percent on all points...
I'm 45 years old.. I have 5 daughters... (2 that I gave birth to)... and now a 16 month old grand daughter... and...this is my 20th year of daycare...
I am ASTONISHED that parents do not comprehend... I have been doing this for 20 years people... I've got it.. thanks...

parents are lucky to have a provider with so much experience! unfortunately, that is more rare I would think. I know in my town many of the women doing childcare start when their kids are born and they dont have any more experience than first time parents. Many home daycares do not last long (didnt I hear that the average was two years?). Since a lot of parents consider their providers as "just babysitters", they probably dont even think to work with them together on potty training. I know a lot of the facilities in my area hire college age girls with no real life experience. All this to say, that not every parent as the option of turning to someone with a lot of hands-on kid experience for things like this. Your daycare parents are LUCKY to have you and your wealth of knowledge!!

[Texasjeepgirl]

parents are lucky to have a provider with so much experience! unfortunately, that is more rare I would think. I know in my town many of the women doing childcare start when their kids are born and they dont have any more experience than first time parents. Many home daycares do not last long (didnt I hear that the average was two years?). Since a lot of parents consider their providers as "just babysitters", they probably dont even think to work with them together on potty training. I know a lot of the facilities in my area hire college age girls with no real life experience. All this to say, that not every parent as the option of turning to someone with a lot of hands-on kid experience for things like this. Your daycare parents are LUCKY to have you and your wealth of knowledge!!

Wow...thanks for the compliment..... I started my daycare when my oldest daughter was 2 years old...so I was exactly one of those providers that you mentioned... first time mom... didn't know anything more than most of my clients...
But... 2 years later I had a second daughter... 10 years ago I married hubby #2.. with 3 daughters...and... now... 20 years after I first opened my doors... I honestly DO NOT KNOW how many children I've had go through my daycare... sometimes I wish I had kept all my enrollement records over the years so I could count them all up...
I know this.. I've been LICENSED for 11 years now... .. max capacity is 12...and I'm usually always full house...
Lots and lots of diapers... and... many...many potty trained children ...