Fixations

[Hunni Bee]

I posted a couple days ago about a four year old dcb who had a meltdown because he couldn't use a certain bathroom. Many of the posters suggested that he wants privacy and that particular bathroom provides the most. I agreed and still do that that is probably part of it.

But it got me thinking about this dcb's day, and I realize he fixates on some other things as well. They include:

•A toy train. He plays with it for hours everyday. If someone else gets it first, he attempts to take it from them and when of course he can't, he throws a tantrum. He will not accept other toys as substitutes.

•A little girl. He has what seems like a crush on one of the dcgs. He wants to sit beside her allll the time, and gets angry if he can't. Repeats her name over and over. If she's absent, constantly asks about her. Follows her everywhere.

•Certain random activities, like getting his coat on. He'll ask to get his coat on (not leave, just put the coat on) a million times. Then when I finally.ask him to put it on, he repeats "its time to put my coat on???" over and over, then drags it out to take 5 to 10 minutes.

He always holds his private part all the time, picks/pulls the skin on his lip, and makes repetitive noises A LOT.

I'm not listing this things in a complaining way (I hope it doesn't seem that way). I just always accepted this things (with some exasperation) as character quirks, but now Im starting to see a pattern.

Should i be concerned?

[cheerfuldom]

wow....I would be concerned. Sounds like the majority of his day is focused towards a very narrow list of activities and that is always concerning. have you talked to his mom? will he be starting school next year?

[Hunni Bee]

Cheerfuldom,

I have talked to mom about some of the behaviors individually, but not as a pattern. She's a "oh okay" type mom, but I think she does talk to him about it, which doesn't really help with fixations though.

HE has a December birthday, so he'll miss the kindergarten deadline. He can go to pre-k though, but I doubt his mom will send him if she doesn't have to.

[familyschoolcare]

I would be slightly concerned. I would ask mom to talk to doc. about these things as an overall pattern and maybe write down a complete list for her to

take to the doc. If you do write a list take your time and make sure it is objective must like the list here, just the facts not how it make you feel, how

if makes him feel, how it negatively effects the daycare ect. That way the doctor has a cmpleete picture and if you keep the list objective then the

doc. and the parent will not think you are trying to label the child "difficult"

[Blackcat31]

Do you have preschool screenings in your area? I would suggest to the mom that he have an evaluation or screening done.

If I were you, I would document the behaviors you mentioned in your OP and have them included in his evaluation.

A specialist in the field will definitely be able to tell the mom if her child NEEDS pre-k or if his odd behaviors are within the normal range.

Best to find out now while he has the opportunity to attend a pre-k program which could be helpful to him. Also we all know early interventionis best. Whether needed or not, it is at least a good thing to find out sooner than later.

[MizzCheryl]

Sounds like some ocd tendencies.
Picking skin is something I have seen in alot of kids that have special issues. All that I have had have wound up being put on Meds (not that I agreed with the meds).
Do his parents communicate with you well?
Many times kids don't get the extra help they need.
Funny....
My husband picks at his lip when he is thinking.