Repeating

[MsMe]

When any of my DCks ask something of me (I want a drink, can I put on a costume, ect) if I don't respond instantly....they say it again, and, again, and again.....even if I was going to do what they asked there is NO way I could have possibly even responded before they had already asked four times.

It drives ma batty.


We do have tabe manners (raise your hand to speak and head down to get up) but in the last couple of month even those have been being ignored (by kids that know them)

How do I stop this? I have tried ignoring, and if you ask more than once it is NO for sure.

[Hunni Bee]

I struggle with this daily, especially at mealtimes...ignoring does NOT work, it seems to make it worse.

[cheerfuldom]

I just tell them "you ask once and then you wait for an answer" and then make them wait. Its an ongoing battle sometimes.

[Michael]

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=repeating+child

[nannyde]

I call this talking "terms of engagment"

See these

https://www.daycare.com/forum/search.php?searchid=1469427

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I have one triplet who seeks out attention on this manner. She simply needs the attention.

[WImom]

I have three out of my eight that do this. It drives me batty too!!

[Countrygal]

Just another "difference" in how children are being raised. It used to be that interrupting an adult was rude. Especially if they had told you "just a minute" or something similar. As a kid, interrupting adults was a hard one for me to learn because I was basically an only child (my sibs were all grown and gone). But I remember my parents really coming down on me frequently for it. Now I stand and watch parents trying to talk to me while their children are literally pulling on them, calling them, climbing on them, etc, etc. When I tell them to "please wait, your momma is talking and you musn't interrupt" I am looked at like I am an alien from another country!

[Heidi]

Just another "difference" in how children are being raised. It used to be that interrupting an adult was rude. Especially if they had told you "just a minute" or something similar. As a kid, interrupting adults was a hard one for me to learn because I was basically an only child (my sibs were all grown and gone). But I remember my parents really coming down on me frequently for it. Now I stand and watch parents trying to talk to me while their children are literally pulling on them, calling them, climbing on them, etc, etc. When I tell them to "please wait, your momma is talking and you musn't interrupt" I am looked at like I am an alien from another country!

Yeah! I've gotten that look for the same reason! and maybe for a few other times...

[Crystal]

When any of my DCks ask something of me (I want a drink, can I put on a costume, ect) if I don't respond instantly....they say it again, and, again, and again.....even if I was going to do what they asked there is NO way I could have possibly even responded before they had already asked four times.

It drives ma batty.


We do have tabe manners (raise your hand to speak and head down to get up) but in the last couple of month even those have been being ignored (by kids that know them)

How do I stop this? I have tried ignoring, and if you ask more than once it is NO for sure.

I think children who do this need to be taught not to do it. They aren't going to learn by simply ignoring it. Each time it happens, I would kneel down to eye level and very matter-of-factly state, I heard you ask, I need you to wait now. Then finish whatever it was you were doing and then give them whatever it was. In time they will learn the concept of delayed gratification.

As far as table manners....., and please do not take offense to this....I think your "rules" are a bit innapropriate for young children. I allow talking quietly at the table.....not playing or yelling, but pleasant social conversation is not only allowed, but encouraged. When they are finished eating, they tell me and then they clear their plates/cups, go wash up and then play quietly in the playroom.....I see no reason to make them wait for the rest of the group to finish or to lay their head on the table. We do expect certain manners......please, thank you, no burping/passing gas at the table, excuse me, etc. All within what is developmentally appropriate for the individual child.

[Ariana]

Kids like this are "trained" to repeat because it's the only way to get the attention of the adults at home. They don't seem to realise that someone will respond to them after the first try at daycare!!

I simply tell them to "wait and only ask once". I will also say "I've heard your request and you need to wait and be patient". It works for me but I do have to say it a few times a day.

I have one little girl who has verbal diarrhea and says my name 50 gazillion times a day. She has a running narrative of all of her actions which begins by saying my name. My niece is the same way. I think it's a very compulsive behavior that comes from anxiety.

[MsMe]

As far as table manners....., and please do not take offense to this....I think your "rules" are a bit innapropriate for young children. I allow talking quietly at the table.....not playing or yelling, but pleasant social conversation is not only allowed, but encouraged. When they are finished eating, they tell me and then they clear their plates/cups, go wash up and then play quietly in the playroom.....I see no reason to make them wait for the rest of the group to finish or to lay their head on the table. We do expect certain manners......please, thank you, no burping/passing gas at the table, excuse me, etc. All within what is developmentally appropriate for the individual child.

Our table manners work for our group. I have 12 Daycare children that all eat together. When I said they raise their hand to "talk" I ment they have to raise their hand to ask for seconds, or condiments. They raise their hand wait to have my attention and say "May I have more XYZ. Please." They are allowed and encouraged to talk to eachother during the meal (maybe the way I worded my post it looked like they were allowed to talk at all, I should have been more clear).

We also do heads down when finished to cut out the "I'm done, I'm done. Can I get down?, I'm done!!! That gets out of control FAST with 12kids. A childs head down means they are finished and they are allowed up from the table seconds later. They do not have to wait for the whole group to be done. I don't consider these "rules" they are table manners that every child should have and all of my DCF use them at home as well.

Sorry I was not clear in my post.

[Crystal]

Our table manners work for our group. I have 12 Daycare children that all eat together. When I said they raise their hand to "talk" I ment they have to raise their hand to ask for seconds, or condiments. They raise their hand wait to have my attention and say "May I have more XYZ. Please." They are allowed and encouraged to talk to eachother during the meal (maybe the way I worded my post it looked like they were allowed to talk at all, I should have been more clear).

We also do heads down when finished to cut out the "I'm done, I'm done. Can I get down?, I'm done!!! That gets out of control FAST with 12kids. A childs head down means they are finished and they are allowed up from the table seconds later. They do not have to wait for the whole group to be done. I don't consider these "rules" they are table manners that every child should have and all of my DCF use them at home as well.

Sorry I was not clear in my post.

I see. That makes more sense to me! Sorry if I seemed judgmental....it was not my intent.

I serve 12-14 each meal too....I know how much work it can be

[nannyde]

We also do heads down when finished to cut out the "I'm done, I'm done. Can I get down?, I'm done!!! That gets out of control FAST with 12kids. A childs head down means they are finished and they are allowed up from the table seconds later.

It's GOOD for children to have time every day where they just be STILL. That's a perfect opportunity for them to rest and "take in".

Good system that nets you better behavior at the table, kids pacing their meals, and a reflection/rest time while you watch and wait for your peers. That will serve them very well when they are in long lines, waiting at the grocery store for their turn, waiting for their teacher to come check their work etc.