I'm Tore :(..Help Me Decide!

[NiNi.R.]

I've had a client for the last 3 years with two daughters ages 4&7. On and off over the years she is constantly pushing my buttons, trying to find loop pulls in the contract, wanting me to do things for her children that she should herself,etc. The list is endless on this parent. Her daughters however are actually pretty well behaved. The youngest this fall will be in preschool from 8-11 and the oldest of course will be in school all day.

I know part of the parent's behavior is my fault as I didn't have a backbone in the beginning back when I first started. "You teach people how to treat you"...right? But I'm ready to get one now...I've had enough!

Right now I'm at a cross roads. Over the weekend I had a parent contact me for summer care of her two SAs. These are children that I watched when they were babes til their mama became a stay at home mom the last year before they went to school. She is back to work now and needs someone to care for them during the summer months. Without hesitation told her I would. This would make me completely full this summer.

Then I realized that this could give me the flexibility to do away with the first family I mentioned and give me plenty of time to find a replacement without being to hard on the check book if you know what I mean. Doing away with this family would not only cut the stress but also my working hours a week from 60 to 50 and that's being generous.

I figure I have 2 options.

1. Give her a new handbook. A 10 hour day maximum no exceptions. Her children will need to arrive dressed, clean, and ready to play, no exceptions. These things itself may piss her off so bad she finds a different daycare as I really don't think she would be able to find someone to have her children picked up by 4:30pm

2. Go ahead and tell her that I will no longer be able to provide care for her as of June 1. Then I can use the summer to find replacement care.

Any advice?

[cheerfuldom]

Are you willing to keep them if the mom agrees to the changes? Dont offer a new contract to her if you are secretly hoping she leaves either way. If you really would rather just have them off to a new provider, change your hours, give the mom the termination notice and a short, short explanation (if you must) that your hours are changing and that you wont be able to accomodate her family anymore. Dont get into any sort of discussion with her if you have decided that you arent taking them no matter what. I think you have to figure out first what you are and are not willing to do. Also, I think June is too much notice. There could be a lot of drama and such before then. If you just want to term them, I would wait until beginning or mid May to give notice.

[Unregistered]

to be honest i say you tell that mom you can no longer watch them starting summer we as daycare providers put up with so much BS, you deserve to be stress free and your business your rules, your money. life is too short to stress over, who knows you may find a good family who appreciates you =) good luck

[NiNi.R.]

Are you willing to keep them if the mom agrees to the changes? Dont offer a new contract to her if you are secretly hoping she leaves either way. If you really would rather just have them off to a new provider, change your hours, give the mom the termination notice and a short, short explanation (if you must) that your hours are changing and that you wont be able to accomodate her family anymore. Dont get into any sort of discussion with her if you have decided that you arent taking them no matter what. I think you have to figure out first what you are and are not willing to do. Also, I think June is too much notice. There could be a lot of drama and such before then. If you just want to term them, I would wait until beginning or mid May to give notice.

I will be sad as I've watched these girls for a long time. Seeing them go will be hard. My daughter 3 is best buds with the 4 yr old dcg. So I know she will have a rough transition time also. However I know the relief I will feel when the stress is gone will be worth it. I just got to muster up the courage to term. As well as get my husband on board who thinks I need give her the opportunity to conform to the new policies since she has been a client for so long.

[Sunchimes]

Being a client for a long time isn't a good thing if she was a bad client all that time. I recently learned a valuable lesson about keeping a stressful situation just because you love the little one.

I agree with the poster that said to evaluate what you would do if she accepted the new terms. If she agrees to shorter hours, etc, would you be happy? Do you think she would follow them if she agreed to them? If the answers are yes, then try it. You could always term them if she breaks the agreement.

[NiNi.R.]

I don't think she will ever quit complaining. Any issues I've ever had with a parent have always revolved around her. So after weighing the pros and cons with my husband we decided to term. I know I will be so much better off! Thanks for the advice!

[wdmmom]

Here's what I see happening:

You give DCM a new contract with the specifics lined out, she'll go out of her way to make you mad other ways and she'll do it intentionally. She'll seek out the loop holes in the new contract too.

What you have here is an entitled parent.

I would hand her notice May 1st that come June 1st, you will no longer be able to accommodate the needs of this family.

When she asks what that means, simply tell her that you are changing your work hours and working with clients that specifically need 10 or less hours of care per day and can meet the 430pm pick up time.