DCG Refuses To Talk To Me

[SilverSabre25]

I don't do a lot of forced pleases, thank-you's or sorry's either. Most of mine say it automatically, but if they say "Ms. _____, may I have some more corn?" without the "please", its good enough for me, as long as they say it in a nice tone. If they say it in a demanding way, I just say "I don't think that's the way we ask." and they change it.

Yes, this!

It *is* possible to be polite without saying please.

[smb757]

I'm big on manners. I use please and thank you a lot and often prompt my dcks to use them as well. In fact, I am often complimented on my own children's manners. I have one dcb who is 4. When he started he would constantly complain about lunch. He only wanted hot dogs, Mac & cheese, canned ravioli, etc. But, I explained to him that while it was okay to say he didn't care for certain things, it was not okay to say things were gross or nasty. I explained to him that he certainly was not required to eat lunch & would take his plate of he continued. (I didn't feel bad about it because he leaves at 12:30). In the 6 months he's been with me, he has made vast improvements. He now tries his fruits & veggie without me even asking!!

[spud912]

I usually say "how do you ask nicely?" when the children demand things. That's enough to prompt "may I please . . . ?" Usually they say "thank you," but they sometimes need a "what do you say?" prompt. I also require a "yes, please" or a "no thank you" when I ask them a yes/no question.

I am very big on manners here and am proud to say my kiddos have come a long way! It usually takes a month to change any behavior.

[MrsB]

Please tell me more about this...it sounds adorable! And like a idea I may want to try.


I don't do a lot of forced pleases, thank-you's or sorry's either. Most of mine say it automatically, but if they say "Ms. _____, may I have some more corn?" without the "please", its good enough for me, as long as they say it in a nice tone. If they say it in a demanding way, I just say "I don't think that's the way we ask." and they change it.

Well, its nothing really that involved its just there are a few voices that I do that the kids have always responded too and see it has kind of just evolved into this thing we do.

robot - talk in a monotone voice, do stiff arm movements. Robot is really good at pleases and thank yous and your welcolmes. When I hear lots of them I will speed very quickly and talk in a monotone voice quickly giving lots of praises. If I here a demand or I want instead of may i. I start to sloooow down.
old lady w/english accent - she practices proper table ettiquete. sit up straight, napkin on your lap, bottoms on chairs, using forks and spoons not fingers. Like say if i start to see them start to get antsy I will start to slow down the food making process and hold my back "oowwwch"
Donald duck voice - he practices saying nice things to people and giving compliments. This one is a little less involved. But I give random compliments at the lunch table in my donald duck voice. Like "Emma you look really pretty in your red shirt today" or " Michael I enjoyed building a castle with you today" The kids really try to start doing their own too. one time one of my 3 year olds said to one of my fit throwers. "Johnnie I am glad you didnt have to sit on the thinking chair today"

You can't just do it the whole lunch time or even everyday though and you can't do it on request either, they will become obsessed with it and totally lose the point. When they say "do the robot" I always say " I dont know what your talking about" So I make it seem like these characters are taking over my body and I dont have any control over it. Its fun too, to ask them about the character. They will tell you everything about each one.

It might be easier to start out with just one, and work on that one for a few weeks. Then when you add the second character they will learn to keep a heads up as to what type of lesson they are supposed to learn from this character.