Logged Out- Do You Allow Parents....

[Unregistered]

Logged out for privacy, and changing slight details since parents are on this site often...

Hypothetical:

Children's parents are teachers. Children have been home all summer, and it is 2 weeks before they are scheduled to come back. Parents have dropped children off periodically throughout the summer for a day at a time or so, and paid a daily rate, so they could get things done around the house.

Parent calls and leaves voicemail that she would like to bring her children over for a play date for a few hours. Parent wants to come too. (No discussion of compensation for my time).

Would you allow this? The kids ALWAYS act different when any other person besides me is in the home, and I am afraid that they will go nuts and then the parents will not want to bring them back, like this is some kind of try out or test or something. They screwed their last provider and told her that they would be back after summer break- had her hold a spot for them all summer long, and then changed to me, after hiring me 3 months in advance and giving me a deposit. They didnt tell her because they wanted to keep her incase things didnt work out with me. I am just afraid that will happen to me, and I need the income so badly! I did not have them pay a fee while they were gone, and my family suffered severely. We ate through $5,000 in savings while they were gone!

What would you do if you were me?

[Blackcat31]

would I allow the play date? or would I allow the parents to attend the play date too? or would I take the kids on as daycare kids?

It is or isn't a hypothetical situation?

I must not have had enough coffee yet as I don't understand what you are asking. :confused: ::

[MamaBear]

I'm confused too

If your asking about a playdate is a good idea during daycare hours WITH the mom there too? Thats weird. I'd say no. I'd let the kid come and make her pay you for the time they are there though.

Thats pretty screwed up what the DCM did to the other daycare provider. And she might be doing the same to you. I wouldn't hold any type of space for her. Fill it with a reliable honest family.

[daycare]

I had a parent ask this before NO way. Please don't learn the hard way like I did.

I was stupid enough to allow it. I am the Queen of mistakes.

NO WAY JOSE NOT EVER...

I am childcare, not a meeting place for parents or a playdate group. No Parents.

I have had parents in the past ask again and I just tell them that because of my LIC and state regulations that I can't allow for it. If they really want to, I will need for them to:

1. get finger prints, wait for clearance
2. successfully complete 20 hours of safety and health training
3. Infant and child CPR ? First Aid
4. Complete back ground investigation through state and CPS
5. Purchase extended insurance to cover them while on my property

THis is what any adult would need to have in order to be around my DCK. Don't care who you are....

[MrsB]

I had a parent ask this before NO way. Please don't learn the hard way like I did.

I was stupid enough to allow it. I am the Queen of mistakes.

NO WAY JOSE NOT EVER...

I am childcare, not a meeting place for parents or a playdate group. No Parents.

I have had parents in the past ask again and I just tell them that because of my LIC and state regulations that I can't allow for it. If they really want to, I will need for them to:

1. get finger prints, wait for clearance
2. successfully complete 20 hours of safety and health training
3. Infant and child CPR ? First Aid
4. Complete back ground investigation through state and CPS
5. Purchase extended insurance to cover them while on my property

THis is what any adult would need to have in order to be around my DCK. Don't care who you are....

What a play date? Never really had that one, not unless it was another provider that I was friends with. We get our daycare kids together sometimes for field trips or special projects. Does this person have children the same age as yours? If not that is totally weird, IMO of course: That tells me they want to socialize their children in a daycare environment but dont want to pay for it. If so, and your children enjoy their children, do it off daycare hours.

Are you concerned that a family you tell no to a play date will terminate for that reason? Hmmmm, if a parent terms for that reason, I would be really sketchy that they wouldn't want to abide by my rules or that they think my rules are negotiable.

[MarinaVanessa]

I don't have an issue with having my parents coming and staying for a while as long as it doesn't interfere with my daily activities and I would still charge for the paydate even if the parent was here. If the child is in my home then I would charge because I'd be in charge, now if we met at a park then I wouldn't charge but then I would not be responsible for the child.

However if you have an issue with being cofortable while having a parent there because you'd feel like you were "being watched" or something or you're apprehensive about how the children may act while the parent is there then just discuss this with the parent ahead of time. If you don't feel comfortable doing it, then don't do it.

[itlw8]

I would tell the parent while I have room for a drop in play date. It is ____ per hour. and because of regulations I am not allowed to have other adults here taking my focus away from the children.

Even if I allowed the parent to stay and HELP with an activity say painting. I would still charge the hourly rate for drop in care.

[nannyde]

I would just tell them that you ran it by your daycare parents and asked if it would be okay that you offered their child as a play date playmate and each parent said they were okay with it as long as the visiting parent paid their child's tuition that day. If the visiting parent is willing to pay for the time of the other children then it will work out to everyones benefit. Then give her a daily rate on all the kids attending.

Suzy is 30 dollars a day
Bobby is 32
Zach is 35
Sarah is 42

So if you are willing to pay the 139 to the parents they will offer their children as a playmate for yours.

Just let us know what day you want to come. happyface

[Jewels]

I had a parent and kid come over one day, they had moved and had to switch daycares, and the kids here always asked about him, and I still talked to the mom we've become friends, and she came over for a playdate one morning and stayed the whole morning, the kids were very happy to see each other again, everyone had a great time, I did not charge for this. And I had a little assistance also, To me I would personally allow this, but I really love all my families, and if one had been gone for a while, and really missed all their friends, and the parent wanted to stay, I would be for it, I would plan a day for it, and not do any activities, just leave it a morning for them to play and have fun, as long as they came after breakfast, and left before lunch.

[Unregistered]

Ok sorry for the confusion- I'm trying not to be too specific because the parents use this site. The situation I posed Is hypothetical, but the actual situation is very close to the hypothetical situation- if that makes any sense..

Would you allow a dcm to come on a play date for a few hours? What if it was a dcd, would that make a difference? I don't understand why they want a parent present play date when they have been bringing the kids on and off while on break. They were just here 3 weeks ago for the entire day. I am wondering if they are pulling the same swap on me thy did to their op and re-interviewing me to see who they want to go with??? They always say they and the kids love me and learn so much while here. They have no reason to want to leave, other that I said I cannot drive them and all of the other daycare kids to drop them off at a weekly gymnastics class and pick them up. Never had injuries, issues, or problems of any kind. I just doesn't make sense to me. I said yes bc I have nothing to hide, but I am very thrown off...

[Heidi]

To me, it would totally depend on the dynamics of the kids and my relationship with the parent. There are people I would invite for a play date, and there are people I would say no to when asked.

[Blackcat31]

If they have already been attending your daycare (without parents) before, no way would I now allow the parent to come do an observation. That is weird. :confused:

If it is a true "play date" with one of your own children then I would suggest a day that isn't a daycare day or for the playdate to happen at their house.

I say go with your gut instinct here because you are probably right as this whole situation sounds "off" to me.

[renodeb]

Ok, I would not allow a parent to hang around here for a play date, I really dont have the space and its a disruption. You could always tell them that legally you cant have any other adult there that hasnt been back ground checked to be around your daycare. Afterall who could argue with that?
Thats a tough spot to be in. I can so relate to needing the income!
You could always change your contract to include some kind of holding fee if they leave for the summer and say there coming back.
Debbie

[daycare]

If it is off of daycare time cool, I am down for that and do them on weekends sometimes...BUT never with DCParents.

They use my services and pay for them.

I think that if I started doing playdates for free, now its an open invitation to give free childcare and have to entertain and adult...NO thanks.

I don't mingle off the clock with my DCP. Unless it has to do with sports or some other activity.

Trust me when I tell you DONT befriend your daycare parents..

Nothing worse when you have to call CPS on your daycare parent friend or term them.....

[Jewels]

For me it would matter if it were a daycare dad, I would say no to that, I don't want a father coming and hanging out, it crosses a line for me, and my husband would not be happy if I had a dad coming and hanging out, When I had a mom bring her kid over to play for a bit, because he missed everyone, she stayed to, as to not drop her kid on me, so they were here, but she was in charge of her son not me, if he needed some water, that was for her to get, she stayed to take care of him, and not put the extra responsibility on me. I once brought my son to his old daycare to play, everyone missed each other, so I brought him by when they were all outside playing, I stayed for the same reason, my son wanted to see everyone, but I wasn't just going to drop him off, I stayed because he wasn't her responsibility he was mine, and i will watch him, and make sure he behaves, and take care of anything he may need.
I dont really know what else to say, if you don't want to lose the family, and its very important to you, I say pick a day and time, when everyone is outside playing, and have them come over to play, (if you've been having amazing weather where you are) And then if it is a dad, at least everyone is outside, I would be more apt to have a father hang out, outdoors, most of my pickups are by dads, and they always hang out a bit anyways. If you don't care about losing the family, do what nannyde suggested.