Husbands and Childcare

[dave4him]

I don't know why Dave- maybe I am having an off day.....but your post just rubbed me the wrong way for some reason. Are you trying to not have to work? It sounds like your happy you have three kids so you don't have to go to work- I am probably reading into this wrong.

Oklay ill make this clear. I WORK, and I love to work! I wake up at 5, get the kids up and ready, make breakfast, take a couple to school, come home and teach and play, make lunch, clean house, wash fold dishes, make dinner, head to Lowes for my evening job i do on most nights and weekends. I dont get much down time so i do believe i work full time. Was just responding the question at hand. I get your idea but it hurts me deeply not being skilled enough to get a better job. I quit my current job two years ago since daycare is too expensive with our own two and we agreeed it was better. I am not lazy.

[My3cents]

Oklay ill make this clear. I WORK, and I love to work! I wake up at 5, get the kids up and ready, make breakfast, take a couple to school, come home and teach and play, make lunch, clean house, wash fold dishes, make dinner, head to Lowes for my evening job i do on most nights and weekends. I dont get much down time so i do believe i work full time. Was just responding the question at hand. I get your idea but it hurts me deeply not being skilled enough to get a better job. I quit my current job two years ago since daycare is too expensive with our own two and we agreeed it was better. I am not lazy.

I see now. She wants you to get a job outside the house. Is that what you want?

Sorry but it does take skills to do daycare. So your not with out skills If you want a job outside of home, you can always go to school part time, do daycare and Lowes in the meantime and move forward to a place you will feel better in your life. Thanks for clarifying

Are you doing daycare because you see no other way or because you have a love for what you do? Just curious-

[dave4him]

I see now. She wants you to get a job outside the house. Is that what you want?

Sorry but it does take skills to do daycare. So your not with out skills If you want a job outside of home, you can always go to school part time, do daycare and Lowes in the meantime and move forward to a place you will feel better in your life. Thanks for clarifying

Are you doing daycare because you see no other way or because you have a love for what you do? Just curious-

I love being there for my kids and being able to use my Pastoral ministry degree to teach them and other kids who come my way. This is a season and I'm loving it.

[Sunchimes]

My husband is about 98% supportive. He thinks the parents push me around too much, but since coming to the forum, I've straightened up most of that.

He is semi-retired-works 3 partial days a week if it doesn't rain. The kids love him. If they know he's home, they stand at the gate and call him. One of my drop in girls won't leave without coming into the living room and hugging him good-bye. If she has a coat, nothing will do but that he put it on her. Monday, her grandma was carrying her out. They got out on the porch and grandma set her down. She whirled around and rushed back in to hug hubby.

Since the new baby started, he's been a life saver. Thank goodness for 2 weeks of rain! He has spent hours helping out, rocking the baby, giving bottles, every thing but changing diapers. It's allowed me a grace period to adjust to having a baby around.

We've worked together 24/7 at our other businesses since 1980, so we have things pretty well worked out.

[DaycareMomma]

Daycare originally caused a lot of strife between my husband and I. Basically, he thought that it would be an easy way for me to make money, take care of the kids and do all the housework during the day and then take on more in the evening so he could take a break. His expectations were very high and he had no clue what daycare parents would do to me, what the kids would do to the house and what sacrifices he would have to make (hearing kids screaming when he was home sick, toys all over the place and such). We are MUCH better now about the reality of home daycare and are both on the same page as far as me closing down as soon as possible. It was really hard there for awhile because he was making me feel lazy about not keeping up or not taking more kids and stupid for not being able to handle it all. Daycare is something we have had to do to make ends meet but definitely not our first choice. Now he is quick to give advice to other people considering it and quicker to see that I am doing A LOT. He hates when our SAHM mom friends complain about being busy and tired and makes me laugh as he details to them what all I have been doing for five years. total 180 turnaround.

Wow that sounds like my husband to a T!

My husband is suprised by how much stress it puts on me and how it effects our house. We're currently trying to decide if we move into the country and rent a place which will allow me to get out of the house and get a different job, or if we buy the place we're in and I keep doing daycare while finishing up my schooling.

[My3cents]

I love being there for my kids and being able to use my Pastoral ministry degree to teach them and other kids who come my way. This is a season and I'm loving it.

I see, I see...... stand up for yourself as a provider, advertise, and word of mouth will get around that you are a great provider. Perch on the wisdom of the providers here that have been doing this for years....best advice and great place for venting, and for getting you where you want to be in your business.

Keep reminding your wife and family, that you have a real job and it is going to take time to become established. Demand that they support you as you support them in the choices that they make. Some of the best nurses out there are male nurses......typically known to be a women's field of work. Great teachers that are males also- Don't be intimidated because you are a male in a typically known field to women. You have the potential to be great and love what you do.