Please Don't Stop The Pacifier Today!!

[Sunchimes]

My original dcg (18 mon) old is coming back today after being gone for 3 months--she will be like a whole new kid. She's coming back with a 6 week old brother.

So, what does my other dcm do? She decides to stop her daughter's pacifier last night. Come on, seriously? You've been my only dc family for 3 months, you've known for at least 2 weeks that this day was going to be chaotic and that I was nervous about it. And you picked today to stop? Why not 3 weeks ago? I love this baby, but she is very volatile on good days, and the 45 minutes she's been here so far has been one big screaming, throwing fest. She only takes it at nap, what's the big deal?

I told her no. I said I would try, but if she wouldn't sleep, I was pulling out my spare. She didn't leave happy. Fine, I wasn't happy either.

Wish me luck, it promises to be a long, long day! ::

[cheerfuldom]

They probably took it way last night and baby is exhausted now. I would just give it to her till the transition with the other two is done.

[familyschoolcare]

OP you coual also say the child needs to be weaned of the pacifier at home for 2 weeks (or what ever time you are comfortable with). Much like many

people do with no daipers or introducing solid foods. Sorry the mom did that she was not thinking of you or the child in the daycare setting. Not that mom

did not think just that she did not consider the entire situation.

[Blackcat31]

Um, she had 3 months to wean her child and she is choosing now????

Nope. Uh huh.

[wdmmom]

I don't do pacifiers at the daycare. It's just another piece to get lost, other kids cry for them, the land on the floor and need to be washed, etc.

They're more trouble than they are worth.

[saved4always]

I only do pacifiers at nap. If the kids come in with one, I usually grab it as soon as it is abandoned and put it in ther pnp or up somewhere until nap. So icky if some other child picks it up and puts it in the mouth.

[Sunchimes]

I just have 3 kids, and none of them have used it for anything but naptime in many, many months. Two were completely finished before Christmas. She tried to get this one weaned, but then her dad started week long custody visits, and it completely turned this child upside down, so she let her have it back. Thank goodness, because it was a nightmare.

Anyway, in the good news, I got through my first day with the new baby. I don't like tiny babies any more than I thought I would, but I survived. And I know it will get better. He didn't like his bed, and he wanted to be held. Thank goodness my husband was off. He rocked and fed, I changed diapers. He isn't on any kind of schedule and she just weaned him to a bottle this week. I had no idea what to do. Nanny's baby schedule fell apart pretty fast, but tomorrow is another day. I will not be defeated!!!

I can't wait until he hits 6 months. I like that age!!! I did miss my time with the girls. My favorite part of DC was playing with the kids. I didn't get much of that--and probably won't for awhile. The good news is that I can take him outside any time I want to, so we can still have our walks. I'll put a vest on the girls and him in the stroller--as soon as the weather clears up and I figure out if the car seat thing will fit in my stroller or until I buy one of those neck cushions for it.

The best part of it? I'm finally making a living wage. I took her off of drop in rate and moved her to part time. Life is good, even if I've had to change clothes 3 times today. ;-)

[Unregistered]

People will tell me they are weaning their kids off of pacifiers but still give it to them at home. I have seen them in the store or give it to their kids in the car. So if the tell me no paci I will buy clean ones and give it to them at care. If the parents walk in I say "oh they must have got it from the baby." Do what works for you and your program. Never let parents tell you what to do in your own house and with your own daycare.

[Sunchimes]

Dear Guest,

I like the way you think! ::

[DCMom]

Dear Guest,

I like the way you think! ::

. Me too

I have a nap time only rule for pacifiers; they stay in their pnp when they get up. If she needs it to sleep, I would give it to her. I never believed in taking them cold turkey.

[saved4always]

Dear Guest,

I like the way you think! ::

Me, too! ::

[Blackcat31]

People will tell me they are weaning their kids off of pacifiers but still give it to them at home. I have seen them in the store or give it to their kids in the car. So if the tell me no paci I will buy clean ones and give it to them at care. If the parents walk in I say "oh they must have got it from the baby." Do what works for you and your program. Never let parents tell you what to do in your own house and with your own daycare.

I think this is wrong and basically you are lying to the parent.

I know that parents have told me that their child is weaned and then I have on occassion seen them in the store and the child has a paci in their mouth. Yes, I am like , I thought they were no longer using one, but I would never just go buy one and do it at daycare anyways. That makes me just as bad as that parent then. I don't play that way. :confused:

I would walk right up to the parent and address the issue, which is dishonesty. I would never just sink to their level.

I would tell the mom that I am upset that she lied to me and I would tell her that if she isn't going to be honest with me and work WITH me to do what is right by her child then we probably shouldn't be in this partnership of daycare/parent together.

I would really have to feel like she was being honest from then on and I would make sure she knows that if I hear someone else saw little Billy with a pacifier or if I saw him with one again that I would term for dishonest behavior. It is absolutely vital that these parents trust me and for me to trust them as well.

To just go out and buy new ones to do whatever you please in your house simply because it is your house=your rules is a sad concept. I am dissapointed that there are child care providers out there that do that because it gives everyone a bad rep. We are suppose to be working WITH parents and doing things together not working against each other in a dishonest manner.

[DCMom]

To just go out and buy new ones to do whatever you please in your house simply because it is your house=your rules is a sad concept. I am dissapointed that there are child care providers out there that do that because it gives everyone a bad rep. We are suppose to be working WITH parents and doing things together not working against each other in a dishonest manner.

I would like to clarify my response of 'naptime only' pacifiers.

When a parent comes in and tells me that they are weaning the pacificer I will say 'define weaning'. Generally, it means that they want me to do the weaning. That's when I let them know that I only have pacifiers at nap time, in the crib, not all day walking around with it. The usual response is "Oh. We should try that at home." I then let them know that I will continue to use the paci at nap and to let me know how it goes at home.

After that, I generally never hear about weaning the paci anymore because once it becomes a nap/bedtime only thing at home, I have found that they pretty much wean themselves. If they throw it out of the crib, they don't get it back.

I don't go behind the parents back; I do let them know that I continue to use it at naptime. I AGREE that we should work together, not against each other. But all too often parents expect us to do what they themselves cannot accomplish and that's where the hard feelings come in.

[Blackcat31]

I would like to clarify my response of 'naptime only' pacifiers.

When a parent comes in and tells me that they are weaning the pacificer I will say 'define weaning'. Generally, it means that they want me to do the weaning. That's when I let them know that I only have pacifiers at nap time, in the crib, not all day walking around with it. The usual response is "Oh. We should try that at home." I then let them know that I will continue to use the paci at nap and to let me know how it goes at home.

After that, I generally never hear about weaning the paci anymore because once it becomes a nap/bedtime only thing at home, I have found that they pretty much wean themselves. If they throw it out of the crib, they don't get it back.

I don't go behind the parents back; I do let them know that I continue to use it at naptime. I AGREE that we should work together, not against each other. But all too often parents expect us to do what they themselves cannot accomplish and that's where the hard feelings come in.

See, there is some communication there and THAT was my point. To simply do whatever we want without any form of discussion or clarification or communication is dishonest to me.

You have a plan of action and the parent is not only aware of it but on board with it which to me is working together.

[familyschoolcare]

People will tell me they are weaning their kids off of pacifiers but still give it to them at home. I have seen them in the store or give it to their kids in the car. So if the tell me no paci I will buy clean ones and give it to them at care. If the parents walk in I say "oh they must have got it from the baby." Do what works for you and your program. Never let parents tell you what to do in your own house and with your own daycare.

While many others have said they like the way you think. I do not. I understand the whole do what works thing, and the do not let parents tell

you how to run your bussiness thing. The thing that trumps those is the honesty or lack of it with the above mentioned situation. If we as providers

whant parents to tell us when their child is sick, when thier child has been given meds, when thier child is having an emotional time because of

something going on at home ect. We as providers need to give the same honesty bak to them. I am starting to undrstand why one of my DCF likes

how honest I am, they told me they found in refreshing.