Parents Jealous??

[busymommy0420]

Do you ever feel like the parents are jealous of the time you have with their children???

I have one DCM who is always making little comments and it hard to know how to take them. She says all her daughter (almost 3) does is talk about me and my daughters. She always compliments things I do for the kids but kind of in a snarky way. For example today she came in and the girls were playing at the sensory bin. Her daughter wanted to keep playing and she said, "Well I know Mrs. B*** comes up with all the cool ideas but we can make one at home." There has been other comments too very similar to this one.

I just smiled. I really think she is jealous or something? I have her daughter 50 hours a week...she is a great kid, sometimes annoying but a really nice little girl. I just get the vibe her Mom is jealous of all the fun we have. Is that weird?

~I would want my child having fun??

[daycare]

Do you ever feel like the parents are jealous of the time you have with their children???

I have one DCM who is always making little comments and it hard to know how to take them. She says all her daughter (almost 3) does is talk about me and my daughters. She always compliments things I do for the kids but kind of in a snarky way. For example today she came in and the girls were playing at the sensory bin. Her daughter wanted to keep playing and she said, "Well I know Mrs. B*** comes up with all the cool ideas but we can make one at home." There has been other comments too very similar to this one.

I just smiled. I really think she is jealous or something? I have her daughter 50 hours a week...she is a great kid, sometimes annoying but a really nice little girl. I just get the vibe her Mom is jealous of all the fun we have. Is that weird?

~I would want my child having fun??

I had a DCM who decided to bring her kids here for 11.5 hours a day and then started getting jealous that they never wanted to go home and when they would wake they couldnt wait to come here. They too always talked about me all of the time.

The mom started putting me down and doing all sorts of stuff.... She tells me one day, do you think you are better than me??? That was the end of it

[Sunchimes]

I think that 2 of mine are jealous, but in a normal way, not a bad way. They would love to be with their kids and they envy me for the time I get to spend with them. But, life is what it is, and they are glad they have someone to love them while they have to work. I've never sensed any meanness from them.

We talked about it once, and I told her that it wasn't a bad thing for her child to love my husband and me. I believe that the more people a child loves and is loved by, the better off they are. She thought about it and decided that was true. We've actually been a better team since then.

[cheeseheadmama]

As a former daycare parent turned provider, I used to watch my son's provider and wonder how she did everything that she did in a day with the kids when I couldn't even manage to get anything done with my own kid around. I was jealous of her TIME and how pulled together that I thought she was. Now that I am on the other side and have peeked behind the curtain, I realized that she didn't have it all pulled together, but that ROUTINE was important to the provider and the kids.

I have a new 11-month old whose mom is similar to the way I used to be. She looks at me with wonderment that I can manage to keep my sanity with all these kids running around when she has trouble with 1 that isn't even walking yet.

Jealousy can take many forms, but the mean jealousy is the worst. I have a feeling that your jealous DCM is feeling bad/guilty that she has to be away from her kids for so long and then taking it out on you. Unfortunately, there is nothing you will be able to do to make her feel better about it since you did not create the situation. If she keeps doing it, you might want to try to help her see if from the other side; would she really want her kids to HATE going to daycare?

[cheerfuldom]

I think that some parents will never be happy because they don't want their kids in daycare. If they kids love it, parents get jealous. If the kids hate it, parents blame you. Some people can just never be satisfied.

[Mary Poppins]

I haven't gotten the sense that my dcps are jealous of the relationship I have with their kids but I worry more that they are jealous because of the lifestyle I am afforded thanks to the fact that my dh works his arse off and makes a great living and I sweeten the pot by doing dc.

I know they choose me because I offer a really nice place to bring the kids, but sometimes I almost feel guilty knowing that some of my dcps are struggling to make ends meet and they can't help but see us doing well. We have a great home, a boat, an RV and all the fun toys to go with it, and dh just bought me a Porsche for my 40th b-day (happyface). I honestly kept it in the garage for weeks out of guilt, which is silly. ::

To top it off, we take vacations to places most people dream of but I feel like I shouldn't mention to my dcps what our plans are for my time off because I don't want them to get weird on me.

Does anyone else have THESE types of jealousy issues, I wonder? :confused:

[Breezy]

I haven't gotten the sense that my dcps are jealous of the relationship I have with their kids but I worry more that they are jealous because of the lifestyle I am afforded thanks to the fact that my dh works his arse off and makes a great living and I sweeten the pot by doing dc.

I know they choose me because I offer a really nice place to bring the kids, but sometimes I almost feel guilty knowing that some of my dcps are struggling to make ends meet and they can't help but see us doing well. We have a great home, a boat, an RV and all the fun toys to go with it, and dh just bought me a Porsche for my 40th b-day (happyface). I honestly kept it in the garage for weeks out of guilt, which is silly. ::

To top it off, we take vacations to places most people dream of but I feel like I shouldn't mention to my dcps what our plans are for my time off because I don't want them to get weird on me.

Does anyone else have THESE types of jealousy issues, I wonder? :confused:

I occasionally feel like this. I have a family where both parents work retail. Dad works at LEAST 50-60 hours a week and mom wasn't wanting to go back to work bit had to because they needed the money. I feel bad because I am a sahm with just two dcks and we have ron's of family time together when they never see eachother. My Dh is in the military and has tons of leave saved up from when he was deployed last year.

[jessrlee]

I haven't gotten the sense that my dcps are jealous of the relationship I have with their kids but I worry more that they are jealous because of the lifestyle I am afforded thanks to the fact that my dh works his arse off and makes a great living and I sweeten the pot by doing dc.

I know they choose me because I offer a really nice place to bring the kids, but sometimes I almost feel guilty knowing that some of my dcps are struggling to make ends meet and they can't help but see us doing well. We have a great home, a boat, an RV and all the fun toys to go with it, and dh just bought me a Porsche for my 40th b-day (happyface). I honestly kept it in the garage for weeks out of guilt, which is silly. ::

To top it off, we take vacations to places most people dream of but I feel like I shouldn't mention to my dcps what our plans are for my time off because I don't want them to get weird on me.

Does anyone else have THESE types of jealousy issues, I wonder? :confused:

I often feel this way. We are pretty young (27-32) and have a very nice house, two new cars, etc. I often get comments from the parents that make me feel bad.

I also get a lot of flack because they will see my laundry done, or smell my dinner in the crockpot and moan about all of the work they are going home to

I get upset because they know how hard we work, we hardly ever close, we put a TON of money into the daycare space, playground, and toys, and still we get attitude if we buy a new car, do remodeling, or even make the daycare nicer!

[nannyde]

No I don't see that.

My kids have a substantial amount of awake time (about five hours) with their parents every day. As long as they are caring for their kids awake for a good portion of the day you shouldn't have issues of jealousy. When you figure in nap time we have about the same amount of face time each day. The kids all have a way better gig at home than they do here so they want to be home with their parents.

[kayla]

I have a parent that is jealous, but I dont think it's because of the time i spend with her child. This parent is jealous of the fact that i get to stay home and do the job I do. She always makes comments on how nice it would be to get to stay home all day.( If they only knew). She says things like oh if I stayed home I could get everything done.( Umm no, I'm busy taking care of your child and others, feeding, cleaning, playing). I dont understand some parents think we have the easiest job in the world. It really erks me. How about they work for 10-12 hours a day everyday, for unappreciative parents and wild kids.. I always think in my head they could never do it. Especially the ones that have a hard time with only there child. I dare those people to take a day in our shoes. And make sure it is a mon or fri, those seem to be my hectic days!!

[SunshineMama]

I often feel this way. We are pretty young (27-32) and have a very nice house, two new cars, etc. I often get comments from the parents that make me feel bad.

I also get a lot of flack because they will see my laundry done, or smell my dinner in the crockpot and moan about all of the work they are going home to

I get upset because they know how hard we work, we hardly ever close, we put a TON of money into the daycare space, playground, and toys, and still we get attitude if we buy a new car, do remodeling, or even make the daycare nicer!

Same here! I'm 28 and DH is 30. We have the largest house in the neighborhood and drive really nice new cars. I always have a crockpot going too! My younger families don't seem to mind, but the older ones do sometimes make a few sarcastic remarks, followed by a few ha ha's. I just let it roll off of my shoulders. They are more than welcome to quit their jobs and do daycare just like I did, if having time with their kids is that important to them. Everyone has their own priorities- mine is my kids. (Not to say that dcp's dont value their kids, but if you really want to make it work, you can).

[DCBlessings27]

No Jealousy

I haven't really had issues with parents making comments to me. The parents notice if I have something cooking in the crockpot and say that it smells nice. We went to Disney World for a week over Christmas. The parents did say that they wanted to take their children there someday but never in a mean way.

If anything, I sometimes have to kick myself when I feel jealous of them. (I don't make comments to them about it.) One dcm just stayed home a day to have a girl day with her daughter. Another dcm gets off early one day a week and came to pick up dcg early to take her to the park.

I rarely take any time off and when I do I have to schedule it months in advance in order to give my dcps time to find alternate care. By the time the kids leave at 6, the weather has cooled and I can't take my daughter on a walk or to the park or even outside to play on our swingset. (Ok...I'll kick myself now. I need a day off, which I don't have scheduled until my daughter's birthday at the end of April.)

[countrymom]

I went to a dck's birthday party 2 weeks ago (don't ever go to one) but every present that she opened she had to show me, at first it was funny, but I think the family thought it was weird that she wanted my opinion.

I do spend time with everyones children, I do things that families don't want to do because its a headache for them. I get alot of, I don't have time but what they dont' realize I'm done at the same time they are and still manage to do everything with my kids. Maybe because i manage my time more, I don't know. I also talk with the kids all day, all they want is attention from someone. Like when my kids come home (and all 4 start talking at once) ya its crazy, but I listen to every single one of my kids and ask how their day was, heck even the dck's like to listen to them.

[CheekyChick]

I get comments like that too. It must be so hard to have someone else with YOUR child 40+ hours per week. I would be jealous too.

[SD DaycareMOM]

Point out the benefits her child is getting from such a great relationship

A few years ago I had a dcm who was very jealous of my relationship with her daughter. It started off with mild comments, and I wasn't even sure at first if I was just imagining it. I wish that I had had a conversation with her about it instead of letting it progress. I think that is what eventually led to the end of our business relationship. I see now how much I have learned since then! Maybe a simple conversation pointing out how multiple loving relationships are so beneficial to the kids, could have helped. It evetually got to the point of her doing very mean spirited things to "sabotage" me, and I had to terminate. That is the only family in my five years of having my own daycare that I have ever had to terminate.