Terming Constantly Sick DCB- Need Help With Term Letter

[SunshineMama]

14 month old DCB came here today, breathing that phlegmy, wheezy breath that I have now become used to. His nose is clear and running. Again.

I have had this child since last November, and every week it is something (diaharrea a few times, and mostly a ton of mild colds). I have posted about this before- this child has only been healthy for maybe one week since November.

I have decided to term, but I am going to secure a new family before I do. I just can't take it anymore, and even though my sick policy says minor colds are okay, it was really meant for children with mild, occasional colds, not children with a new cold every week.

What would you include in the term letter and discussion to parents? I know they will probably feel this is coming out of nowhere, because I have not said much about him constantly being sick, other than when I told them he was sick last week and they said that they are pretty much used to him having something all the time. How should I phrase it?

[momofboys]

14 month old DCB came here today, breathing that phlegmy, wheezy breath that I have now become used to. His nose is clear and running. Again.

I have had this child since last November, and every week it is something (diaharrea a few times, and mostly a ton of mild colds). I have posted about this before- this child has only been healthy for maybe one week since November.

I have decided to term, but I am going to secure a new family before I do. I just can't take it anymore, and even though my sick policy says minor colds are okay, it was really meant for children with mild, occasional colds, not children with a new cold every week.

What would you include in the term letter and discussion to parents? I know they will probably feel this is coming out of nowhere, because I have not said much about him constantly being sick, other than when I told them he was sick last week and they said that they are pretty much used to him having something all the time. How should I phrase it?

I would just word it as you are scaling down your business or TBH you don't have to say WHY & it's probably better that you don't. Just say you will no longer be able to provide care for him & tell them the end date. Done.

[SunshineMama]

Having second thoughts

Thanks for your response.

I think I was feeling emotional about this earlier today, but after some thought, I think that i am going to try to work with his parents first, since I have not really said much to them. I decided that I have to have the courage to tell them how I feel and see if there is anything that they are willing to do or can do. He is a sweet baby and sooooo easy to watch, and the parents always pay on time, and maybe he won't be sick once the weather gets a little better???? Fingers crossed!

I guess I feel I just need to be fair to mom and dad so they don't think this just comes out of left field. I mean, technically, they are allowed to bring him with minor colds, I was just soooo irritated this morning after my little dd bolted toward him earlier and took a cheerio off of his plate and stuck it in her mouth. She is just now getting over the last cold he brought over, and I was so frustrated with the thought that she might get his new sickness.

I just want to do the right thing and be fair to the family.

[Sunchimes]

This is probably irrelevant, but are you sure it's a cold? I have a little one (18 months) that always has sneezes, sniffles, and a constant runny nose. It looks exactly like a mild head cold. But, it's allergies. When her poor little upper lip gets raw, the doctor starts her on allergy meds, and after a few days, she almost dries up. They are hesitant to keep her on constant medication at this age. She doesn't seem to feel bad, so they have opted to do the on/off treatment for now. She has a ton of allergies--skin and food---besides the nasal issues.

You've probably already thought of this, but I thought I'd throw it out, just in case.

[Breezy]

Sounds like my cousins daughter. She always and I mean ALWAYS had this gross sounding barking cough. For MONTHS. And it was allergies but it always made everyone uneasy until they figured out it was an allergy. She is much better now though (shes 4 now)! So they must have found something to help her

[Ariana]

I agree it sounds like allergies, but if your DCF is anything like one of mine they won't take your advice and the "cold" will continue all winter long.

I also agree that I wouldn't give the specific reason for terming just mention that you're scaling back or finding that you have too many kids or someting along those lines. Good luck!

[Blackcat31]

It might be where I live, I don't know, but it seems to me that it is pretty common for kids who are around 12 months-18 months to be sick like that all the time. NOT all, but a good majority of them.

I kind of feel like it is par for the course considering kids that age mouth EVERYTHING and eat NOTHING on a regular basis. They also sleep poorly due to their changing bodies and all.

It just seems like it is pretty normal for kids that age to be sort of always on the verge of beng sick or having a cold.

Once they turn 2 and have adjusted to life a bit more, it seems they aren't so sick.

In my mind when someone says their kid is that age, I picture runny noses and drooling constantly. ::

[Lilbutterflie]

It might be where I live, I don't know, but it seems to me that it is pretty common for kids who are around 12 months-18 months to be sick like that all the time. NOT all, but a good majority of them.

I kind of feel like it is par for the course considering kids that age mouth EVERYTHING and eat NOTHING on a regular basis. They also sleep poorly due to their changing bodies and all.

It just seems like it is pretty normal for kids that age to be sort of always on the verge of beng sick or having a cold.

Once they turn 2 and have adjusted to life a bit more, it seems they aren't so sick.

In my mind when someone says their kid is that age, I picture runny noses and drooling constantly. ::

Yup, I completely agree! Some children have better immune systems than others; but in my experience, it is normal for babies until age 2 to get colds very frequently.

My son was like this until he was about 2. His ped told me the following once (after listening to me ask him over and over if he was SURE my son's frequent colds were normal);
Did you know that there are approx 31 THOUSAND different cold viruses out there right now? Once our body has had a cold virus, it pretty much becomes immune to that specific cold virus. But then, when their little bodies encounter another one; they get a cold all over again. Until they build up immunity to many of the viruses they frequently come into contact again; they tend to have one cold after another... after another.

[itlw8]

suggest they take away ALL milk products for 1 month I bet it improves Those are classic milk allergy symptoms.

[kayla]

date
name
address

This letter will serve as notice of terminationof care for childs name for the following reason:
state reason

The last date of care will be date.

We wish you and your family well.

Sincerely,

your name.

[SunshineMama]

suggest they take away ALL milk products for 1 month I bet it improves Those are classic milk allergy symptoms.

They are still giving him milk-based formula, even though he is over 1 year old. I wonder if it is a milk allergy? I did not know that milk could cause those types of symptoms.

I think that I am going to give it a few more months, and see if the warmer weather helps at all. In the meantime, I am planning on serving lots of Vitamin C and anti-oxident rich foods at lunchtime and for snacks in the hopes that will help boost his (and everyone else's) immunity. Hello oranges!

[youretooloud]

I had a kid who was ALWAYS sick. His mom didn't work, so he didn't NEED to be here....so, he missed a lot of days.

I kept telling her to check for mold in her house... there's no reason for him to be sick all the time. They never checked.

Just last year (at age four) mom was cleaning out his closet, and found black mold on some of his cardboard boxes... she didn't think much of that... but, as she was pulling more things out of his closet, she found it on everything. She called a contractor to come look at it and see if they could redo the drywall in the closet, he said it's very serious, and they weren't qualified to remove a health hazard. She was all shocked. It'd been growing there for years. It's been infecting him and his clothes and bedding most of his life. Their linen closet is on the other side of that, so his sheets and towels were also closed up with black mold.

In the end, they finally moved out of that house and into one of the properties they were using as a rental, and he has magically improved 100%.

[3myjob]

My nephew would constantly have a clear runny nose and the drainage would run to his ears at night causing him lots of earaches. My SIL (a nurse practitioner) realized while talking to her patient with similar problems that it may be an allergy due to cow's milk. She went home and switched him to goats milk and he's been fine ever since.

[SunshineMama]

OMG that's sad that there was so much mold in the house. That is soooo dangerous!

I am going to google some more info about the milk allergy so I have some concrete info when I present this to the parents.

They are all eating right now: oranges, blueberries, organic mixed veggies, and homamade chicken noodle soup. I'm going to get this kid healthy, or at least try as hard as I can!

[Meyou]

As someone who had a runny nose and cold symptoms for my entire childhood from allergies I would at least look into them unless you feel the need to term right away. I looked sick from 3 to 17 when I outgrew the worst of the symptoms. I got shots twice a week but they only lessened the symptoms.

But I also agree with Blackcat. 12 to 18 months coupled with their first winter in childcare is a recipe for a 6 month cold around here too. I start warning the parents in the summer about how rough the first winter can be regarding colds.