Injury At Daycare, Need Advice

[makap]

What a crappy situation to be in! So sorry for you.

Toddlers are toddlers, they all push and shove to get what they want and others will fall and get bumps and bruises. The 12 month old will most likely be doing this as well as he gets closer to the 18 month old mark.

If this father can not understand this which he obviously can not, then his little 12 month old definitely needs a nanny with no other kids around.

Gee I would love to see when this child starts school. What are they going to do then? I think they may need to hire a private teacher for him in their home so that he never gets pushed or shoved.

If you do not want to terminate perhaps a nice letter to him explaining why his rates are going to increase would be a good idea! Inform him that because of his threat of involving a third party you have decided that you can not run the risk of this happening again. Because you can not allow this child to sustain any other injuries, which are basically beyond your control as you have other children to tend to, you are going to be hiring an assistant who can be with his child x number of hours per day for x number of $$$ per day!

[nannyde]

The child who was injured would have to go today. I wouldn't allow a parent to set foot in my house who had previously threatened me with a third party. So for the sake of that parent... they need the life experience to have an immediate consequence for that kind of behavior. They had the option to remove the child immediately and just pay your notice time. Instead they threatened you.

At this point your mistakes have already been done with this situation and you really can't undo what has already happened.

Please read this blog: https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/surr...o-the-baby.htm

This is the technique I use to insure nothing like this ever happens.

I would NEVER allow a 12 month old new walker to free range toys in the same space as a 17 month old. Too dangerous. When he hurt him the first time it was your warning shot that they can NOT be in the same place without barriers between them. The 17 month old can't manage the baby in it's space.

My parents would be furious over an accident like this because I have given them my word that the older children/toddlers will not have access to the baby until each older child can safely manage the baby. They wouldn't threaten a lawyer but they would remove their child that day and I couldn't blame them. I have a NO violence policy so this would really upset them especially if it happened twice.

I've been operating for 18 years and I have never had an injury like this. Having it happen twice is a clear indication that you need to completely change how you manage these kids at this age. It's your responsibility to NEVER give a child access to another child that you aren't a hundred percent sure that they can safely pay around them. You knew this child had the potential to get physical with the baby and it happened again. It's time to make serious changes to protect the kids AND yourself.

[JenNJ]

I am very much like Nan when it comes to the babies. The older kids have zero access to their area and the baby itself. When I "release" the baby into the playroom, the kids are trained to not touch the baby or the baby's toys. If baby bothers them, they are to freeze -- no correcting baby, no turning away, no yanking the toy. They wait for me to come and handle the baby. Even babies are separated from babies unless I am in between them since a baby cannot control itself the way an older child can.

I once put a child on probation simply for touching a baby. DCG walked behind me and wiggled the toy on the exersaucer and grabbed baby's arm. Not in a mean way. She thought that she would be sneaky and do it while her mother was there to pick her up. She thought the rules did not apply since her mom was there. Wrong. I immediately put her in time out and reminded her of the rules. I told mom right then and there is her dd touched the baby or his things again, she would be terminated.

[Meeko]

Actually most of the time this boy is a pleasure to have.He usually plays very nicely with others. He does spend time with some older cousins who like to rough house. I have spoken to his mom and she has agreed that at this age he cant regulate his own behavior enough to play rough with cousins one day and then come and play nicely with the others at daycare. She has agreed to talk about this with the cousins parents and grandparents. I kind of feel more comfortable keeping a child who I am confident will get through this phase,than working with parents who will from now on be looking for something to criticize.

I think you have your own answer

[llethert]

First I really thank all of you for your input. It is very helpful. I have decided that it probably would be best to terminate the contract with the parents of the 12month old. I just don't need to worry about "what if..." .He is not here today, so on Monday I will have one more face to face and give them a letter.I am going to suggest that a childcare situation with less children or no other non-family children would be best for them. I am willing to give them 2 weeks, but don' t think they will use it.The father has a very flexible schedule and I would bet he is just going to say hes going to keep him home until they find another option. As for the other boy I really am confident he will get through this phase and I don't think the safety of the other children will be compromised by giving him a chance. I am ready for the challenge.I will definately work closely with his parents and let them know this is a probationary period, and we will need to see changes for him to stay.I am going to post again to report how Mondays talk goes. Thanks everyone!

[JenNJ]

First I really thank all of you for your input. It is very helpful. I have decided that it probably would be best to terminate the contract with the parents of the 12month old. I just don't need to worry about "what if..." .He is not here today, so on Monday I will have one more face to face and give them a letter.I am going to suggest that a childcare situation with less children or no other non-family children would be best for them. I am willing to give them 2 weeks, but don' t think they will use it.The father has a very flexible schedule and I would bet he is just going to say hes going to keep him home until they find another option. As for the other boy I really am confident he will get through this phase and I don't think the safety of the other children will be compromised by giving him a chance. I am ready for the challenge.I will definately work closely with his parents and let them know this is a probationary period, and we will need to see changes for him to stay.I am going to post again to report how Mondays talk goes. Thanks everyone!

Great decision. But please don't give two weeks. Please. They will find a reason to get "third party" involved. These people are NOT worth your future. They aren't. Forget manners, forget generosity, forget compassion. This man has threatened your livelihood. Your future. Your life. Get him out TODAY. Email the notice, pack the things up and tell him to collect them on the front porch by 8pm.

[daycare]

First I really thank all of you for your input. It is very helpful. I have decided that it probably would be best to terminate the contract with the parents of the 12month old. I just don't need to worry about "what if..." .He is not here today, so on Monday I will have one more face to face and give them a letter.I am going to suggest that a childcare situation with less children or no other non-family children would be best for them. I am willing to give them 2 weeks, but don' t think they will use it.The father has a very flexible schedule and I would bet he is just going to say hes going to keep him home until they find another option. As for the other boy I really am confident he will get through this phase and I don't think the safety of the other children will be compromised by giving him a chance. I am ready for the challenge.I will definately work closely with his parents and let them know this is a probationary period, and we will need to see changes for him to stay.I am going to post again to report how Mondays talk goes. Thanks everyone!

make sure you document everything................

[makap]

Great decision. But please don't give two weeks. Please. They will find a reason to get "third party" involved. These people are NOT worth your future. They aren't. Forget manners, forget generosity, forget compassion. This man has threatened your livelihood. Your future. Your life. Get him out TODAY. Email the notice, pack the things up and tell him to collect them on the front porch by 8pm.

I so agree with this.

[llethert]

answer to nannyde

Thank you for your words of wisdom nannyde. I have a relatively small group and honestly never considered this issue you raised. Thank you for giving me this to consider I am now seriously thinking about making this change.I do always teach the older kids to be gentle and kind to their younger friends and that babies are hands off.After the first time I really thought I was on top of the situation ,but now realize there IS something more I should do.

[nannyde]

Thank you for your words of wisdom nannyde. I have a relatively small group and honestly never considered this issue you raised. Thank you for giving me this to consider I am now seriously thinking about making this change.

you are welcome

Don't give the dad two weeks. Do it today. Tell him you have decided not to provide services for them and to arrange pick up for his belongings and their receipt.

I wouldn't go into what the baby needs... just that you are done today. The parent needs an immediate response to the threat. Remember he had the option to pull the child and just offer to pay out your notice time. That was the proper thing to do in this situation but he choose to threaten you instead.

[saved4always]

Great decision. But please don't give two weeks. Please. They will find a reason to get "third party" involved. These people are NOT worth your future. They aren't. Forget manners, forget generosity, forget compassion. This man has threatened your livelihood. Your future. Your life. Get him out TODAY. Email the notice, pack the things up and tell him to collect them on the front porch by 8pm.

I agree with this, too! I don't think I would want them back on my property with the 12 month old again in case something happened. What if he falls or something on Monday when he is there?

[CheekyChick]

mmm...why should the OP wait for one more thing to happen when the parent already threatened her with a "three strikes and you're out" sort of thing? I seriously doubt the aggressor is going to change suddenly and she is really putting herself at risk by keeping a family that is threatening to involve a third party if anything else happen to their child.

I'm guessing his bark is worse than his bite. Do you actually think he would sue her because his son got pushed down and got a bruise? That's silly. I doubt an attorney would even take his case. If I loved the baby (like the OP stated), I would do my best to make it work.

[Meeko]

Please don't give 2 weeks notice. If they take it, you are going to walk on glass for those weeks. They are going to be upset and look for ANYTHING to nail you on. And as accidents DO happen, you are putting your whole world at risk.

Call licensing. Tell them you are terming for threats. Be ready for an inspection anyway because I am sure they will complain.

[JenNJ]

I'm guessing his bark is worse than his bite. Do you actually think he would sue her because his son got pushed down and got a bruise? That's silly. I doubt an attorney would even take his case. If I loved the baby (like the OP stated), I would do my best to make it work.

I don't assume anything. I work on what I KNOW. I KNOW that the OP was threatened. I KNOW that he seems unstable and unreasonable.

She can love the baby to the moon and back. Is that love worth gambling her entire future? I doubt it. She will find another child to love. I KNOW that.

[AmyLeigh]

I'm guessing his bark is worse than his bite. Do you actually think he would sue her because his son got pushed down and got a bruise? That's silly. I doubt an attorney would even take his case. If I loved the baby (like the OP stated), I would do my best to make it work.

If this is true, then dad needs to learn that people will take his threats seriously and he will have to face the consequences of opening his mouth and letting idle threats fly.