Arriving Early For Pick Up BUT............

[laundrymom]

SHOW MOM HOW TO PARENT

Jonathon Michael! Get up off that floor and stop your ugly attitude! you don't act that way when moms working, you won't do it with her here.

Then to mom, no I'm sorry. I do not reward bad behavior with food or attention. Now would you like me to put him in time out for his tantrum or are you carrying him to the car?

[melskids]

SHOW MOM HOW TO PARENT

Jonathon Michael! Get up off that floor and stop your ugly attitude! you don't act that way when moms working, you won't do it with her here.

Then to mom, no I'm sorry. I do not reward bad behavior with food or attention. Now would you like me to put him in time out for his tantrum or are you carrying him to the car?

where's the love button?! oh there it is!

lovethislovethislovethislovethislovethislovethislovethis

[daycare]

where's the love button?! oh there it is!

lovethislovethislovethislovethislovethislovethislovethis

OMG can you come over...... I am too much of a wuss to say something so great like this

[DBug]

I put in a gate after a similar situation happened to me a few years ago -- 3yo dcg running all over my house screaming bloody murder while mom watched . Now I let the child through the gate and lock it behind them. If they throw a fit about something, I turn around and walk away. When mom or dad is here, I'm off the clock

I also find that if I'm not standing right there watching them parent (like if I've wandered back into the kitchen out of sight, but not out of earshot), they are much more likely to be firm and direct with their child .

[daycare]

I put in a gate after a similar situation happened to me a few years ago -- 3yo dcg running all over my house screaming bloody murder while mom watched . Now I let the child through the gate and lock it behind them. If they throw a fit about something, I turn around and walk away. When mom or dad is here, I'm off the clock

I also find that if I'm not standing right there watching them parent (like if I've wandered back into the kitchen out of sight, but not out of earshot), they are much more likely to be firm and direct with their child .

yes that is a good point. parents do seem to take more control when i am out of sight. they also leave quicker. I think that maybe I need to stop chatting with the mom and when she tires to chat it up tell her that if she wants to talk to call me later or during the nap time the next day.

thanks for pointing that out. I am going to have to practice this more with this family...

[gelbesonn]

First of all.... just to make double check and offer another perspective... does this family have a food insecurity (trouble affording food at home). If so, you may want to think differently about how you address the situation.

Otherwise....
I agree with pp about charging her. The only time I send a kid with a meal/snack is if the parent comes to pick the child up at PM snack time. Since I am on the food program, I will ask the parent if they want me to pack something up that is car friendly.... but this is only one family that does this and I lovethis family.

I have set meal times. Sometimes the kids say they aren't hungry and don't want to eat. I remind them that this is meal time (usually happens at PM snack) and if they don't eat now, they may have water later, but need to wait until they go home to eat. Some kids will tell me later that they are hungry (usually my afterschool kids) and I will remind them of the rules. I would suggest doing this with the kid (enforcing the snack times) and then when he wants food at pick-up you can be the enforcer. When the mom insists on giving him a snack, tell her AND child: "Little Joey knows that snack time is over and if he wants something to eat he can get it at home. Little Joey... get ready to go really quick so you can go home and eat!"

[daycare]

First of all.... just to make double check and offer another perspective... does this family have a food insecurity (trouble affording food at home). If so, you may want to think differently about how you address the situation.

Otherwise....
I agree with pp about charging her. The only time I send a kid with a meal/snack is if the parent comes to pick the child up at PM snack time. Since I am on the food program, I will ask the parent if they want me to pack something up that is car friendly.... but this is only one family that does this and I lovethis family.

I have set meal times. Sometimes the kids say they aren't hungry and don't want to eat. I remind them that this is meal time (usually happens at PM snack) and if they don't eat now, they may have water later, but need to wait until they go home to eat. Some kids will tell me later that they are hungry (usually my afterschool kids) and I will remind them of the rules. I would suggest doing this with the kid (enforcing the snack times) and then when he wants food at pick-up you can be the enforcer. When the mom insists on giving him a snack, tell her AND child: "Little Joey knows that snack time is over and if he wants something to eat he can get it at home. Little Joey... get ready to go really quick so you can go home and eat!"

thanks for responding. NO, this family does not have money issues, i can reassure you of that.

I also never pack any food to go. A child eating in the car is not something that I want to contribute to. What if the child chokes while DCP is driving? Maybe I am a worry wart, but I like to reduce the probability of anything coming back on me, so no food to go. EVER.

And yes, you are right, I need to be the enforcer and speak up. I will be certain to remind them that they can eat at home..

Thank you all for all of the ammo. I need words, but what i think I really need is to cut them off from the start by not letting the child get back into my home area.

I need a better pick up routine.

1. have child ready to go if possible
2. when DCP knocks on the door, let them in grab child from DCroom and help them to their parent.
3. I am going to start walking away. I will tend to something else.
4. Send home more reports in writing so I dont have to chit chat. Or I can call mom later if it is that big of a deal.

Ugh... I said it, now I have to do it. I already know this, but when it comes time for me to do it, for some reason I cave in.....

[saved4always]

My dck's often think it is funny to run the other way when thier parent comes to pick up. Or they just don't want to go. I am always ready to scoop them up and take them to the door where their bag and coat is waiting. The parents always stay at the door cuz they have thier shoes on and are very polite not to walk more into the house with thier shoes one. Mine are all pretty light except the oldest one but he is the one who is always very happy to see mom.

[daycare]

My dck's often think it is funny to run the other way when thier parent comes to pick up. Or they just don't want to go. I am always ready to scoop them up and take them to the door where their bag and coat is waiting. The parents always stay at the door cuz they have thier shoes on and are very polite not to walk more into the house with thier shoes one. Mine are all pretty light except the oldest one but he is the one who is always very happy to see mom.

yes, this is the same exact thing here. no shoes on the carpet, so the parents stay at the entry way.

Also, all of the kids try to run and hide when someone knocks on teh door. It used to be that they would all run to the door, but now they hide and don't want to go home. I had one little girl hold on to my leg and scream cry she didnt want to leave. It made the mom cry....I felt bad....

[mickey2]

Time for nannyde's buh bye outside!!!

I would be telling mum that she needs to call when she is on her way and get the child ready to go and hand off at the door!

[beachgrl]

sorry I am laughing at your part of your post "piggly wiggly"???? I am assuming that is some kind of a quick mart?

The thing is that I did mention it to the mom and she just does not get it. I am starting to think that maybe I need another gate. One that when the parents arrive will not allow the child to go back into the rest of my house...

This child walks all over mom and it seems like mom is the voice of reason for the child for all of the wrong reason..

Really, the mom is very nice, just clueless.

Piggly Wiggly...or hoggly woggly as I like to call it is a grocery store ...They have shirts with their logo Pig on them that say "Big on the Pig" haha

[daycare]

Piggly Wiggly...or hoggly woggly as I like to call it is a grocery store ...They have shirts with their logo Pig on them that say "Big on the Pig" haha

that sounds super funny.....

[Hunni Bee]

SHOW MOM HOW TO PARENT

Jonathon Michael! Get up off that floor and stop your ugly attitude! you don't act that way when moms working, you won't do it with her here.

Then to mom, no I'm sorry. I do not reward bad behavior with food or attention. Now would you like me to put him in time out for his tantrum or are you carrying him to the car?

lovethislovethislovethis love this!

I've said similar before. The mom thanked me.

[Hunni Bee]

I have a family that is some what new. Been here a few months.
Lately, the DCP will show up early to pick up the child an hour or so early, but then all of a sudden next thing I know the kid has made his way to my kitchen and is getting himself something to eat or demanding a drink.

I let it happen once before by mistake and when it attempted to happen again last week, I cut it off immediately. I tell the child sorry, snack time was 45 min ago, the kitchen is closed, you need to go home now. Oh btw, I have a NO shoe policy and he had his shoes on full of sand dumping sand all over my entire house. I then tell him, you need to get your shoes off in the house please.

As soon as my words leave my mouth, the child throws himself down kicking and screaming. AND here is where it gets ugly. Mom gets down on her knees and says oh no, are you ok, awe poor baby. Looks up at me and says can you please get him a snack??????????

REALLY???? I have never dealt with a child like this or a parent like this. I tend to be a push over at times, but then when I get fed up, I tend to take it too far. When this happened, I said loudly and clearly, it's time for you to go home. BUT then mom says oh well, you don't close for another hour.......


HOw many buttons are they going to push on me in one day???

I know some of you have had to deal with parents and children like this...Please please please help me before I lose it......

Oh and thank you in advance for your thoughts, opinion and advice...

I had a similar problem a couple months back. Maybe this thread will help.

http://https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=39100

[Childminder]

No one goes off of the rug by the front door with shoes on, no one!

Next time the child does the snack thing say: "But mommy wants to take you to McDonalds".