Study on Effects of Spanking

[Crystal]

I didn't spank my own children and would never do so with a DCK.

On one hand I agree with the study and I disagree with spanking. However, I still think that, within reason, parents should be able to discipline thier children as they see fit. We all have our own philosophy of child rearing and I don't think it's "big brother's" business, so long as the line isn't crossed into abuse territory.

I am really curious to see what they end up doing with this and what the outcome will be because of this study, if anything at all.

[mac60]

I have started and stopped so many times in reply to this article.

I don't agree with it and think it's a bunch of hog wash. ::

That said, there's a big difference between a swat on the behind and a downright butt beating.

In my generation's day we were all given a swat when we didn't behave, we were taught to respect our elders and while there was the occasional wild child in school, it wasn't like the children of today.

When I first started working in a Daycare my eyes were opened big time.

Just my (not so humble) opinion.

I agree with you 100%.

[AfterSchoolMom]

I agree with Kadiddle Care and Mac60. Sorry, I know it's not popular opinion.

I would never spank someone else's child. I have and will spank my own, and they know it. We also have a very loving and close relationship...and they're both incredibly smart. They also know how to follow rules and how to respect adults.

If someone else can produce well mannered, respectful children without spanking them, then that's great! I feel it's a personal family choice, as it should remain.

[SilverSabre25]

My opinion on spanking aside...

I think that the big key--and one that no research study *I* know of has addressed, is how the spanking is carried out and how often the child is spanked. Spanked for every little misbehavior, the way we redirect daycare kids, with no talk or explanation, almost certainly has a more deleterious effect than spankings given mainly for major offenses, with explanations (the way you're supposed to talk before and after a time out).

[MrsB]

I definately think that is a personal desicion too. I think it depends on the child too. I have 4 and 1 of mine gets the point with the spanking. The other 3 it just isnt effective. I think parents need to remember that what works for one child wont work for another.

I live in a corporal punishment is allowed and parents can give authorization to others to use it too whether it be a daycare provider or teacher. Although I have been in situations where I thought to myself, if this was my kid a swat is what she needs to get her attention that I mean business, I wouldnt dream of it. Instead I have strict guidelines, am always consistent, and I Follow through.

I think part of the problem today is parents have a hard time telling their kids no and following through. Parents want their kids approval. Almost like they are looking for affirmation from their kids that they are a good parent. Which is just crazy. They ask their kids to do something instead of telling them to do it. Sometimes I want to scream at parent, "Hello! Your children are looking to you for guidance and direction, not where kids and parents sit down and come up with a plan on how they are going to be raised!" I am not really sure why parents approach raising their kids with this attitude. I am guessing, but maybe out of guilt because they spend so many hours out of the home?

I'm sure alot of you have the same thing, where the kids are for the most part well behaved when they are with you, and then mom/dad walk in the door and they turn into someone completely different! What cracks me up is watching a parent sit there and reason with a 2 year old! LOL. Now that right there is my comic relief for the day!

[countrymom]

I agree with Kadiddle Care and Mac60. Sorry, I know it's not popular opinion.

I would never spank someone else's child. I have and will spank my own, and they know it. We also have a very loving and close relationship...and they're both incredibly smart. They also know how to follow rules and how to respect adults.

If someone else can produce well mannered, respectful children without spanking them, then that's great! I feel it's a personal family choice, as it should remain.

I agree too. I seriously think that if more parents learned to discipline their children better there wouldn't be so many mouthy, rude.....you get the picture, kind of children. I mean, who tries to hit their mom in subway because she didn't get mayo on his sub, and he was 9yrs old.

[Kaddidle Care]

Forgot to add that I would not spank someone else's child. That is up to the parent(s) to decide.

I would not be happy if someone else (in school) spanked my child either although I did tell family members with my first that if he did anything bad enough they had my permission. This was said in front of him to make sure he didn't try any stunts.

[littlemissmuffet]

I was spanked as a child and I'm no worse off for it. As a matter of fact, I was never spanked for the same reason twice

I will spank my own child. I have spanked my sister's children. I would never spank anyone else's children, however, and I would be livid if I found out that anyone outside my family (school, daycare, etc) spanked my child.

I agree with the PPs who say it should be a personal decision.

[Unregistered]

I was never spanked as a child and also was a very obedient and good kid. There are other ways to discipline kids besides spanking, it just takes more time and patience.

Unless you are a perfect human with a doctorate in psychology there is no way to know how spanking has affected your life.

[Michelle]

Prisons are full of people that were never spanked or spanked too much,beaten,etc.
A really good book on discipline is Dare to discipline by Dr. Dopson and also The Strong Willed Child.
I had a friend that was beaten so severely as a child that she refused to discipline her children at all and the oldest was arrested at 11 and both have been suspended from school and kicked out of every daycare they were in... including mine.

So, there is a happy medium and not every child needs to be spanked, just depends on the child. There is a right way and a wrong way to spank.
Love, hugs and talking needs to follow.