DCG Wanted To Make Cupcakes

[Heidi]

Sometimes my own kids (7 & 4) will want to do something. Play a game, go to the playground etc. But, there are times I can't full fill their requests. It's not being mean. But kids have to learn that they can't always do what they want.

You are 100% there, lady, and with the added info, I think you did the right thing! Sorry if you felt misunderstood when you just wanted to vent!

[melskids]

Melissa Ann, with that added information, I understand why you declined.
I didn't realize the entire situation from your original post.

Obviously the real issue wasn't baking, it was with the mother's behavior.

Like I said, I wasnt trying to chastise you for anything...just adding another perspective.

Me too. I hope you dont think I was judging you.

I guess I took it the wrong way at first. I pictured this cute little perfect innocent cherub of a girl bouncing in the house all excited wanting to make cupcakes. Not always the case, huh?!

I agree with not giving them everything they want all the time, and I would probably have wanted to teach her a little delayed gradification myself.

[mac60]

I know many of us have birthday celebrations for the kids. I always have, mostly cupcakes or muffins and sing Happy Birthday, very simple. I don't have a problem with that, always done it probably always will. But why oh why, when little Johnny goes to "real preschool", he takes all kinds of special treats for his birthday, but never to daycare. Why is it not important for the daycare family too. I do understand Blackcat your point that the child is the one who is hurting because mom "just doesn't have time", but really I can no longer make "mom's problem mine.

I will say, that I am sure many of us go above and beyond what is actually "expected" of a daycare provider, like when I had a school kid and his mom never sent him hat and gloves, or in a warm shirt, or in regular socks.....So as a provider and a loving caring person, I bought him hat and gloves that were left at my home for him to use each day, I bought him socks so that he would have socks that covered above his ankles when he stood out in the snow waiting for the bus, and I bought him sweatshirts to put over the tee shirt his mom would put on him when it was frigid cold, all because I cared and his mom was simply stupid for lack of better terms. It takes a special kind of person to do this job, and I think once we do it for years, we learn that we just sometimes have to say no. Not because we don't care, but because maybe it just simply wasn't in the plans that day.

Didn't mean to take over the thread here, just some things I was thinking about as I read thru the posts.

[Heidi]

I know many of us have birthday celebrations for the kids. I always have, mostly cupcakes or muffins and sing Happy Birthday, very simple. I don't have a problem with that, always done it probably always will. But why oh why, when little Johnny goes to "real preschool", he takes all kinds of special treats for his birthday, but never to daycare. Why is it not important for the daycare family too. I do understand Blackcat your point that the child is the one who is hurting because mom "just doesn't have time", but really I can no longer make "mom's problem mine.

I will say, that I am sure many of us go above and beyond what is actually "expected" of a daycare provider, like when I had a school kid and his mom never sent him hat and gloves, or in a warm shirt, or in regular socks.....So as a provider and a loving caring person, I bought him hat and gloves that were left at my home for him to use each day, I bought him socks so that he would have socks that covered above his ankles when he stood out in the snow waiting for the bus, and I bought him sweatshirts to put over the tee shirt his mom would put on him when it was frigid cold, all because I cared and his mom was simply stupid for lack of better terms. It takes a special kind of person to do this job, and I think once we do it for years, we learn that we just sometimes have to say no. Not because we don't care, but because maybe it just simply wasn't in the plans that day.

Didn't mean to take over the thread here, just some things I was thinking about as I read thru the posts.

It's in our nature to be givers, I think. I know sometimes when "visitors" read the negative threads here, that is all they see. We don't go around bragging about how we bought someone gloves, or that we cooked a dinner for our daycare families with the kids to give a working mom a night off (I did that once, but I'm not bragging..).

It's one thing to change plans quickly to make a child who doesn't expect much happy, but to be expected to change plans for a mother and a child who pretty much demand it is another thing.

I think everyone has one common quality. We all want to GIVE things, not have it TAKEN. What a huge difference, eh?

[countrymom]

you did nothing wrong. That mom is really missing out making those cupcakes with her dd. I do alot of baking all the time. I do it with the dck's or my own children. But if I already have things planned for the day, well if *I* have time then we will do other things.
By the sounds of it, I don't think the mom was just saying that she was tired, she was saying that, "oh, since your home and have nothing to do then you can make them with suzy" and where did her dd get the idea of cupcakes, I know kids think of crazy things, but I have a feeling that this was planned.

[youretooloud]

If I were already planning to bake today, I would have also said no. Bread is enough for one day's work, and the extra bowls and clean up wouldn't appeal to me on a Friday.

Heck, I don't even like to give the kids lunch on Friday, much less bake cakes.