Gonna Be One Of Those Days :( Advice Please

[wahmof3]

Ok so I have a 2yr dcg who never eats for me and I'm curious as to how all of you would handle this bc I'm at the end of my rope.

Breakfast: as soon as I put breakfast on the table she starts crying- I don't mean wimper it's a full-blown cry. EVERYDAY and no matter what I am serving. She won't even drink her milk.

Lunch: Same thing cry, cry, cry no matter what I serve and IF she tries it she gags herself & then spits it out. She will drink her milk.

Snack: typically snack is a whole different ball game. My guess is she is starving by then and will eat her snack. And she will down her milk like there's no tomorrow.

So in my program I follow food program guidelines: I offer it, if they don't eat I don't force them. What I can't take in this situation is the constant full blown crying. She has made herself sick bc she gets so worked up.

Also how do you handle the snack situation?

On the days where we have a fun snack- do you give her a cookie when she hasn't touched any of the healthier stuff all day?

Do I just eliminate the sweet treats that we have every now & then? Why should the dck who are eating suffer?

TIA

btw- I think its the same situation at home & can you believe that dcm let dcg walk into my house yesterday with a bag of snack crackers??? Knowing I am struggling with this?????

[Cat Herder]

Sounds like she is living on a full treat diet. She knows if she just holds out, she will get her treats.

I'd most likely swap my snacks to fruits, veggies and proteins for a while.

Sandwich Ham (any meat, really) & Cheese Tortilla Rolls (heated + melty)

Vanilla Yogurt w/ sliced strawberries

Cottage cheese and peaches

Things of that nature...put a few cupcake sprinkles on them if you have to. I do all the time. The other kids won't "suffer" since their bodies are growing, too, and could really benefit longterm.

I'd ONLY ever give "Treat" snacks for Friday afternoon snacks or b-day parties until I had all good eaters.

Every so often I have to go back to this plan as well....especially during the holidays when I tend to bake WAYYYYYY too much and start to create my own little monsters. ::

[wahmof3]

Sounds like she is living on a full treat diet. She knows if she just holds out, she will get her treats.

I'd most likely swap my snacks to fruits, veggies and proteins for a while.

Sandwich Ham (any meat, really) & Cheese Tortilla Rolls (heated + melty)

Vanilla Yogurt w/ sliced strawberries

Cottage cheese and peaches

Things of that nature...put a few cupcake sprinkles on them if you have to. I do all the time. The other kids won't "suffer" since their bodies are growing, too, and could really benefit longterm.

I'd ONLY ever give "Treat" snacks for Friday afternoon snacks or b-day parties until I had all good eaters.

Every so often I have to go back to this plan as well....especially during the holidays when I tend to bake WAYYYYYY too much and start to create my own little monsters. ::

I REALLY like the sprinkles idea def gonna try this! The healthy snacks get thrown away with her. Unless its a snack cracker or cookie.

[Blackcat31]

On the days where we have a fun snack- do you give her a cookie when she hasn't touched any of the healthier stuff all day?

Do I just eliminate the sweet treats that we have every now & then? Why should the dck who are eating suffer?

TIA

btw- I think its the same situation at home & can you believe that dcm let dcg walk into my house yesterday with a bag of snack crackers??? Knowing I am struggling with this?????

As far as eliminating all sweet treats and fun snacks, I wouldn't do that to the others who do deserve a fun treat. I have no issue serving one child somehting fun and serving my non-lunch eaters crackers instead.

I would also talk with mom and tell her NO FOOD FROM HOME. I would thank her for her generosity but politely decline.

[Meyou]

I agree with the pp's but wanted to add to watch her milk intake closely. She's holding out but making due with milk between meals. If you offer water she might have more room for food. I'm not sure how that works with the food program though.

[Blackcat31]

I agree with the pp's but wanted to add to watch her milk intake closely. She's holding out but making due with milk between meals. If you offer water she might have more room for food. I'm not sure how that works with the food program though.

No problem there, the food program only requires milk to be served with meals.

Snacks can be water if they also include 2 components from other food groups. For example, we can have fruit, graham crackers and water for snack.

[meganlavonnesmommy]

Food is a non-issue. It is not your job to make them eat, only to offer healthy choices. Serve the food, if she cries, she gets down from the table. Simple as that. I definately wouldnt serve milk with snacks. We only have water or juice with snacks. Treats are only for fridays, we have cookies in the afternoons. Otherwise snacks are healthy options.

Also, dont give the kids milk until they have started eating. Or they will drink all the milk, and not want any food.

I serve the food in this order: veggies, meat or protein, bread, fruit, then milk. I take my time serving, so they have time to start eating what is on their plate before the next part is served. By the time I am done serving all the componants, they usually have eaten the veggie. If I dont do this, they eat all the fruit, drink the milk, and wont eat anything else.

[Cat Herder]

I agree with the pp's but wanted to add to watch her milk intake closely. She's holding out but making due with milk between meals. If you offer water she might have more room for food. I'm not sure how that works with the food program though.

Good catch..... I could not agree more.

After all that she should either eat or get down. I would not give her any extra attention for it, positive or negative.

Hopefully it will be self limiting.

Blackcat... We actually have a rule stating we cannot withhold any part of snack from any child. If I give one kid an oreo, they all have to have one....as long as they are over 12 months. That was the day I got rid of oreos.

[wdmmom]

I currently have a 3 year old that does this.

1.) He cries and he's removed from the table. After being removed, he realized he'd much rather sit and talk with his friends than be removed.

2.) Breakfast is hit and miss with him. His parents feed him before he comes so this is like a morning snack for him.

3.) Lunch is another story. He will only eat certain meat, he won't eat any fruit other than pears or bananas and he'll always drink his milk. I don't make the kids eat anything they don't want to but I do suggest they try it. He's finally been trying things and come to find out, he likes more than he's led on. For a week straight, I stopped offering the usual snack to him and would offer him lunch again during snack time hoping this would change his mind. He still won't eat meatloaf but he will try just about anything else!

[Blackcat31]

Good catch..... I could not agree more.

After all that she should either eat or get down. I would not give her any extra attention for it, positive or negative.

Hopefully it will be self limiting.

Blackcat... We actually have a rule stating we cannot withhold any part of snack from any child. If I give one kid an oreo, they all have to have one....as long as they are over 12 months. That was the day I got rid of oreos.

Wow! That is a drag!!

We can serve each and every child in care a completely different meal and/or snack as long as each child is getting the recommended serving sizes and food components.

:confused: I am really disliking how a federally funded program can vary so much from state to state or from agency to agency through interpretation.

[Cat Herder]

Wow! That is a drag!!

We can serve each and every child in care a completely different meal and/or snack as long as each child is getting the recommended serving sizes and food components.

:confused: I am really disliking how a federally funded program can vary so much from state to state or from agency to agency through interpretation.

Nah....it is a State reg. "Emotional Abuse", "Degrading", "Humiliating" were the words thrown around.

I am also "encouraged" to find ways to make sure kids with allergies are not served different foods from the group. "Social Isolation" was the term given during this class.

I am not on the food program.

[Blackcat31]

Nah....it is a State reg. "Emotional Abuse", "Degrading", "Humiliating" were the words thrown around.

I am not on the food program.

aha, everyone gets a trophy mentality...

[wahmof3]

I am so glad I found this forum! I love that I have found such a great resource! happyface

Lunch today didn't consist of tears, but dcg only ate applesauce. Didn't even touch her pizza. But she didn't cry & I'm ok with that

I don't think our food program says that everyone has to have the same snack just within the guidelines. I can only serve a sweet treat, cookie, only twice in 1 week. Which were lucky to get a cookie once a week. IMO- I kinda look at snack crackers, goldfish, granola bars, etc as a "sweet treat" when you didn't eat any breakfast or lunch. Hope that makes sense.

I'm going to limit her milk. Trouble is my dcp think they need to bring their sippy's full of milk or juice- no matter how many times I tell them not too. I believe they think its a comfort thing & that if they don't bring it the dck will just be miserable! So it will be addressed (again) that food including sippy's will not be brought into child care.

As far as removing her from the table: I have tried that. She still cries. My setup is we eat breakfast & snack at my playroom table and lunch is at my dinner table. So if I remove her from the playroom table & she is still crying, she is still disrupting the other kids while they eat. I don't know what to do! She starts crying even before I serve breakfast, so she knows its coming.

Thanks again- you all ROCK!!!!

[Blackcat31]

I am so glad I found this forum! I love that I have found such a great resource! happyface

Lunch today didn't consist of tears, but dcg only ate applesauce. Didn't even touch her pizza. But she didn't cry & I'm ok with that

I don't think our food program says that everyone has to have the same snack just within the guidelines. I can only serve a sweet treat, cookie, only twice in 1 week. Which were lucky to get a cookie once a week. IMO- I kinda look at snack crackers, goldfish, granola bars, etc as a "sweet treat" when you didn't eat any breakfast or lunch. Hope that makes sense.

I'm going to limit her milk. Trouble is my dcp think they need to bring their sippy's full of milk or juice- no matter how many times I tell them not too. I believe they think its a comfort thing & that if they don't bring it the dck will just be miserable! So it will be addressed (again) that food including sippy's will not be brought into child care.

As far as removing her from the table: I have tried that. She still cries. My setup is we eat breakfast & snack at my playroom table and lunch is at my dinner table. So if I remove her from the playroom table & she is still crying, she is still disrupting the other kids while they eat. I don't know what to do! She starts crying even before I serve breakfast, so she knows its coming.

Thanks again- you all ROCK!!!!

Glad you are finding help within the masses!

As far as the food and sippy's from home, don't address it again...ENFORCE it from now on. If it is in your policies to not allow it, hand them immediatley back to the parent at drop off and say "Sorry, I don't allow food or cups from home." the parents can keep it in the car for the looooong rides home most these kids have

[LittleD]

As far as removing her from the table: I have tried that. She still cries. My setup is we eat breakfast & snack at my playroom table and lunch is at my dinner table. So if I remove her from the playroom table & she is still crying, she is still disrupting the other kids while they eat. I don't know what to do! She starts crying even before I serve breakfast, so she knows its coming.

Thanks again- you all ROCK!!!!

I wouldn't bring her to the table. I would tell the kids that it's snack/lunch and have them seat themselves. Ask her if she is joining everyone. It may be a power struggle thing of you 'forcing' her to the table? put her snack where she would sit and let her come to the table on her own. It may work!