Drop In DCB That Won’t Do Anything At All

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

He is 3yrs old and it is his 2nd time here, and he started out the day running down the street crying from his mom.

Freaked out when she tried to leave. I told her to just go, he will be fine.

He has been sitting in the corner since 8:30 this morning, pouting and crying.

Everytime I ask him something he says no, even when no is not even an answer for the question.

He wont play with anyone but his 1.5 yr old brother. (he is fine btw)

He has peed himself already.

Do I tell mom at pick up time that he just doesnt like being here or keep trying?

[daycare]

He is 3yrs old and it is his 2nd time here, and he started out the day running down the street crying from his mom.

Freaked out when she tried to leave. I told her to just go, he will be fine.

He has been sitting in the corner since 8:30 this morning, pouting and crying.

Everytime I ask him something he says no, even when no is not even an answer for the question.

He wont play with anyone but his 1.5 yr old brother. (he is fine btw)

He has peed himself already.

Do I tell mom at pick up time that he just doesnt like being here or keep trying?

do not call mom. Calling her is basically telling her that you cant do your job with her child.

You have to think about how scared this child must feel. There is not routine here and this child does not know what to expect. I do not offer drop in care for this reason. There is no consistency for the child, therefore they usually do not ever adapt to the environment.

I would just try to comfort the child until the mom arrives. I would also tell mom that more than likely the child will do not do well there on an inconsistent drop in basis and that if the mom could enroll the child like 3 consistent days a week, that the child would eventually adapt to everything.

Otherwise, I would let the kid go.

[cheerfuldom]

i agree with daycare but also, if you have to keep going with the drop ins, why not give it a few more times and see if he warms up a bit. as long as he is not being hugely disruptive, why not just let him sit wherever he wants? if he is pouting, no big deal. you know he is safe and can come participate when he is ready.

[daycare]

oh one other thing that I forgot to add, is maybe you can see if the mom would be willing to have him attend for about a week straight, this way he could get more comfortable with everyone and used to the routine/rules.

Keep it consistent. If he attends drop in full day, then have him attend full day for one week straight. This way he understand naps....



I did this for one of my DCG that had a really hard time attending 3 days a week. I discounted the week for the DCP and it really did make a huge difference.

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

I have tryed to comfort him and he just freaks out.

We have tryed to go outdoors today and he freaks out. the only thing has has joined us with is eating.

[daycare]

I have tryed to comfort him and he just freaks out.

We have tryed to go outdoors today and he freaks out. the only thing has has joined us with is eating.

and eating is usually the hard part.... If he is eating then he trust you already..... Just keep trying...

If you are frustrated from the crying, try to give yourself a time out so that you can regain your composure. This is what I do and it works for me. Plus I sing my heart out when there is a kid here that is a screamer.

[daycare]

I have tryed to comfort him and he just freaks out.

We have tryed to go outdoors today and he freaks out. the only thing has has joined us with is eating.

and eating is usually the hard part.... If he is eating then he trust you already..... Just keep trying...

If you are frustrated from the crying, try to give yourself a time out so that you can regain your composure. This is what I do and it works for me. Plus I sing my heart out when there is a kid here that is a screamer.

[Blackcat31]

I have tryed to comfort him and he just freaks out.

We have tryed to go outdoors today and he freaks out. the only thing has has joined us with is eating.

He may not act as if he enjoys daycare but I bet he is enjoying the fact that he is in control.

Do as you normally do. Make sure he hears and sees you having fun with his brother and eveyone else. He will come join in when he is ready. Let him sit and let him feel however he wants to feel. That is ok. Don't feel like you have to make sure he is having a good time.

My own DS was like that and he eventually warmed up to new places, people and things but it took some time.....and patience. But mostly it just took people to back off and let him do it in his own time.....kwim? Takes some kids more time than others to warm up.

[sahm2three]

He is 3yrs old and it is his 2nd time here, and he started out the day running down the street crying from his mom.

Freaked out when she tried to leave. I told her to just go, he will be fine.

He has been sitting in the corner since 8:30 this morning, pouting and crying.

Everytime I ask him something he says no, even when no is not even an answer for the question.

He wont play with anyone but his 1.5 yr old brother. (he is fine btw)

He has peed himself already.

Do I tell mom at pick up time that he just doesnt like being here or keep trying?

I would just go about your day as you normally do. He either joins or doesn't. But he is in control. Periodically ask him if he would like to join the group but then leave it at that. Let him see how much fun everyone is having! Good luck!

[Ariana]

oh one other thing that I forgot to add, is maybe you can see if the mom would be willing to have him attend for about a week straight, this way he could get more comfortable with everyone and used to the routine/rules.

Keep it consistent. If he attends drop in full day, then have him attend full day for one week straight. This way he understand naps....



I did this for one of my DCG that had a really hard time attending 3 days a week. I discounted the week for the DCP and it really did make a huge difference.

[countrymom]

I hate drop ins, hugs, they are the hardest group, this is why I don't do them anymore. They have to be regulars. I've had drop ins who have destroyed toys and trashed my house.

[kidkair]

I do drop ins from time to time and I just give them their space. I let them come to me when they are ready. I just pay attention to my regulars as usually and ask the new kid to come join every time we switch activities. Some drop ins I've let the parents know that their child doesn't like the spontaneous routine and maybe they need to think things through more. Many of the drop ins I've had over the years are only drop ins for a few months then I never hear from them again. I've never had a drop in become a part time or full time kid as of yet and there are few that I would have accepted if asked about the possibility. I only do drop-ins because I charge a bunch for them and use the money strictly for daycare toys so each day I have to deal with a drop in kid equals cool stuff for the daycare soon.

[Hunni Bee]

I only have one drop-in, thank God. And she's a peach.

But with those kids I do what I call "immersion therapy". If they've been here, three or more close-together days, I "herd" them through our day.

I give them a few to several days of seeing my face, the other kids faces, the room and watching the routine, and displaying their anger at being sent to daycare, if need be. If they are still a knot on a log by day four or five, they get herded and placed. Placed at circle time, placed on the potty, placed in the middle of playing kids, placed at lunch. And left alone. Its hard to remember to not do anything or cry when there are 9 other kids singing "Icky Sticky Bubblegum" (and doing the accompanying motions) at the top of their lungs. ::

Works 9 out of 10 times.