Ot. Divorced Parents/Chores With Kids

[sharlan]

Yes, that's what parents do. Fortunately, or unfortunately in her opinion, she's got 3 parents and they need to sit down and agree on the rules. She cannot continue to disrupt your home and family life with her attitude. Your eldest is right, it's not fair.

[Meyou]

From other posts regarding your daughter, it appears to me that she is starting to have an "entitled" attitude. Her wants and desires (outside activities) come first. It's time to give her an attitude adjustment.

IMHO, you need to sit down and have a meeting with your dh, yourself, your ex, AND her. You need to set some definite boundaries as her time spent with her father is having a negative impact on your home and family. You have to put a stop to that. I'm not saying that she should stop visiting with her father, but she needs to have respect for her home and family, too.

If she creates a mess, she doesn't leave with her father UNTIL her mess is cleaned up. If she doesn't do her chores, her father can sit and wait for her. She sees her father every 6 weeks or so, we're not talking once a year.

You've grown a back bone with your daycare, now develop one with your family.

I agree with this and you're not alone. My dd is almost 13, leaves the house at 8am everyday and doesn't get home until 8pm because she dances after school. It took awhile to strike a balance with her so that chores, homework, dance, school and time at her dads was all included. SHE also though chores should be dropped because she was soooooo busy. But I managed to work it out despite her objections and attitude.