New Foster Kids Visitation Question

[grandmom]

Two new children started at my program Friday. Foster children. F-mom told me someone would be coming Tu/Th to pick up children for visitation with parents. So last night a man left a message about "picking up some kids". Very vague and unprofessional on the phone. One the one hand, who else would call with that message but someone who is valid. On the other hand, I'm very wary of the birth father's intentions from stories I've heard already.

So this is what I'm going to do. Let me know if you think there's anything else, or if this is too much.

Meet him at the door, ask for business card and driver's license. Make copy of license. Take photo of car and license plate, ask him to sign children out with full legal signature.

I'm thinking of worst case scenario here. What if he isn't valid? And then someone asks me: who took them? Oh, some guy, he called and said he was coming. No, I want a full description of the man and his vehicle.

Any suggestions?

[mac60]

I would ask Foster mom for name, description, etc, before I left the kids leave with anyone. On the other hand, maybe this is something that should be done after daycare hours.

[jen]

I would call DCF and verify...they should be able to provide you with the name of the social worker who is coming to get the kids. Also, the social worker will most likely have a badge from DCF.

[MarinaVanessa]

I agree with both comments. I wouldn't take any chances either and I don't think that you're being too cautious. We've been warned in my county about a man claiming to be from community care licensing to get into a daycare home but the provider it happened to was always used to seeing the workers with a badge around their necks and since he didn't have one she asked him for one and he said he'd forgotten it in the car and went to "go get it" and never went back. I think it's smart of you to get a name from the foster mom or foster kids worker as to who is picking up the kids. Getting a copy of the driver's license is something that I do anyway even for people authorized to pick a child up so I think that even that isn't going overboard. And yes calling and confirming at the time of pick-up with foster care to make sure that it's the right person is also a good idea. You just never know.

[gbcc]

I don't mean to sound rude here, but....

Obviously there is something wrong with this dad for his children to be taken away by the state. Therefore, is it a good idea for him to know your address and have access to your property during business hours? I would not want this guy near my children and as a parent of a daycare child I would be concerned with a possible dangerous situation occuring. Worst case scenerio would be he arriving with a gun.

[GretasLittleFriends]

My enrollment form has a place for authorized persons allowed to pick up. If the person wanting to pick the child up is not on the authorized list I require a written note given to me from the parent/guardian at drop off. Along with a description of the person picking them up. Then when a stranger pulls into my drive way I meet them at the door, request their driver's license to verify who they are. I also note their make, model and lic plate. Assuming the license matches who they say they are and that is who the parent/guardian says is taking them I then call the parent/guardian and notify them that child left with "x".

[kitkat]

One of my part time jobs in college was to transport and supervise visitations. I worked through an non-profit organization that was contracted for this purpose. It was not through social services. I can't remember if the foster parents knew ahead of time who was coming, but they tried to keep us with the same family. We did not have ids, work clothes with company name, name badges, etc. But, that was 10 years ago and I'm hoping things have changed!

I think you are absolutely right to get copies and photos of EVERYTHING! Please call and verify the person if you aren't sure. You can't be too careful, especially since the kids are in foster care.

[grandmom]

Thanks for Input

Thanks so much everyone. So it turns out it's the same man who has been transporting them when they were at a different foster care home. Now they are in relative care, and he's still the transporter. He called while the children were being dropped off and the relative/guardian confirmed he was the same man he knew. Anyway, he is now added to the list, and I did ask to see his ID and driver's license.

gbcc, and all, I agree totally. I don't know what happened for these children to be removed, but the birth dad had previously insisted that he meet the transportation man here. I told the relative/guardian mom last night that I did not want the birth father here. There's no reason for him to be here.

In my state (WA) if the birth parents show up with ID and birth certificate, I MUST give the child to them, otherwise it's kidnapping on my part. So I've asked the relative/guardian to give me the paperwork that states the birth parents have lost legal custody. Then I can refuse them.

What a sad situation for the children. I'm so thankful they are now in stable relative/guardian care. I'm glad I've found a forum where I can get good advice. Thanks.