Possible Developmental Issues...Do You Tell Parents?

[SunflowerMama]

I have an almost 4 year old dcg and there have been a few things I've noticed that are causing a bit of concern.

She has no interest at all in crafts, coloring, or anything art related. When we do craft she'll put a couple of scribbles and ask to be done. I thought it was just her age...she started when she was 2, but will be 4 next month and nothing has changed in the last 2 years.

All my other kids are 3 -5 and I hate to compare but all the 4 and 5 year olds spend hours at the table drawing, writing and making projects but she just has no desire.

I wouldn't be too overly concerned but she also has problems following directions at times and when asked simple questions..."what color is this car?" she answer with an non-related answer..."Mommy and Daddy".

She's also unable to count past 7 and has no alphabet recognition even though these are things we go over every day. There is another little boy that is the same age ( a few days younger) and the difference is evident. I hate to compare children, and being a mom of twins I have seen how all kids develop at different rates, but she just seems a bit more behind. She was also very premature so that may be playing into it as well.

TO those with more experience do you think there could be a problem? Would you mention all these things to the parents? And how?

Any advice would be great! Thanks!!

[Ariana]

I would definately need more evidence to say she has a possible delay. She might just not be a bright kid kwim? I have a 3 yr old and she also hates anything art related, has trouble answering any kind of question and still cries at the drop of a hat. However I do not think she has a developmental delay she's just a little....hmmm how do I word this appropriately..."unsmart"?!! When I compare her to my 2 yr old there is a big difference and my DD is a year younger!

Are there any program in your area that might be able to help identify specific risk factors? Does she have an anxiety issue? With my 3 yr old I feel a lot of her issues are related to anxiety and lack of sleep and structure at home.

As for mentioning it to the parents it really depends on the parent. I had to term a 2 yr old for lack of language and a clear developmental delay. the parent was in complete denial and lied to me that she had taken him to see a SLP who said he was fine (yeah right!). With my 3 yr old I've mentoned things here and there to the mom but mom isn't interested. If you have a supportive mom who cares about her kids success I would refer her to a program for assessment. Definately don't diagnose the child with anything on your own.

[Heidi]

this is the most comprehensive developmental milestones list I found:

https://www.azdes.gov/main.aspx?menu=98&id=2452

I don't know if it's of any help

[e.j.]

When I have concerns about developmental issues, I mention my concerns to the parents and give them a written list of those concerns so they can run it by their pediatrician.

If it's nothing to be worried about, that's great. If the pediatrician agrees with me, then the child is refered for testing. The way I look at it, the sooner developmental issues are addressed, the better.

[Bookworm]

I'm with you

I have a boy in my class that I think has some "issues". While he has some letter/number recognition, he can't follow a 3 part instruction, he has trouble with simple art projects (cut and paste). The only time he can focus on anything is during tv time. Mom and dad know he has "issues" and asked for an evaluation on him. I let them know that we are not trained to do that and gave them info on where to go. They didn't like that and accused us of passing the buck and the info I could give, they didn't like what they heard. I'm saying all this to say that a lot of parents don't like to think that they didn't give birth to the next Einstein and will not receive any concerns about any type of delay. Over the 17 years of working with children the #1 response has been " well they do/don't act like that at home. Depending on your relationship with the parents, tread carefully. Good luck.

[Hunni Bee]

this is the most comprehensive developmental milestones list I found:

https://www.azdes.gov/main.aspx?menu=98&id=2452

I don't know if it's of any help

Hmmm...if one of my four-year-olds knew no more than three colors and was just beginning to play with other children, I'd be concerned.

I have those expectations for really young three year olds...maybe Im pushing mine too hard?

My kids are taught self-help and critical thinking from the moment they get to me. My youngest three-year-old, who just turned three on Nov. 30, is able to serve herself lunch, clean up her nap materials and use scissors correctly. My 3.5 year olds are able to operate the PC, completely dress themselves, and identify everyone's name in the room. So, I don't know....

[SilverSabre25]

this is the most comprehensive developmental milestones list I found:

https://www.azdes.gov/main.aspx?menu=98&id=2452

I don't know if it's of any help

holy cow either most of the kids I know are seriously ahead of the curve or that list is whacked.

No offense...

[Meyou]

holy cow either most of the kids I know are seriously ahead of the curve or that list is whacked.

No offense...

Ummm yeah. My 2 and 3 year olds can do the 5 year old list.

[Cat Herder]

holy cow either most of the kids I know are seriously ahead of the curve or that list is whacked.

No offense...

Maybe they are grading on a curve?

[Ariana]

holy cow either most of the kids I know are seriously ahead of the curve or that list is whacked.

No offense...

I think it shows that there needs to be serious issues for them to consider a child developmentally delayed. Some kids just aren't "bright" if you KWIM?!!