Interviews

[mac60]

Last week I interviewed with a family on Wednesday evening. They were here about 1 1/2 hours. We had talked on the phone prior to interview for probably 15 or more minutes. They told me they were going to bring their kids with them to the interview. They knew I had 2 dogs. So when they showed up last week, they did NOT have their children with them. 1 yr old and 3 yr old. They came alone, asked a lot of questions, etc. Seemed to be nice people, said would get back with me. So on Sunday they called me again. Wanted to know if they could bring the girls over to see/meet the dogs. We set up Wednesday evening (last night). They came at 6:30 and it was 8:00 before they left. GRRRRR. The girls did fine with the dogs.

In over 10 years, this is the first time I ever had a family "come back" a second time. It was also the first time I ever had a family not bring their child/children on the first interview. So family shows up at the door, and Grandma is with them. They come in and we go to the family room (dc room). Girls meet dogs, no problems, girls go off to play with the stuff. Then just turned 1 yr old starts crawling onto the kids chairs and sits on them backwards and starts rocking them back and forth. (She currently has a brace on her leg because she climbed onto something and fell). They don't stop her from rocking the chair or remove her, they just hold the chair enough it won't flip over. The 2 girls climbed onto and stood on the furniture with their shoes on quite a few times and parents did nothing. 1 yr old pulls the phone/answering machine off the endtable, they put it back but never tell her no.

I have one of those Little Playzones Sights and Sounds enclosed play areas I use daily for the under 2 age. Mom says, "What is this", who goes in there? I just said sometimes I put the little ones in there to play.......(I wanted to say you know, the ones that climb on stuff, stand on my furniture, pull the phones off the stand) Then the 3 yr old starts opening it up and mom hooks it together, next thing I know both kids, mom, and grandma are in it. OMG.

They were here almost 1 1/2 hours. Then when they left, mom says we are just looking for the best fit for the girls. We met another lady and it is going to be a very hard decision for us. I am thinking ok, I give up 2 evening in less than 2 weeks???????? You tell me on the phone you just wanted to see how the girls reacted to the dogs?????????? GRR.

Ok, from now on, I will request that children come for the first interview. I want to see how they act, and see how the parents parent. I don't think these girls are ever told NO. I think 1 1/2 hours was more than needed to meet the dogs. She asked me some of the same questions 2 or more times. How many children do you care for? (My own personal opinion on this question is----it is really none of your business as long as I stay in the guidelines....I don't ask you what you make per hour or how many hours you work or other questions that are none of my business).

While I do need to fill a spot in the fall, I am not sure this is the right family. I believe in discipline.....to which they have now asked me 3 times what I do for discipline. I have never had Grandma come along, and I have never had a family come back for a second interview. My hours are 6:30 to 5:00, and everyone is normally gone by 5:15, when I leave for college. She has asked me over 3 times if it would be a problem if it was closer to 5:30, to which I answered if it is once in a while and you let me know, that would be ok, but my day is done at 5 and I have to leave for school.

OK, I feel better just getting this off my chest.

[Pammie]

Wow!
If that's what the "interview" was like - imagine what it would be like working with them every day??
I believe that we have to trust our instincts when interviewing families - just as much as they have to trust theirs when interviewing us! For me, some families are just *too much*...and I have to simply tell them that I don't think we're a good match....and on to the next interview.
If she's pushing the 5:30 pick-up issue already, that would be a BIG red-flag for me...as would the lack of discipline....the apparently lack of consideration for MY time - in accommodating two such long meetings....
Good luck in whatever you decide to do - but some families simply aren't a good match:-)

[momofboys]

Last week I interviewed with a family on Wednesday evening. They were here about 1 1/2 hours. We had talked on the phone prior to interview for probably 15 or more minutes. They told me they were going to bring their kids with them to the interview. They knew I had 2 dogs. So when they showed up last week, they did NOT have their children with them. 1 yr old and 3 yr old. They came alone, asked a lot of questions, etc. Seemed to be nice people, said would get back with me. So on Sunday they called me again. Wanted to know if they could bring the girls over to see/meet the dogs. We set up Wednesday evening (last night). They came at 6:30 and it was 8:00 before they left. GRRRRR. The girls did fine with the dogs.

In over 10 years, this is the first time I ever had a family "come back" a second time. It was also the first time I ever had a family not bring their child/children on the first interview. So family shows up at the door, and Grandma is with them. They come in and we go to the family room (dc room). Girls meet dogs, no problems, girls go off to play with the stuff. Then just turned 1 yr old starts crawling onto the kids chairs and sits on them backwards and starts rocking them back and forth. (She currently has a brace on her leg because she climbed onto something and fell). They don't stop her from rocking the chair or remove her, they just hold the chair enough it won't flip over. The 2 girls climbed onto and stood on the furniture with their shoes on quite a few times and parents did nothing. 1 yr old pulls the phone/answering machine off the endtable, they put it back but never tell her no.

I have one of those Little Playzones Sights and Sounds enclosed play areas I use daily for the under 2 age. Mom says, "What is this", who goes in there? I just said sometimes I put the little ones in there to play.......(I wanted to say you know, the ones that climb on stuff, stand on my furniture, pull the phones off the stand) Then the 3 yr old starts opening it up and mom hooks it together, next thing I know both kids, mom, and grandma are in it. OMG.

They were here almost 1 1/2 hours. Then when they left, mom says we are just looking for the best fit for the girls. We met another lady and it is going to be a very hard decision for us. I am thinking ok, I give up 2 evening in less than 2 weeks???????? You tell me on the phone you just wanted to see how the girls reacted to the dogs?????????? GRR.

Ok, from now on, I will request that children come for the first interview. I want to see how they act, and see how the parents parent. I don't think these girls are ever told NO. I think 1 1/2 hours was more than needed to meet the dogs. She asked me some of the same questions 2 or more times. How many children do you care for? (My own personal opinion on this question is----it is really none of your business as long as I stay in the guidelines....I don't ask you what you make per hour or how many hours you work or other questions that are none of my business).

While I do need to fill a spot in the fall, I am not sure this is the right family. I believe in discipline.....to which they have now asked me 3 times what I do for discipline. I have never had Grandma come along, and I have never had a family come back for a second interview. My hours are 6:30 to 5:00, and everyone is normally gone by 5:15, when I leave for college. She has asked me over 3 times if it would be a problem if it was closer to 5:30, to which I answered if it is once in a while and you let me know, that would be ok, but my day is done at 5 and I have to leave for school.

OK, I feel better just getting this off my chest.

They sound difficult! And I have just one word: RUN!!!! Seriously though I think they would be micromanaging parents who want to know EVERYTHING that goes one & it seems like mom wants hours that are later. I wouldn't compromise on that but it sounds like the mom will push your hours. Just say NO!

[tymaboy]

Wow. I think if it was me, even if I had to fill a spot, I do not think I would be taking the family. Sounds like there were a few red flags.

[momma2girls]

Last week I interviewed with a family on Wednesday evening. They were here about 1 1/2 hours. We had talked on the phone prior to interview for probably 15 or more minutes. They told me they were going to bring their kids with them to the interview. They knew I had 2 dogs. So when they showed up last week, they did NOT have their children with them. 1 yr old and 3 yr old. They came alone, asked a lot of questions, etc. Seemed to be nice people, said would get back with me. So on Sunday they called me again. Wanted to know if they could bring the girls over to see/meet the dogs. We set up Wednesday evening (last night). They came at 6:30 and it was 8:00 before they left. GRRRRR. The girls did fine with the dogs.

In over 10 years, this is the first time I ever had a family "come back" a second time. It was also the first time I ever had a family not bring their child/children on the first interview. So family shows up at the door, and Grandma is with them. They come in and we go to the family room (dc room). Girls meet dogs, no problems, girls go off to play with the stuff. Then just turned 1 yr old starts crawling onto the kids chairs and sits on them backwards and starts rocking them back and forth. (She currently has a brace on her leg because she climbed onto something and fell). They don't stop her from rocking the chair or remove her, they just hold the chair enough it won't flip over. The 2 girls climbed onto and stood on the furniture with their shoes on quite a few times and parents did nothing. 1 yr old pulls the phone/answering machine off the endtable, they put it back but never tell her no.

I have one of those Little Playzones Sights and Sounds enclosed play areas I use daily for the under 2 age. Mom says, "What is this", who goes in there? I just said sometimes I put the little ones in there to play.......(I wanted to say you know, the ones that climb on stuff, stand on my furniture, pull the phones off the stand) Then the 3 yr old starts opening it up and mom hooks it together, next thing I know both kids, mom, and grandma are in it. OMG.

They were here almost 1 1/2 hours. Then when they left, mom says we are just looking for the best fit for the girls. We met another lady and it is going to be a very hard decision for us. I am thinking ok, I give up 2 evening in less than 2 weeks???????? You tell me on the phone you just wanted to see how the girls reacted to the dogs?????????? GRR.

Ok, from now on, I will request that children come for the first interview. I want to see how they act, and see how the parents parent. I don't think these girls are ever told NO. I think 1 1/2 hours was more than needed to meet the dogs. She asked me some of the same questions 2 or more times. How many children do you care for? (My own personal opinion on this question is----it is really none of your business as long as I stay in the guidelines....I don't ask you what you make per hour or how many hours you work or other questions that are none of my business).

While I do need to fill a spot in the fall, I am not sure this is the right family. I believe in discipline.....to which they have now asked me 3 times what I do for discipline. I have never had Grandma come along, and I have never had a family come back for a second interview. My hours are 6:30 to 5:00, and everyone is normally gone by 5:15, when I leave for college. She has asked me over 3 times if it would be a problem if it was closer to 5:30, to which I answered if it is once in a while and you let me know, that would be ok, but my day is done at 5 and I have to leave for school.

OK, I feel better just getting this off my chest.

Yes, I make sure the children come as well. I also had an interview with one child last 2 hrs.!!!!! She got outside to play on my swing set, because I opened the door to show the parents the backyard. What a mistake!! We finally had to tell them at 7:30 at night, that we had to do baths, and homework yet, and our daughter goes to be at 8:00 for school!!! We will never open the door again for anyone!!! I couldn't believe it, the Mom just talked and talked while the Dad played with the little girl for an hr. outside!!! UGHH!!!!!

[My4SunshineGirlsNY]

Wow, I believe in discipline too and by the sounds of it, I don't know if I would want to get involved with this family. Those girls sound like a handful!

[momma2girls]

I had 2 interviews that were really weird- one boy was infactuated with bugs- was here for over one hr. and the boy needed a bag to collect his bugs. He was outside the majority of the interview- he was 5 yrs. old. When his Mom told him he needed to come and go home. He had his bag full of bugs even moths- he came into the house without it being zipped locked, and a couple of them got out- UGHHH!!!!! I called the mother and said that this wouldn't work out for me!! LOL!!!!
Another interview was with a 4 yr. old- I believe had several diagnosis- I self diagnosed him in 5 min. of him being here. The family lived down in the same neighborhood as mine- came thru the front door with the mother, didn't take his shoes off at all and started running, opening all my cupboards, running wild, went running down my basement steps, OMG!!! They stayed for over an hr. this was the worse one ever!!!! You should have seen my house when they left!!! I wanted them out, the second he started to open all my cubboard, taking things out, then slamming each one. I finally had to take his hand and say no we don't do that here. My husband had to actually say something about needing to be somewhere in 5 min. or I am sure they would have been here longer!! I kindly told the Mom this wasn't going to work either. She acted very surprised- she was a stay at home mom looking into going back to work- I really don't think she was very bright either, because she hardly said anything to this little boy about anything he was doing!!! WOW!!!
THen to top things off this same boy came trick or treating at my house about a month later, and I was telling my Mom and Dad about this bad little boy that came for an interview- then while I am talking about him, he shows up trick or treating- I couldn't believe it!!! He ran into my living room, and I told him to go back by the door, I had to literally block past the door with my arms- WOW!!!!!

[Daycare Mommy]

Luckily some of those little guys with parents that don't discipline adjust and learn to behave themselves here. If I didn't accept families that don't discipline I'd be out of business! ::

But with them wanting to push your hours back and the two 2-hour interviews, I'd tread carefully. Before they start I'd tell them that you need pick-ups to be by ____PM (whatever is the latest time you will not be upset with them picking up every day) If she comes late once tell her that it's not acceptable and if she needs a daycare to watch her children even a minute after ____PM she needs to find one with a later closing time. Put her on she spot and tell her if she can't get her daughter picked up on time that is her notice or termination if you are sitll on trial.

I'd also make the trial period very clear, that either party can terminate for any reason within the first 2 weeks or however long you make it. So you'll have a clear and easy way out if they don't fit in with your program.

[momofsix]

Wow, I'm impressed you kept your cool throughout the whole long evening! If you really need the money, it's hard to turn someone down-especially two spots, but as others have said, be VERY strict with your policies. I'd set a hugely unreasonable late fee just for them, and enforce it right away if needed, since it sounds like that's one area they're going to push.
Keep us posted on this one!