Out Of Control Hugging?

[MissAnn]

Yep!
I have an out of control hugger. He hugged the not child friendly fire marshal. He hugs the kids so hard they fall over. He hugs every parent whether they want it or not......thus making a new rule.....only go to the door if it's YOUR mommy! He pounces on kids to hug them from behind.

Just wondering if any of you have an out of control hugger?

[MyAngels]

I'll be interested to see the replies on this one. I had a little guy once who started with me at about 18 months and left at 4. He would hug the other kids so hard he would literally shake with the effort . We talked constantly about not hugging so hard, asking before hugging, etc. I had to teach all the other kids to hold up their hands (in a talk to the hand type gesture ) and say "No hugs today Johnny, thank you."

Thankfully it lessened as he got older, but never did completely go away.

[Country Kids]

Actually I don't encourage hugging amoungst the kiddos. Probably sounds mean and harsh but most of the time they can't balance correctly and go crashing to the floor. Someone always bumps heads, hits head on toy, knocks over a child that was just passing by, etc..... So it just never seems to work out with the whole hugging thing!

[hoopinglady]

I have a child who doesn't respect personal space. He doesn't always hug, sometimes he will push or ram people, .

Still, probably the same concept. I will talk about and demonstrate how to properly greet people at circle time and have them practice.

When he starts to run to someone, I say, "remember how to say hello" or "N, can you say hello and shake their hand", "would you like to say hello to so and so's mommy?"

[Heidi]

I am thinking about banning the practice here as well! 4 sibs-hugging always turns into hair pulling and wrestling.

I might have to change "quick hug...then go play" to "hugs are for at home", but I really hate to do that....

[MissAnn]

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I have a child who doesn't respect personal space. He doesn't always hug, sometimes he will push or ram people, .

You reminded me of another kid I have. He scratches his head. There is not lice or anything like that. He looks like a monkey. Often he reaches over and starts scratching his neighbor's head too! That never goes over well. This boy is going to Kindergarten next year!

[MissAnn]

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Actually I don't encourage hugging amoungst the kiddos

Neither do I. I just can't seem to break this kid of it. He thinks everyone loves it.....and doesn't seem to realize that the "stop it' that comes from other kids actually applies to HIM. I think it can quickly become a form of passive aggressive bullying. Especially when he pounces on another kids back and then claims he was "just hugging".

What about kissing? I don't allow that either.....for several reasons. Germs.....and the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing.

[Blackcat31]

I had one of those once too. She would run up to the other parents upon pick up and hug them or say "Huggie, please" before a child could pass by her or she would ask for a hug from a kid while the kid and parent were leaving.

At first I thought it was a bit cute but after a few parents started to complain about it, I had a discussion with her mom about it and how the other parents and kids were kind of put off by this hugging (sadly because the child was kind of unkempt).

But on a positive note it was a good time for her mom to talk with her about appropriate touching/hugging/kissing. So it was all good.

[nannyde]

I wouldn't allow him to do it at all. When he goes to hug... separate him and turn him AWAY from you and the other kid and say

LEAVE IT

Go play toys

When you say "leave it" sound hard on the T part of "it" so it sounds like "lee-VIT"

He's not hugging he's capturing. It looks sweet as pie when you first see it but your gut knows it isn't about hugging.. it's about HAVING something right there. He's most likely highly encouraged to do it with family, friends, etc. With praise and encouragement he's taken a hug to a capture.

So do what you do when he captures something he's NOT supposed to have:

Leave it... telling him what to do right now.

Go play toys... give him what you DO want him to do.

[MissAnn]

I wouldn't allow him to do it at all. When he goes to hug... separate him and turn him AWAY from you and the other kid and say

LEAVE IT

Go play toys

When you say "leave it" sound hard on the T part of "it" so it sounds like "lee-VIT"

He's not hugging he's capturing. It looks sweet as pie when you first see it but your gut knows it isn't about hugging.. it's about HAVING something right there. He's most likely highly encouraged to do it with family, friends, etc. With praise and encouragement he's taken a hug to a capture.

So do what you do when he captures something he's NOT supposed to have:

Leave it... telling him what to do right now.

Go play toys... give him what you DO want him to do.

You hit the nail on the head! I'm sure I will have a moment to practice iT tomorrow!