Putting Your Own Child In Daycare

[learn-n-grow]

FWIW~ I put my own 2 yr old son in another daycare while I ran mine. I did have my priorities straight and knew it was the best thing for him.

He went to another daycare 2 days a week for half days. He needed to experience a bit of independence without his mother hovering nearby and he was one of those kids that respnded well to others but not necessarily to me since I was(am) his mother. As providers we all can attest to how differently children behave for their parents compared to a provider/teacher etc.

It had nothing to do with me not being able to handle my child or his ability to learn and behave but it did have everything to do with the fact that he needed a bit of space and he needed to be able to have something of his own.

Also, no matter what anyone says, we all treat our children a bit differently because they are ours and rather than fight with him continually about what hat mommy was wearing at the moment, I enrolled him in a child care center where he could have some friends, some space and a place where he was a regular child and not Miss C's son" or "mommy's little guy".

I can completely understand.

Thanks for understanding!

[learn-n-grow]

I couldn't agree more.

I couldn't disagree more!

[AmandasFCC]

My daughter goes to preschool 2 afternoons/week. I've seriously considered sending her to daycare. Same as what Blackcat said, she responds well to others but she appears to be deaf to Mommy. And I do believe that good daycares have a lot to offer in terms of socialization. I know that I've done a good job - the preschool tells me so, and the other kids are great - but my daughter just doesn't show it on her own turf.

[erinalexmom]

I did come home to do daycare to spend time with my kids. But that being said there were reasons that have to do with "family time" that were not actually daytime hours. When I was working all the time things werent getting done like the laundry, dishes, school work,ect. So now I do all that stuff as I can throughout the day and I am able to spend the time with my family in the evenings.
My son goes to preschool 2 days a week and I dont feel one once of guilt about it. He needs it and I will totally admit that I need the break!

[mismatchedsocks]

If I felt the need to bring my child to a daycare, I would first find one i reallly liked. Then be upfront with them and let them know you are flexible. Maybe you can be a fill in for a parttime opening, maybe you will meet someone you can meet for play dates, or get a break in pay for filling those little slots??

I know I would accept another daycare providers child, especially if it was part time and flexible. I know if the child was sick they could stay home, I know holidays, etc will be expected off and know they they will respect me, ( i woudl hope!)

[Kaddidle Care]

I couldn't agree more.

Thank you.

I'm not against 3-4 year old PreSchool or 4-5 year old PreK for a few hours a week for same age socialization and education.

At 2 a baby still needs Mommy. I just hate to see work (of any kind) getting in the way of Motherhood.

I have an old fashioned opinion and am just stating it openly.

Taking on other people's children so that you can stay home with your own is great. Shipping your own to someone else so that you can take care of other people's children is just ironic. Sorry, I just don't get it.

(And no, I didn't have perfect angels for children but I didn't take care of more than 2 other children besides my own either.)

[Preschool/daycare teacher]

If I felt the need to bring my child to a daycare, I would first find one i reallly liked. Then be upfront with them and let them know you are flexible. Maybe you can be a fill in for a parttime opening, maybe you will meet someone you can meet for play dates, or get a break in pay for filling those little slots??

I know I would accept another daycare providers child, especially if it was part time and flexible. I know if the child was sick they could stay home, I know holidays, etc will be expected off and know they they will respect me, ( i woudl hope!)

I would want the other daycare to be on specific days, with regular hours, rather than a drop-in whenever they had an open spot that day. I would think it'd be harder for your child to get used to being somewhere else, and it'd be harder for you as the parent and daycare provider yourself, to arrange your own daycare schedule if you never knew exactly when you could bring your child to the other daycare.

I think it could be very beneficial for your child to attend another daycare a couple days a week, if you can find one accepting part timers. If you found one offering preschool for 2 yr olds that'd be an even bigger plus! The owner at my daycare/preschool had her daughter with her everyday at her daycare, and I really believe for their sakes, it would have been good for her to have gone to preschool somewhere else, or to a daycare for a few hours a week. She was the youngest in the family, and very babied. She wanted her mom to do everything for her, even the things we expected the younger toddlers to do by themselves, she had to have help with (at 5 yrs old). The rules meant nothing to her, because she felt the daycare was "hers", so rules shouldn't apply, and she thought the children should do everything she wanted them to because it was "her" place. She also wouldn't listen to me because her mom was there, and she seemed to think she shouldn't have to listen to anyone except mom. When I'd be doing preschool, she'd be disruptive, run off everytime she didn't get his way, or decided she'd rather play than do whatever we were doing. She was not used to any other authority figures because she was always with her mom or dad, and she wasn't used to doing anything for herself because mom could do it for her, etc. When she got to Kindergarten, she had a rough time of adjusting to being out of her own territory, and being away from her mom.

Soo, long story short (sorry I got long winded), I think the owner's daughter would have adjusted better to Kindergarten and life outside daycare if she HAD had some time away from her mom and the daycare.

If the other daycare provider has children, and if you're honest about why you're looking for daycare, she may be interested in trading children a few hours a week. Meaning she'd take your son and you'd take her child. Just a thought....

[learn-n-grow]

Thank you.

I'm not against 3-4 year old PreSchool or 4-5 year old PreK for a few hours a week for same age socialization and education.

At 2 a baby still needs Mommy. I just hate to see work (of any kind) getting in the way of Motherhood.

I have an old fashioned opinion and am just stating it openly.

Taking on other people's children so that you can stay home with your own is great. Shipping your own to someone else so that you can take care of other people's children is just ironic. Sorry, I just don't get it.

(And no, I didn't have perfect angels for children but I didn't take care of more than 2 other children besides my own either.)

How does working get in the way of motherhood? I would not be shipping my child off to take care of someone else's child, perhaps you are replying to the wrong post because in no way did I say I wanted to put him in daycare to take care of another child...

[dave4him]

We had Avery in daycare for three and a half years... she did pretty well there and learned a lot. But i think she picked up a lot more bad habits from the large amount of kids in the daycare... its an interesting contrast between our twins being at home... we will see how it goes. Of course here im trying to get more kids to watch!

[SilverSabre25]

My favorite set of parenting books ("Your X-Year Old" by Lousie Bates-Ames) basically says, in the "Your Three-Year Old" book, that preschool was invented for 3 year olds! They just need a break from home, mommy, routine. If I remember correctly, the two-year-old book even says that nursery school or playschool might be beneficial if the relationship is strained.

Kids are people too and sometimes just want/need to be around someone else for awhile...just like grown-ups. We need a change of pace and a change of scenery; why shouldn't they?

My 3 year (soon-to-be-4-year) old would be in preschool this year if I could have afforded it. Instead, my sister comes over twice a week with her preschooler and we do some homeschool-preschool, and sometimes my DD goes with them to do something fun, like the science museum. Works for us!

[Country Kids]

How does working get in the way of motherhood? I would not be shipping my child off to take care of someone else's child, perhaps you are replying to the wrong post because in no way did I say I wanted to put him in daycare to take care of another child...

I think she means that its ironic that you are looking into putting your own child into childcare when you are taking care of other children. Your own child may look at it as my mommy takes me somewhere else but other children get to stay with her-why can't I?

I know my own children and one in particular always feel the dck's seem to have their mom way more than they do. They are always hearing no don't do that while they are here, no we can't do that while their here, no I can't attend whatever while they are here, etc. Really make sure your child knows that the daycare children are not replacing them, especially if you decided to send them to another childcare or preschool.

Remember also, it doesn't seem like it but before you know it your child will be entering kindergarten. Take this time to nurture, love, and do everything in your power to let them be a child. Once they go to school, unless you have a helper or something, you will be missing out on tons of things they want you to come and do at the school with them.

[Unregistered]

Never!
Perhaps you need to re-evalutate your current situation - maybe you are taking care of too many children?

You say "I just think he needs a break from mommy." Are you sure it's not the other way around? I don't mean to criticize, we all need a break from our children every now and then but to put them in Daycare?

It's time to sort out your priorities.

This was really a very very RUDE and un-called for post! You should be ashamed of your self!!

I have more I would like to say to you, But I am a better person and wont. All I have to say is KARMA!!

[Lucy]

This was really a very very RUDE and un-called for post! You should be ashamed of your self!!

I have more I would like to say to you, But I am a better person and wont. All I have to say is KARMA!!

If you were such a better person, you wouldn't have gone unregistered. Just sayin'

[Unregistered]

If you were such a better person, you wouldn't have gone unregistered. Just sayin'

See this is what I am talking about, people judging people. Joyce you are judging me! I am not registered because I CHOSE TO BE unregistered. Why does it bother you that I am unregistered? I could register and give a silly name like hummm days of our lives or maybe loving granny. So what would it matter?

So if your just sayin, then who ask you to say???

and lets see I will give myself a name...Just Saying!

[Blackcat31]

See this is what I am talking about, people judging people. Joyce you are judging me! I am not registered because I CHOSE TO BE unregistered. Why does it bother you that I am unregistered? I could register and give a silly name like hummm days of our lives or maybe loving granny. So what would it matter?

So if your just sayin, then who ask you to say???

and lets see I will give myself a name...Just Saying!

Just Saying (: I agree.

I think there are many unregistered posters on this forum that have a lot of valuable advice, comments and helpful bits of info Just because I have a cute little cartoon cat next to my made up name doesn't mean my opinion should count any more or less than anyone else......especially if the unregistered poster ("Just Saying" in this case) is stating HER opinion. We ALL have that right. Registered or not.