Toddler Screams At The Door At Drop Off...

[MamaBear]

So I have a 2 yr old boy in my daycare thats been here about 6 months. His first week was rough. He had never been in daycare so when his mom dropped him off in the morning, he would scream & cry at the door. The second week he was fine.

The mom is a school teacher & she chooses to keep him home during the school breaks. So he just had a 2 week fall break and came back on Tuesday. It was like he was starting all over again. I can literally hear him screaming & crying the moment they take him from the car to the door. Its an awful high pitched screaming cry that probably wakes up my whole neighborhood at 7am. It's bad.

I run to the door because as soon as he is inside, and the mom is gone, he completely stops. It's just when she doing her drawn out goodbyes. She is very apologetic and says she doesn't know why hes doing it - but he starts the moment she pulls into the driveway. I told her it could be because she kept him home for 2 weeks and hes starting all over again basically and that the moment she leaves - he stops (as a hint to hurry up and leave! )

The little guy has fun here and seems to really like it here all day. I just wish he wouldn't freak out at drop off. I feel like it makes me look bad to the parents... and my neighbors! haha

Anyone else have a child like this where they are gone for a couple weeks & then act like they are starting all over? Argh. So frustrating.

[cheerfuldom]

After vacations or time gone is the worst. you have to restart that adjustment period. If you can, go get him from the car and make mom leave even faster. otherwise, make the swap at the door super fast for his sake. let the mom know that you are not trying to be rude, only trying to shorten that transition that is already hard on him.

[Unregistered]

I used to have one like that. He was also a teacher's kid who stayed home for breaks and the summer. I found that if I had something that he liked to play with ready for him, he was much better at drop off time. It also helped mom (and me too) to see that he never wanted to LEAVE at pickup time. LOL

[MamaBear]

After vacations or time gone is the worst. you have to restart that adjustment period. If you can, go get him from the car and make mom leave even faster. otherwise, make the swap at the door super fast for his sake. let the mom know that you are not trying to be rude, only trying to shorten that transition that is already hard on him.

Yeah I called her after she left this morning and told her that. That basically the longer shes at the door (and its only like 3 minutes) that the more & louder his crying is. So we'll have to make it FAST drop off to make it easier for him. She agreed. So hopefully a 1 minute drop off will work! ::

[caligirl]

I tell my teacher moms, that even though they are on break, they need to bring their child at least part time during their breaks. Otherwise it IS like starting all over again. What I do is charge half the weekly rate, so they bring their child half the time......the one I have right now comes to me 2 full days and one half day when she is on break

[Meyou]

Oh yeah...I've been there.

When someone is having a hard time at drop off I just tell the parents to hand off, say goodbye and leave ASAP. It's also in my handbook so they know exactly what I'm talking about when it comes to seperation anxiety.

[MamaBear]

I tell my teacher moms, that even though they are on break, they need to bring their child at least part time during their breaks. Otherwise it IS like starting all over again. What I do is charge half the weekly rate, so they bring their child half the time......the one I have right now comes to me 2 full days and one half day when she is on break

Thats a great idea... maybe I need to change that. Right now they have the option to bring them part time during break or keep them home and not pay at all. Your way sounds better because the child will stay "used" to the daycare and I'll still have an income from them as well. Thanks!

[caligirl]

Thats a great idea... maybe I need to change that. Right now they have the option to bring them part time during break or keep them home and not pay at all. Your way sounds better because the child will stay "used" to the daycare and I'll still have an income from them as well. Thanks!

It works out perfect for all of us...... the child stays in a routine, I don't lose out of too much money, and mom gets a little time to herself during the week. It's a win-win for everyone

[wahmof3]

It works out perfect for all of us...... the child stays in a routine, I don't lose out of too much money, and mom gets a little time to herself during the week. It's a win-win for everyone

I have mainly teachers kids & one family does bring their kids once a week during break & I have had no problems w/ adjustment when back in full force. The other family does not bring dck during break and the 1st 3 weeks of back to school were AWFUL!!!

[caligirl]

I have mainly teachers kids & one family does bring their kids once a week during break & I have had no problems w/ adjustment when back in full force. The other family does not bring dck during break and the 1st 3 weeks of back to school were AWFUL!!!

Oh I can only imagine! I do the same when moms are on maternity leave with the next child. I have them pay me half the weeks full time rate and have them bring the child (the one already in my care) half the time. I know how hard it is even after a child has been gone on a weeks vacation....I dread the following week.......they are so out of routine and off my schedule.....same goes when I take a vacation myself, it's almost not worth it!

[MamaBear]

I talked to the mom again just now and she agreed to start bringing him part time during future school breaks to keep him in the routine. Phew. I think that will fix it! Thanks for all the advice

[beachgrl]

I have a three year old dck who comes a couple days more sometimes but no set routine so he tends to whine and stomp a bit at drop off, and then again at pickup...somemof it he does as an attention thing, the rest I thinks due to him being home w dkd on the other days and having difficulty with transitioning. He never dies it fir more than a min and I don't feel too bad bc he doesmthe same thing to his parents when they come to get him.****ns all excited to the door then as soon as they are inside he is pouting and saying no, today he went and hid behind the fridge in housekeeping..it wasnt funny but it kinda was.

[skittles]

I had a teachers son that went to a different daycare this summer and when he came back into my care he behaved so much better than prior to when he left. He had disliked his summer daycare and bugged his mom all summer to come to my childcare. In response to the original post; I would try Nanny D's "Bye Bye at the door" routine for two weeks. I recently did this with one of my 21/2 year old and his family. I had this little guy in care since he was 6 weeks old. Well his family made drop offs and pick ups all about them. Dad would come in and sit on my couch and watch Monster Trucks with my own son (who is 9). After he had told his son 16 plus times that he was leaving. Mom would say goodbye several times and would literally ask her son if it was ok for her to leave. So as you can imagine this little guy would scream and cry until they actually left. He was having such a difficult time. Finally, I had enough. I typed them up alittle letter and told them they were causing their son anxiety which could lead to future problems when he goes to school. They really do love him so I was lucky and they took my advice. I told them they would do all their goodbyes prior to entering daycare and then they would calmly, slowly bring him in, sign the attendence book and leave quietly. I have a huge window in the back so I invited them to "hide" to watch how he transitions into daycare. After two days of this he instantly stopped tantruming. Pick ups are still alittle difficult but his family is trying at least. It has been two months now and he is still tantrum free in the morning.

[MamaBear]

I had a teachers son that went to a different daycare this summer and when he came back into my care he behaved so much better than prior to when he left. He had disliked his summer daycare and bugged his mom all summer to come to my childcare. In response to the original post; I would try Nanny D's "Bye Bye at the door" routine for two weeks. I recently did this with one of my 21/2 year old and his family. I had this little guy in care since he was 6 weeks old. Well his family made drop offs and pick ups all about them. Dad would come in and sit on my couch and watch Monster Trucks with my own son (who is 9). After he had told his son 16 plus times that he was leaving. Mom would say goodbye several times and would literally ask her son if it was ok for her to leave. So as you can imagine this little guy would scream and cry until they actually left. He was having such a difficult time. Finally, I had enough. I typed them up alittle letter and told them they were causing their son anxiety which could lead to future problems when he goes to school. They really do love him so I was lucky and they took my advice. I told them they would do all their goodbyes prior to entering daycare and then they would calmly, slowly bring him in, sign the attendence book and leave quietly. I have a huge window in the back so I invited them to "hide" to watch how he transitions into daycare. After two days of this he instantly stopped tantruming. Pick ups are still alittle difficult but his family is trying at least. It has been two months now and he is still tantrum free in the morning.

Yes - I already do this. The parent doesn't come in... It's just a quick "good morning - goodbye" and shes gone. The problem is just him crying from the car to the door and once I have him inside & the door is shut he instantly stops. Theres really no way to make it any quicker unless she just leaves him in the driveway! haha :: I think it will get better next week. And him coming during breaks will help a lot too.

[dave4him]

Hate to have my babies scream.... which might be why they are so spoiled