Having Issues With My Assistant

[godiva83]

I am fortunate enough that my HDC has been such a great success that I was able to hire a P/T assistant. She is a lovely girl in her 20's very friendly and social, but she just doesn't seem to get it- doesn't come on time, isn't organized and I feel she doesn't take this job seriously because it is out of my home. I have explained to her many times that this is my profession and it needs to be taken seriously, printed of her daily tasks, set rules and guidelines and I pay her very well.
I am not to sure what I should do at this point, a written warning, less hours, or let her go.
Also, she feels like she can do whatever it is that I do, meaning if I am on the phone she feels obliged to be on the phone also... When I am using the phone it is usually quiet time and I am doing business, ordering supplies ect. Plus I have an assistant to give myself a break from time to time.
Anyway, any advice as usual is always appreciated and even how I could word a written warning. I have had to give warnings and let go employees in a large centre but never one that I worked one to one with

[cheerfuldom]

It is so much harder when it is an assistant in your own home. I think you should read thru nannyde's blog posts on assistants and then give one final, clear warning. Review what you need to see changed. Good assistants are hard to find and you really do have to train them from day one. Its going to be very hard to retrain her since bad habits are formed and you may have to let her go. I am on my fourth assistant.

The first was a mom that brought her own kid (BAD idea, I didn't know that then)
Second quit after one shift. She thought this was going to be an easy job.
Third I fired because she got lazy like you are describing and was bringing her personal drama into work. Starting crying in front of one of the parents, missed a day because she got into a fight with her boyfriend, etc.

Fourth is the best one! But i am a better boss for having had the previous experiences.

[nannyde]

Have you read my five part staff assistant blog Godiva?

https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/the-day-care-home-staff-assistant.htm

One thing I tell them on the very first interview is that we are NOT partners. I don't have you here so I can work along side of you. If I'm going to be in the room with you I don't need you. I never keep more kids than one person can handle at a time within my system and set up.

I have you here to do everything I don't want to do during that time. I'm here to step in when two people are needed to do what is happening at the moment but those moments need to get fewer and farther between as I train you.

You have to find the right person who can tolerate the sameness of this every day and come into it with an understanding that it is hard work. If they want to sit and watch kids play toys and play with the kids they are going to fail here. If it's easy I'm going to give you more to do. I don't pay for easy.

[permanentvacation]

It is a little harder to reprimand an employee when it is only you and the one employee. Neither of you have anywhere to go to get away from each other and get your mind off of the fact that you just had to "talk with her". In a company with multiple employees, after "the talk", you can go back in your office, she can go to her work station, and you guys can ignore each other for a little while so you can calm down and mull over your talk. However, at a home daycare, you don't have anywhere to hide from each other. I have had 3 employees throughout the years. I moved a couple of times - so I had to hire a new person in the new area. I never had a problem with either of my first 2 employees. But the one I have now, I have had to talk to a few times. Nothing major, just little things, but things that do bother me enough to discuss them with her. I have learned to have a discussion with her during the last 1/2 hour or so of her work day. That way, after 'the talk', she can leave and go home, while I stay here. That gives us both the evening to be away from each other so we can mull it over in our own ways away from each other for the night. I have noticed that if I fuss with her over somthing that REALLY UPSET me, she calls out the next day! I guess she needs more time to get over being reprimanded! I don't really need her to be here every day, so I don't fuss about her calling out the next day. Actually, I usually feel like it's nice not to have to work with her the next day!

However, you do need to rememeber yourself, and make sure your employee is well aware that you are running a business and the employee has certain responsibilities/tasks that are required of her, her behavior must be professional, etc. Even though your business is in your home, it IS a business and you expect your employee to treat it as such. She has been hired to do a job at a business. And, as her employer, you need to let her know what is expected of her and make sure she does her job.

It's not her business what you are doing with your time. You are the OWNER of the business! And like you said, you have her there partly so you can have a break to do whatever personal activities you want to do. Sometimes, I make personal calls, go run personal errands, take a nap, other times I prepare daycare preschool activities, whatever I want to do with my time! But my employee knows that I have hired her for a certain timeframe so I can have some personal time if I want to.

[CountryMommy]

It is so much harder when it is an assistant in your own home. I think you should read thru nannyde's blog posts on assistants and then give one final, clear warning. Review what you need to see changed. Good assistants are hard to find and you really do have to train them from day one. Its going to be very hard to retrain her since bad habits are formed and you may have to let her go. I am on my fourth assistant.

The first was a mom that brought her own kid (BAD idea, I didn't know that then)
Second quit after one shift. She thought this was going to be an easy job.Third I fired because she got lazy like you are describing and was bringing her personal drama into work. Starting crying in front of one of the parents, missed a day because she got into a fight with her boyfriend, etc.

Fourth is the best one! But i am a better boss for having had the previous experiences.

::::

[cheerfuldom]

I know right and this was a person that had previously worked in a preschool. I promise, my kids are not hard and I think there was five, maybe six kids that day, not a full day for me. I am guessing maybe she had an assistant or two in the previous place she worked and was not prepared to do all of it herself.

[godiva83]

Thanks for the replies... I am planning on speaking with her later this afternoon- 30 or so minutes before close, she will also be given a written warning- I simply have to bite the bullet as she really needs to smarten up.
My DH says it is because she is young and just learning- but to me that is an excuse. I on the other hand had such a hard time hiring that I don't want to lose her either as the extra hands are needed at times.

However, I came to the daycare space to find her lounging on the sofa painting her nails how Would she interveine if needed with wet nails??
The sad thing is I have gone over this with her, she has a lunch and break for a reason!

[nannyde]

However, I came to the daycare space to find her lounging on the sofa painting her nails how Would she interveine if needed with wet nails??

Ah yeah

That would be a declaration of war at my house.

Not kidding

She doesn't get it.

Get video cameras put up and get to the business of micro correcting her. On her like white on rice... minute to minute. NO free or idle time. Work every minute you are on the clock. If she has the kind of time to paint nail she has time to do more work for you. Ply her with work... every second. She'll either get busy or head out the door.

She senses that she has the upperhand over you. Tell her clearly that she does not. Tell her you can care for these kids by yourself with your eyes closed and your hands tied behind your back. She's extra ... not essential.

Does she want to work and make money or not? Being a kid doesn't have anything to do with it. I have had fourteen y/o staff assistants that rocked from day one.

She lazy and most likely you aren't making things perfectly clear on what you want. If she can't come up with consistent work you have to intervene.

Take the time to read my series. If it doesn't help with this one it will surely empower you for the next one.

[Mom_of_two]

WOW on the nails! Crazy! I would say written warning then let her go! There are plenty of responsible young people out there. "She's just young' is not an excuse. I have been early to work/appointments/etc my whole life because that is what I was taught. It isn't age, it is respect (or lack of) for self and others. Keep us posted!

[Kaddidle Care]

I would have let her go already.

Fire her and hire me. :: Where do you live again? (JK)

She's in Babysitter mode. You know - put the kids to bed, eat all the snacks, do your nails and watch TV? This isn't Daycare!

[Sprouts]

Have you read my five part staff assistant blog Godiva?

https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/the-day-care-home-staff-assistant.htm

One thing I tell them on the very first interview is that we are NOT partners. I don't have you here so I can work along side of you. If I'm going to be in the room with you I don't need you. I never keep more kids than one person can handle at a time within my system and set up.

I have you here to do everything I don't want to do during that time. I'm here to step in when two people are needed to do what is happening at the moment but those moments need to get fewer and farther between as I train you.

You have to find the right person who can tolerate the sameness of this every day and come into it with an understanding that it is hard work. If they want to sit and watch kids play toys and play with the kids they are going to fail here. If it's easy I'm going to give you more to do. I don't pay for easy.

How can I put this is nicer words for my current assistants with out sounding like I am trying to get over. I know what you say is very straight to the point and I could use with hiring new employess but with my current employees I am noticing some slacking off and need some wording for them that won't offend them and can maybe get them more motivated???? Hope this is not too much or too late

[Christian Mother]

I think you need to look for another assistant and maybe not one as young. Myabe I'm being predigest, but she sounds quiet young for those type of responsibilities. I was raised in a daycare while my mother ran one and then in high school I started babysitting, then got hired working as a TA for a Christian School worked there 5 yrs which I had extensive experiences working with 2's class and Kiddy. I also Nannied for 4 yrs (3 kids). Also was attending college for Early Childhood Educ. My life cried CHILDREN...That is what you need to be looking for when your hiring an assistant...

Start the search for another assistant....be thoughtful in with find out first what their back ground is and how long they've worked with children. Is this the field they plan to be staying in. What potential career are they looking to get into and is it kid oriented? Get tons of ref. and call each one asking questions about what areas that person cld improve on. Which ones she/he excelled on. Any accidents and how did that person handle them...Put them in situations to see how'd they them. Also, maybe a trial period of 2 wks and if it works out great if not. Sorry, just not working out. Best of luck to you!!

[Sprouts]

What are your requirements for lunch and breakfast? Do you have them bring their own lunch, or feed them as well? One of my assistants comes in at lunch time, hungry, its my sister in law so she is used to eating here, but the fact she has to eat will take away from her helping. I told her today if she is going to come and eat for lunch to come 15 minutes before her start time so she can eat and then Start work at her normal time....she has been coming in late one to many times....what would you do in this situation?

YESTERDAYS SCENARIO: She was supposed to come in at 12:30, came at 12:47, recorded her start time at 12:45 and then ate quickly for 5 minutes....how would you handle this?

[Preschool/daycare teacher]

I think you need to look for another assistant and maybe not one as young. Myabe I'm being predigest, but she sounds quiet young for those type of responsibilities. I was raised in a daycare while my mother ran one and then in high school I started babysitting, then got hired working as a TA for a Christian School worked there 5 yrs which I had extensive experiences working with 2's class and Kiddy. I also Nannied for 4 yrs (3 kids). Also was attending college for Early Childhood Educ. My life cried CHILDREN...That is what you need to be looking for when your hiring an assistant...

Start the search for another assistant....be thoughtful in with find out first what their back ground is and how long they've worked with children. Is this the field they plan to be staying in. What potential career are they looking to get into and is it kid oriented? Get tons of ref. and call each one asking questions about what areas that person cld improve on. Which ones she/he excelled on. Any accidents and how did that person handle them...Put them in situations to see how'd they them. Also, maybe a trial period of 2 wks and if it works out great if not. Sorry, just not working out. Best of luck to you!!

I agree with this. Find someone who has experience with children and want to stay in that line of work. On the side, I disagree about the age. I'm in my 20's, and I think I'm fully capable of handling the responsibilities. I do it every day with the owner, and all the time when the owner takes the day off, and in the afternoons on my days to close (we take turns-usually every other day). The preschool/daycare is in a seperate building from where either of us live, so when we leave, we're done for the day. In my opinion, common sense is the main thing with hiring someone, rather than age. Common sense tells me that Mondays are busy days, so matter how much I want to extend the weekend, or not teach preschool that day, it's not an option to take off. Up too late the night before? Too bad. There's children to take care of. Even on the slow days when we really don't need two people, I have a JOB, and I'm supposed to be there. And on time, ready to go at it. A parent was late picking their child up, and the child was being difficult, meaning I couldn't get everything done and cleaned up before they left. Well, there's children first thing in the morning. Why should sweeping the floor be put off for the next morning, when all the children are here? That's enough for me. The owner has not had to "train" me on this. It's plain common sense. I've learned a lot from her, I know, but she does it in such a way that I don't realize it I'm afraid if someone acted as if I was dumb and had to be trained in everything, and wasn't needed, was just "an extra" I wouldn't last long. If I didn't feel needed, I'm afraid I wouldn't be very happy there, and would want to find somewhere I WAS needed. Telling someone they're just an extra would, for me, UN motivate me to do anything. If a person isn't needed why would they be on time and why would I do anything with the children if I'm "not needed" for itanyway? If you told me you can do it so much better than me ("hands tied behind my back"), it would really discourage me, and I'd feel like quitting. I'm afraid if the owner told me, "I don't need you, you're just an extra", it would hurt really bad. Those words right there would probably hurt worse than most anything else she could say to me. She could reprimand me all day, but those words would be the worst. She did say something along those lines one time when we were really low on enrollment (it wasn't that I wasn't doing anything. It was just something that one person could do), and it was summer (so I wasn't needed for doing the preschool part). And I tell you, I really wanted to quit that day. But I didn't say anything to her, I just finished the day out and then went home. And prayed for more children to enroll asap!
I'm not mad at anyone on here, by the way. Just wanted to share an assistant's view point, and an "in the 20's" view.
For the original poster, it sounds like your assistant has too much time on her hands. Can you trust her enough to start leaving her alone with them so she HAS to do something, while you go out for lunch for something? Make it so that she IS needed. More cleaning, more diaper changes, more reading to the children, more leading of group activities... If you really don't need her that much, try to take a back seat to everything, and let her take over as much as possible (with your supervision, if she can't be trusted yet). But don't let her know what you're doing. Just kind of gradually move into it. As for being on time, I don't have any suggestions. Is there an attitude thing going on, like she thinks she doesn't have to do what you say, or was it a gradual thing, where she started thinking of the job as really laid back and flexible, and eventually so laid back that a "few minutes late" wont hurt? If it's an attitude thing, a warning would be the only thing I can think of, and then fireing her if that didn't work. Or hiring someone else and cutting her hours way back so that she eventually quit on her own. Make sure you're saying something everytime she's late. "I was about to call you to see where you were. It's 8:15." and if that "niceness" doesn't work, be blunt and firm, "you're late. You were scheduled for 8:00 today". And finally, "I'm going to have to hire someone who can be here when I need them. I'll keep you in mind when I need a substitute. Maybe working "as needed" would work better for you." And then just don't call her up again, unless you really are in a pinch and need to call her in as a last resort.

[Sprouts]

She is my sister in law, and sorry Godiva I realize i should just make a seperate thread !!

I am looking into hiring an extra assistant and see what happens from there, that might put some fire under her bottom