Uhhh...Am I Wrong To Refuse Services?! (VENT)

[MsMe]

I don't police what the parents do while their children are in my care...

That said it does drive me crazy when parents do this on a regular basis.

I have said it many times before... I know I should be able to over look it and not care, but I can't. I compare it to a vegatarian working in a butcher shop. It is so against everything I think is 'right' that I have chosen to leave daycare because of it.

[Live and Learn]

You are fighting a losing battle.

[Angelwings36]

If her child was the only child that was suppose to come tomorrow and she informed me she had the day off I would close personally. If I had other children coming then I would still take her child.

[Kaddidle Care]

I had a DCM come this afternoon to tell me she was taking tomorrow off! SUPER! Now here it comes:

"I'm going quilting tomorrow so I will drop baby off at 9am rather than 730am and I will pick up at regular time."

Really?! She gets a day off but I don't?! I'm really getting fed up with parents that get to enjoy their day but I don't.

It's really getting to the point I'm going to take a Monday off because I CAN and I WANT TO BE SELFISH TOO! ::::::

How many of you would work and how many of you would tell her NO!

I would work - I think sometimes it's better if they don't tell us what they plan to do on their day off and we just go along thinking they are at work.

[AfterSchoolMom]

If her child was the only child that was suppose to come tomorrow and she informed me she had the day off I would close personally. If I had other children coming then I would still take her child.

This. If you don't have any other kids coming and want the day off, tell her so, but I'd be prepared to take a day off unpaid or expect her to give you grief over paying.

[e.j.]

How many of you would work and how many of you would tell her NO!

I would work. I run a child care business. It doesn't matter to me what the parents are doing with their time. As long as they pay me and pick up on time, I don't think it's any of my business what they're doing while their child is with me.

[wdmmom]

I would work. I run a child care business. It doesn't matter to me what the parents are doing with their time. As long as they pay me and pick up on time, I don't think it's any of my business what they're doing while their child is with me.

That's where we differ. I feel because I have the child in my care, I have the right to know where the parent is. It's better she told me she won't be at work versus something happening and me calling her at work and not reaching her...kwim?!

[jojosmommy]

I'd work.

I honestly could care less what my dcps do during their days - that's their business. As long as I can reach them in an emergency, and I get paid for the day - I'm happy.

I agree. Otherwise next time mom won't tell you her plans and will just drop off at 7:30 like usual. I would be glad to get an hour and a half w/o this kid and still get paid as usual.

I disagree with it personally BUT I have DCP do it and I do not care from a business point of view.

[Country Kids]

I have had a parent drop children off and then go to work, or so I thought. We later had to call for a sick child and no mom at work. Didn't have a cell phone or wasn't answering so I finally was able to get ahold of dad. I was not a happy camper!!!!

What I have always noticed is, the parents that take a day off and keep the child in childcare is the one that the provider needs the most break from. I have had a few over the years that when they aren't here I'm happier and all my kids are more happier. I think the parents feel the same way so instead of keeping the child they drop them off as usual and get a whole free day.

[Pammie]

What I have always noticed is, the parents that take a day off and keep the child in childcare is the one that the provider needs the most break from. I have had a few over the years that when they aren't here I'm happier and all my kids are more happier. I think the parents feel the same way so instead of keeping the child they drop them off as usual and get a whole free day.

So true,
Over the summer, I found myself trying to tactfully answer a question posed to me by one of my s/a kids - as to why two sibling dcks were here for daycare every day of the summer, when both of their parents are teachers and had the entire summer off. Before I could come up with a nice response, my s/a said, "oh, if they were my kids I wouldn't want to spend time with them either."
Funny and sad all at the same time.

[Cat Herder]

I tried that for many many years.... unsuccessfully I might add.

I finally gave up.

You will either get confrontation or deceit. You got confrontation.

Same here. More Rules = More Policing = More Stress = Faster Burnout = Less "Fun" Me for My Family and My DCK's

It occurred to me that I can't dictate ethics, morals, priorities or parental life choices.

What is important to me is not necessarily important to someone else and I needed to respect that.

IMHO, I have my operational hours and am obligated to work those hours. Now, let the clock strike 6 and the parent isn't here I get VERY cranky. I liken it to feeding a Mogwai after midnight...::

[DCMom]

I would work.

I charge by the spot and I am being paid for it. Built into that per spot charge are paid holidays and days off, so as long as they don't give me grief for the days I take off, I don't care what they do with theirs. I stopped fighting that battle a long time ago.

[wdmmom]

Now she's telling me pick up might be a bit later since she is going to be over a half hour away.

I told her, "NOPE!" You have until 2:40pm or late charges will incur!

[countrymom]

I understand where your coming from. I had a mom who would dump her kid off here all the time, to go shopping, to put up the christmas tree, to get a hair cut (why she didn't do this on the weekend made no sense) the problem started occuring when I needed days off (I don't many off) or needed the kid to be picked up early then holy stink the parents would be made. I don't care if they pay me, the point is why should I have to deal with your child everyday while you get to do whatever you want but when I need it off I get "I'm going to get fired from my job"

[Crazy8]

yes, I do think you are wrong to refuse services. If the child is contracted to come on Fridays you should take them regardless of where mom is going. She informed you of where she'd be, how to reach her and she's giving you a few hours off. I don't think you have the right to ask for anything else.

Now if your policy states they are not allowed to bring their child if they are not going to work you can call them on that - but be prepared for them to either start lying about it or find another daycare. I'd rather them be honest with me so I know how/where I can reach them.

Only time I ever had an issue was with a parent who took days off work all summer for "fun" things while her kids were still here but then "couldn't" take the time off when they were sick in the Fall because she was out of days - they didn't last long - that was just one indicator that she was a very irresponsible parent.

I know people (not my dc families) who work all week while kids are in daycare and then ship the kids to the grandparents for the weekend or hire babysitters every Sat night because they "need a break from their kids". There's a big difference between that and needing a "mental health" day once in a while. A little time alone makes all of us better parents - let this mom enjoy her time and take it as a compliment that she knows her child is safe with you!