Tweet
OK, I have noticed many threads lately, including my own about having problems with children and parents. Is it because of weather changing, school starting up again, less playtime outside, etc? I know this week has just not been the best for me and I am trying different things but this has been the first year I have really, really, not been into doing childcare. Alot of it has to do with behavior of the kids. Love all the parents and kids but not the uncontrollable behavior I am seeing. I am getting the feeling like they know all they will get is "quiet time" and its not big deal so why not go back to the behavior when they get out. It is really starting to wear me at!
-
Each day is a fresh start
Never look back on regrets
Live life to the fullest
We only get one shot at this!!
-
I think what the children are experiencing at home, like a bad economy, shows up in their behavior. Sometimes when things are tough at home it is also stressful for the children. Not that they comprehend what is going on but the energy between parents that are struggling has to make an impression. Just my two cents.
-
Very true! It just seems like there are alot of posts about alot of children this week struggling with behavior, not eating, sleeping, playing. This week there just seems to be a boom of these type of posts, more than usual.Each day is a fresh start
Never look back on regrets
Live life to the fullest
We only get one shot at this!!
Comment
-
My dh and I believe that parents are just raising their children differently now-a-days. There have always been "spoiled" children, but we have noticed a trend in both the way our grandchildren and many of the dc kids are being raised.
Seems like no one wants to hurt a child's feelings anymore, ever. They don't want their child to cry, ever. Thing's like "no cry parenting", seem to mean "no boundry parenting". That may not be the intention of the technique, I am not exactly knowledgable on the subject.
We watch our daughter negotiate everything with her 4 yo son, and I watch one of my dc mom's chase her daughter around the yard, and mom is laughing! Oh...isn't that cute...NOT! Get your butt in the car, kiddo!
I am not suggesting we should disregard our children's feelings or treat them like they don't count. But, I think children need boundries, and that it is our job as parents to enforce those boundries.
I explain things to my kids when I CHOOSE to explain them, otherwise, the answer is "because I am your mother, and I said so" that should be good enough.
It's the brick wall vs. jelly fish....my feeling is that parents need to be somewhere in between.
That's my 2 cent's worth...Comment
-
We refer to it as "Affair Season" around here (late summer/early fall).
Seems to happen this time every year with at least one family (over many years)....
Not to mention in the domestic violence section of the police blotter.
Less interest in what is going on with their child, less respect for my time/policies, less consistency at home etc. generally result because of that.
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.Comment
-
I think I've been experiencing the change of weather - physically these headaches are wicked and it's really wearing me out emotionally. I had to take a few minutes today to lock myself in the bathroom or else I was going to start yelling...
I am so looking forward to have another adult to bounce off...
Comment
-
The fall/ winter months certainly brings out some gloomy, melancholic feeling in each of us sometimes... And it transcends to our kids unfortunately - they can feel the weight of their parents feelings... And add to that the kind of parenting of trying to "give" and "understand" our kids sometimes... Kids can get stressed out too.
Just my thought...Comment
-
This is so true! And the kids pick up on it so fast! The crying kid at drop off.....and mom frets....and kid knows mom is fretting...and the more attention drawn to it....the worse it gets. And what does kid say 2 seconds after the door closes? What are we having for breakfast?
I have a "stern voice" when I need it. Some of my kids never hear that stern voice from their parents. Instead they hear a whiney voice....Little Johnny, Cooooome on....we neeeeeeeed to gooooooo!
Or the parent who threatens. I actually had a dad start to pull of his belt to whip his kid. I told him he may not do that here. Then he winks at me. Just another empty threatComment
-
I think parents are afraid of their kids....afraid of upsetting them. Afraid they will feel sad, disappointed, angry....all will do whatever it takes to have their children avoid having to deal with such emotions. Thing is, how will they handle disappointment, anger and sadness at appropriate times? Are we not emotionally bubble wrapping kids and thus hindering their emotional development?Comment
-
Kind of reminds me of Dudley getting his Birthday Presents:
"36? But last year there were 37!!!"
The Mother's reaction is exactly as described above.Comment
-
Alot of it has to do with parents measuring themselves by the behavior of their children. When their child is behaving poorly, they somehow think it means they are bad parents.
I have a sign posted by my parent board that says, "The behavior of your child is NOT a reflection on your parenting. How you handle that behavior is."Comment
-
Yep...3 yo had to open all her bday presents on the day before her birthday because 2 days of presents would be "too hard" on the 4 yo!Comment
-
I had a parent one time count all the pictures I had of all the kids I posted on FB.....then compared and told me there were less of her son. He was PART TIME! She also said he was not smiling in the pictures. I told her to look again.....he was engaged....most kids when interested and engaged do not have a big goofy smile on their face. I am not kidding.....she had written a HUGE email about all of her concerns. She also walked in and "caught" me teaching her child how to tie his shoes......she said....it is not conducive for a 4 year old to tie his shoes. OK......so she sent him to K the next year.....he was suspended for not following the rules......and she complained that he did not know how to tie his shoes.Comment
: Yes, yes, what she said!
Comment