Special Time With Hubby

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  • Country Kids
    Nature Lover
    • Mar 2011
    • 5051

    Special Time With Hubby

    So with all the posts lately about missing family time, no face time with the kiddos, missing events, etc. I noticed not one person saying anything about missing time with their husbands! Do they really take that much of a backseat to our childcares and children?

    I noticed quite a few people saying they go to bed at like 8 because of having to get up so early. When you go to bed that early and the children and hubby is still up when do you have special time to your husband. I'm very serious on this because since I've gone back to full time work all I want to do is get through the night and go to bed to sleep. I really don't even watch tv or read anymore because I'm so tired at night, so anytime with the husband is not really there anymore.

    We actually went out on a "date night"-dinner and grocery shopping but I didn't really enjoy it because all I could think about was getting home to get my weekend cleaning done.

    How does everyone fit their husband into their busy, busy schedules?
    Each day is a fresh start
    Never look back on regrets
    Live life to the fullest
    We only get one shot at this!!
  • daycare
    Advanced Daycare.com *********
    • Feb 2011
    • 16259

    #2
    My husband and I go days and sometimes maybe even a week without seeing each other. It is hard. BUT you have to plan special days and let the little things go.

    We joined a wine club together at a local vineyard. We will go once a month and make a date of it. Plan a picnic lunch and sip wine out in the vineyards. Of course in the winter months we find other things to do. But we make time for us. I think that it is just as, if not more important than my entire family getting to be together. Him and I are the foundation of this family and marriage and we need keep our bond strong. What's the point of family day, if we can't all enjoy it. My husband and I will plan at least two fun things to do a month. Even if it is just eating dinner late night in front of the TV...
    it's sad, but just like every thing else, it has to be planned and penciled in.........

    Comment

    • Zoe
      Advanced Daycare.com Member
      • Dec 2010
      • 1445

      #3
      I might be in the minority here but my husband and I communicate about EVERYTHING! We talk about what we're feeling, whether it's frustration with each other, admiration of a nice-looking celebrity , laughing about the kids, etc. And when my son was born almost 4 years ago, DH mentioned that he is a little jealous of my time with the kids. So we made sure to make time for each other every night.

      I have to stay up late because of my second shift kid, but my hubby has to get up very early. So we set a "bed time" for him. The kids go down between 8 and 9. Then it's grown-up time until 10:30. We usually watch a tv show or a movie together. Every night. Usually he'll nod off before 10:30 but we're together on the couch and even that closeness (even if he is unconscious ) helps our relationship.

      Okay, I sound a little "mushy", sorry. But I've seen pretty much EVERY ONE of my friends' marriages end up in divorce and there's no way in h-e-double hockey sticks I'm letting that happen with my marriage. I love the guy too much.

      Comment

      • laundrymom
        Advanced Daycare.com Member
        • Nov 2010
        • 4177

        #4
        We celebrated our 14th anniversary this week. We make time for each other. We have 4 kids, 10 extra daykids, and he requires alot of sleep. I tuck him in each night, we talk then, I set my alarm for early sometimes,.. We sneak out to the camper, =-) , We seem to just fit it in. You are right in making it a prioroty. It must be.

        Comment

        • Sugar Magnolia
          Blossoms Blooming
          • Apr 2011
          • 2647

          #5
          Smarty pants reply! Lol!

          My husband is my partner in our small daycare center. Actually I sometimes need my "special time" AWAY from him!! LOL! Yeah it can be tough spending 24/7 together! We don't live in the house our center is in, and that's a REALLY good thing. But we do get totally sick of each other sometimes and its not unusual to have some kind of debate about the days events in the car on the way home! LOL!
          But seriously, we DO need OUR special time occasionally. We are fortunate to have local grandparents to watch our own kids every now and then, so we treasure that time.
          But the rest of the time its kidskidskidskidskids!!! We often joke with people w have 18 kids! 15 clients, 2 of our own and a puppy. We get some funny looks before we explain that though! LOL!!!

          Comment

          • daycare
            Advanced Daycare.com *********
            • Feb 2011
            • 16259

            #6
            Originally posted by Sugar Magnolia
            My husband is my partner in our small daycare center. Actually I sometimes need my "special time" AWAY from him!! LOL! Yeah it can be tough spending 24/7 together! We don't live in the house our center is in, and that's a REALLY good thing. But we do get totally sick of each other sometimes and its not unusual to have some kind of debate about the days events in the car on the way home! LOL!
            But seriously, we DO need OUR special time occasionally. We are fortunate to have local grandparents to watch our own kids every now and then, so we treasure that time.
            But the rest of the time its kidskidskidskidskids!!! We often joke with people w have 18 kids! 15 clients, 2 of our own and a puppy. We get some funny looks before we explain that though! LOL!!!
            I once told someone that I have 8 kids and they all have different last names....

            Comment

            • melskids
              Daycare.com Member
              • Feb 2010
              • 1776

              #7
              Originally posted by laundrymom
              We celebrated our 14th anniversary this week. We make time for each other. We have 4 kids, 10 extra daykids, and he requires alot of sleep. I tuck him in each night, we talk then, I set my alarm for early sometimes,.. We sneak out to the camper, =-) , We seem to just fit it in. You are right in making it a prioroty. It must be.
              love it! :: us too. after daycare hours, of course.

              Comment

              • laundrymom
                Advanced Daycare.com Member
                • Nov 2010
                • 4177

                #8
                Originally posted by melskids
                love it! :: us too. after daycare hours, of course.
                Of course. Lol of course I " think " the 13 yr old has caught on. She always rolls her eyes and has been saying ohhh grosssss

                Comment

                • MamaJ
                  Daycare.com Member
                  • Jun 2011
                  • 71

                  #9
                  thanks for bringing this up...something I need to work on (or me and my hubby). we are both so busy, and it's easy to grow apart. you're right...a lot of my focus when kids are gone is cleaning and getting ready for the next day....and when I go to bed, it's because i want to go. to. bed. zzzzzzz.

                  we did go out to dinner the othernight, and do have an overnight stay at a local hotel with a dinner/comedy club night out planned a few weeks from now.

                  but yes....I feel most time I'm so focused on making sure my own kids feel loved and not getting the shaft b/c of the daycare that my husband often does come last....

                  Comment

                  • Sugar Magnolia
                    Blossoms Blooming
                    • Apr 2011
                    • 2647

                    #10
                    Originally posted by daycare
                    I once told someone that I have 8 kids and they all have different last names....
                    Good one daycare!!! I'm gonna use that line for sure! Good post country kids!
                    LOL laundrymom!!! The camper....heehhee

                    Comment

                    • beachgrl
                      Daycare.com Member
                      • Aug 2011
                      • 552

                      #11
                      Well it can be hard because I have started this daycare and take two graduate courses online and he works third shift 5 nights out of the week, plus has classes midday-night two days a week in town so we see each other in passing or the nights when he isnt in school. He has to try to sleep in there somewhere and often times I am crashed out on the couch while he is up watching tv before leaving for work and he wakes me up to go to bed...

                      We try to do dinner together usually cooking at home but still and watch our fav shows even if we have to dvr them to do it and a movie some nights, we talk and we try to do things we both enjoy on the weekends when we have a chance, both by ourselves and with the kids. We are just looking at this as a temporary but necessary step in our lives until he finishes school in the spring and can do something different jobwise.

                      Comment

                      • mom2many
                        Daycare.com Member
                        • Jun 2011
                        • 1278

                        #12
                        My husband retired from his f/t construction job and still does some side work, but he is always here to help me at drop off and pick up each day for the S/A kids I watch and we spend a lot of time together each day.

                        We have also recently become "empty nesters" since our youngest moved out, so we have been enjoying the evenings now with just the two of us!

                        Comment

                        • boysx5
                          Daycare.com Member
                          • Mar 2010
                          • 681

                          #13
                          we do date nite twice a month and plan days to see each other he works a crazy schedule so between the both of us working long hours and having five kids its hard there is no other way but to plan time

                          Comment

                          • Blackcat31
                            • Oct 2010
                            • 36124

                            #14
                            My DH and I have been together for almost 25 years. He was my high school sweetheart. He is self employed so he works at home. He comes into my daycare house everyday for lunch and helps out with feeding all the kids and getting them down for nap. We then eat lunch together before he heads back home. When I do get done for the day at 5:30 and head home, he has dinner prepared and on the table for me. He loves cooking (I view it only as utilitarian) so he officially took over years ago.

                            Our youngest is currently half out the door right now so we are soon to be empty nesters. Not sure how I feel about this yet.

                            My DH is my best friend so making time for each other is easy since we pretty much do EVERYTHING together. I am closing at 3 tomorrow and we are actually taking a trip up the north shore of Lake Superior towards Canada for the weekend.....just because. We take little weekend trips pretty regularly. We don't spend much (just the hotel costs and a nice dinner). The rest of the time we sight see and drive around while talking.

                            He goes to bed really early and I stay up late to watch trashy reality TV that I DVR...LOL!! That is about the only differences we have in our schedules.

                            It is always important to make time for each other because once the kiddos are all grown and gone, you only have each other.

                            Comment

                            • littlemissmuffet
                              Advanced Daycare.com Member
                              • Jan 2011
                              • 2194

                              #15
                              My husband helps me with everything in the house - laundry, dishes, making beds, etc so that the chores take half the time and energy! We also almost always do the grocery shopping together. On his days off (during the week) he helps with the daycare kiddos, we go for walks with the kids, or take them on feild trips. We usually bathe/shower together We actually do almost everything together because to us, every moment together counts as quality time to us.

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