When Things Get Tough How Do You Keep Going?

[daycare]

I have a dcf that has two boys full time in my care. (i have posted about them here before). The boys are here for 11+ hours a day and eat every meal here with me.

Over the past few weeks, I have been struggeling with the parents. I am feeling very taken advatange of, disrespected, and just horrible.

I don't really have too many issues with the kids that I can't get over, but the parents are just pushing me to my limits. I have no option to term, as todays economy has put me in this bind.

I have been doing this job for almost 10 years and have NEVER felt like this before and I feel like just giving up. Trust me, if this family was here last year, I would have dropped them. But with business being so slow, I can't.

Daycare is a hard job and parents and kids come as a package deal. can't have one without the other.

How do you make it through times like this? How do I fix this problem and how do I move on....

[Cat Herder]

The problem to focus on, IMHO, is not the DCP's. You already know how to solve that one.

Your focus should be on how to solve the problem that is forcing you to allow them to treat you this way.

Look around you... Is there anything you can do without, services you don't need or things you can get for less by improvising a bit?

Sometimes simplifying our lives IS the only answer to our happiness.

I found over $100 a month just by not stopping for a coffee on the way home from taking the kids to school.

[daycare]

The problem to focus on, IMHO, is not the DCP's. You already know how to solve that one.

Your focus should be on how to solve the problem that is forcing you to allow them to treat you this way.

Look around you... Is there anything you can do without, services you don't need or things you can get for less by improvising a bit?

Sometimes simplifying our lives IS the only answer to our happiness.

I found over $100 a month just by not stopping for a coffee on the way home from taking the kids to school.

You are so right cat..

I think the issue is that I am forced to keep this family becuase of the income. I have been forced to bend my hours, rules and polices to keep this family, when normally I would never do that.

I have already changed several things in my life to make it "EASIER" so I guess you could say, but I am still feeling horrible.

This is family is the "new age" we want to parent as less as possible.....

I think maybe you should just take your shoe off and wack me over the head with it....


When I did make changes in my house hould and spending due to the state of my business, it felt like everyone in my house was getting less and I am having to do sooooo much more...........

[Cat Herder]

I understand that feeling... I have had to really look at my spending habits over the years.

When I calculated up 12 months at one point, a few years back, I was actually spending almost $300 a month on "guilt gifts" (things I could not really afford but "all" the kids friends had). I let them start working around the house for money to buy them and suddenly they were not so important. ::

Add that to my morning Java treat and I had a car payment!

Yes, I make a bit less working for myself, but it allows me time to be a pivotal part of this family...soo.:confused: Holidays were my worst vice, I had to start thinking out of the box.

1. This year, I had my kids pick out their Halloween costumes last November on sale.

2. I am almost done Christmas Shopping since I started that last January.

3. I already have Easter Baskets and fillings (excluding candy) in the attic ready to go from the day after sale .

4. The kids Birthday gifts are ready to go. I also loaded a few gift cards to add to the cards.

5. I have about 3 years worth of Mothers/Fathers days gifts ready to go..

Etc. :: It is the only way I live up to my own expectations on special occasions without breaking the bank for the next 2 years.


Oh, and for credit card debt, this was a huge help. It cut down my own plan by 3 years. I will be done completely by the end of next summer. Be sure to put in all cards. It is awesome and free!!

http://cgi.money.cnn.com/tools/debtplanner/debtplanner.jsp

[Angelwings36]

I have a dcf that has two boys full time in my care. (i have posted about them here before). The boys are here for 11+ hours a day and eat every meal here with me.

Over the past few weeks, I have been struggeling with the parents. I am feeling very taken advatange of, disrespected, and just horrible.

I don't really have too many issues with the kids that I can't get over, but the parents are just pushing me to my limits. I have no option to term, as todays economy has put me in this bind.

I have been doing this job for almost 10 years and have NEVER felt like this before and I feel like just giving up. Trust me, if this family was here last year, I would have dropped them. But with business being so slow, I can't.

Daycare is a hard job and parents and kids come as a package deal. can't have one without the other.

How do you make it through times like this? How do I fix this problem and how do I move on....

What hours are the children in care for? 11 hours is a very long time for children to be in care. This family expecting you to feed the children all 3 meals is also too much! I would forsure at least cut down on the super meal. Tell the family that you will no longer be providing supper. You could also have the family bring breakfast so all you have to do is serve it to the children.

[daycare]

I understand that feeling... I have had to really look at my spending habits over the years.

When I calculated up 12 months at one point, a few years back, I was actually spending almost $300 a month on "guilt gifts" (things I could not really afford but "all" the kids friends had). I let them start working around the house for money to buy them and suddenly they were not so important. ::

Add that to my morning Java treat and I had a car payment!

Yes, I make a bit less working for myself, but it allows me time to be a pivotal part of this family...soo.:confused: Holidays were my worst vice, I had to start thinking out of the box.

1. This year, I had my kids pick out their Halloween costumes last November on sale.

2. I am almost done Christmas Shopping since I started that last January.

3. I already have Easter Baskets and fillings (excluding candy) in the attic ready to go from the day after sale .

4. The kids Birthday gifts are ready to go. I also loaded a few gift cards to add to the cards.

5. I have about 3 years worth of Mothers/Fathers days gifts ready to go..

Etc. :: It is the only way I live up to my own expectations on special occasions without breaking the bank for the next 2 years.

I am so on board with the budget, just like you however Myhusband who comes from a very wealthy family has no idea what the word budget means. He has allowed me to cut back on just about every area and understands....ALL except one.. HIs car... the car that cost us a fortune.... But he says he refuses to sell it and it's really the only thing he got to keep. I made him rid of everything else..

Even if I cut off everything that we have, and lost this client, we could not survive... I fell like this client has me by the walnuts....... sorry...

No kid day today.....I am printing fliers to go advertise!!

[daycare]

What hours are the children in care for? 11 hours is a very long time for children to be in care. This family expecting you to feed the children all 3 meals is also too much! I would forsure at least cut down on the super meal. Tell the family that you will no longer be providing supper. You could also have the family bring breakfast so all you have to do is serve it to the children.

Cuttin out dinner was not an option becuase of how late they are here, but i did try to cut out breakfast and the parent said that they can't change their schedule. They said it would be way to hard for them...... So right now I am thinking of a way that I can make this work out and keep them... this is the type of family that if I say NO to one thing will pull thier kids.....and I have had spots open for several months without any hope of filling.....

[laundrymom]

What hours are they there?

[daycare]

What hours are they there?

7-7 m to f

[daycare]

7-7 m to f

Oops sorry I'm on my phone 8am 7pm daily

[littlemissmuffet]

Get out there and start adevrtising...every free moment you have. I know it's hard, with the hours you are working right now - but you NEED to replace this family - they are making you miserable, and you're working too long of days!

Halloween is coming, print off some business cards and put them in every single trick-or-treaters bag with their candy! Print off flyers and leave them at all the schools in your town, all the salons, convenience stores, grocery stores, everywhere. Bring business cards with you EVERYWHERE - when you see parents with kids at the park, grocery store, mall, anywhere - hand them out! Start talking to EVERYONE you see that has a child. Have ALL of your former and current clients WRITE up refrence letters for you - keep them on file, and write on every single CL ad, flyer, business card, daycare sign that you have excellent refrences. Start calling other local daycares and ask if they have a list of people they are willing to refer from their waiting list - DO IT, you never know! Contact fromer clients that you are looking to fill spaces and you'd appreciate them handing out business card or using word of mouth at their work places and family functions... do the same with current clients. Offer current clients a certain amount of money off if they get you a referal that stays for at least 6 months! The economy is bad, I know, but people are still having kids and still going to work... someone has to watch these kids - and you have to ensure it's YOU!

Good luck, daycare! It's tough when we start resenting and disliking our jobs because of a bad seed, be it a parent or a child... it's not fair to us, our families or our other daycare kids... keep searching for a replacement and make that your priority!

[littlemissmuffet]

Some more handy advertising tips...

Get daycare tshirts made - large logo, and make sure your daycare name and phone number are in large print as well - where it every single time you leave the house to run errands, get groceries, pay bills, etc. Make yourself a walking ad Get bumper stickers printed or window decals for your car - daycare name, logi, email and phone number. Lawn signs. If your town allows, make posters for lamp posts, telephone poles, etc. Leave posters and flyers at community centers, gyms and MEDICAL CENTERS (ped offices). If you have a website, post a link to it everywhere you can without spamming!

[MN Mom]

Honestly..I'd cut out dinner then. Push your family dinner to 7:30 ish if you have to. Give the kids a light snack at 4 and be done with it. The parents cannot and should not expect 3 meals a day out of you.

[Unregistered]

What are some of the issues your having with the parents? Its easy to give you advice b/c Im not walking in your shoes but Im here to tell you that through the years I have really had to grow a back bone and enforce the rules set forth by my contract. Its your buisness and your home. They need to respect you and your policies. We have opened our homes to these parents hoping that they wont be complete baphoons. Once they start taking advantage its time to reign them in. Hang in there!

[daycare]

Actually it's 3 meals and two snacks.
I can't push the time up because I'm on the food program.