Naptime Troubles! Please Help!

[mango]

Hello,

I have a 3 year old boy who takes a 45 minute nap, needs to be awake before 1:30 so that he can go to bed around 7:40 and wake up around 5:30 (This is his normal schedule).

The daycare that he's going to is letting him sleep over an hour, and wake up after 1:30. We've had several conversations about it, but it continues to happen. He is not going to bed around 8pm and waking up at 2-4am due to the long day naps.

I live in Oregon and my son goes to a registered in-home daycare. What should I do?

Thank you so much!

[nanglgrl]

Your child is not getting enough sleep for his age. He is probably exhausted come nap time and should sleep for at least 2 hours. Your bedtime troubles are probably caused by him being over exhausted and wanting face time with you. What time do you pick him up from daycare? What does your daycare have to say about this? A lot of states mandate that children have a certain amount of quiet time. A lot of providers do not accept children that don't nap. What kind of bedtime routine do you have? What do you do when he gets out of bed?

[Heidi]

If he is waking up at 2-4 am, it is not due to long naps.

He needs to be told "It's still night time, go back to bed" once, led back to bed. After that, he needs to be led back to bed without a single word EVERY SINGLE TIME. No fanfare, no arguing, nothing...just right back to bed. If you have a spouse, alternate the duty. Agree on it ahead of time, prepare yourself for a couple long nights, and stick to it. Caving even once will undo all your hard work, so don't cave!

This fairly typical testing behavior for 3 year olds.

You might want to establish a routine for when it IS time to wake up. I recommend a clock radio. Set it to the time you want him up, and tell him he can get up when it plays music. He will soon learn that unless that radio is playing, he should still be in bed.


As for your daycare; can you imagine throwing a birthday party by yourself for 8 children? That's a little what daycare is like. Now, do it again and again. Now...make sure at least half the children don't get naps because their parents think they've outgrown them. So, you have to try to keep those 3-4 kiddos awake, happy, and QUIET while the others sleep. Sounds like a blast, eh?

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Hello,

I have a 3 year old boy who takes a 45 minute nap, needs to be awake before 1:30 so that he can go to bed around 7:40 and wake up around 5:30 (This is his normal schedule).

The daycare that he's going to is letting him sleep over an hour, and wake up after 1:30. We've had several conversations about it, but it continues to happen. He is not going to bed around 8pm and waking up at 2-4am due to the long day naps.

I live in Oregon and my son goes to a registered in-home daycare. What should I do?

Thank you so much!

I would need a little more info to help you, like what time does he get to daycare, how long is he there, does he need to get up at 5:30, ect...?
As of right now, a 45 minute nap is not good enough and I would suggest he nap from 1-3 pm, then down for bed at 8. Lots of exercise at night and a great routine will help get him to bed by 8 and then he has a good 9.5 hours of sleep at night, plus 2+ hr nap, which puts him in a great spot for the amount of sleep he needs at his age. Less sleep during the day does not lead to better sleep at night in most cases. Usually the opposite. I would aim for a solid 12 hours of sleep per day, whether that is 10 hours at night and two for a nap, or 3-4 at nap and 8-9 at night.

Ultimately, if you don't like how the daycare does naps, you need to find a daycare that allows for your child to have a short nap. Most daycares will not wake a child if they fall asleep until rest is over. I would never wake a child after 45 minutes, no matter what age. Or an adult for that matter. It is a terrible part of the sleep cycle and generally leads to a crankier, more tired child than if they had no nap at all, imo.

[Unregistered]

If he is waking up at 2-4 am, it is not due to long naps.

He needs to be told "It's still night time, go back to bed" once, led back to bed. After that, he needs to be led back to bed without a single word EVERY SINGLE TIME. No fanfare, no arguing, nothing...just right back to bed. If you have a spouse, alternate the duty. Agree on it ahead of time, prepare yourself for a couple long nights, and stick to it. Caving even once will undo all your hard work, so don't cave!

This fairly typical testing behavior for 3 year olds.

You might want to establish a routine for when it IS time to wake up. I recommend a clock radio. Set it to the time you want him up, and tell him he can get up when it plays music. He will soon learn that unless that radio is playing, he should still be in bed.


As for your daycare; can you imagine throwing a birthday party by yourself for 8 children? That's a little what daycare is like. Now, do it again and again. Now...make sure at least half the children don't get naps because their parents think they've outgrown them. So, you have to try to keep those 3-4 kiddos awake, happy, and QUIET while the others sleep. Sounds like a blast, eh?

Yes and if your child sleeps before everyone else does then he wakes up and probably wakes the rest of them up or some of them up. Then there parents are angry at you that you didn't get their kid enough sleep. Everyone has to be on the same schedule otherwise chaos breaks loose. Otherwise he has to lay there quietly and he probably will A-fall back alseep if he's still tired or B-want to play and be loud. And if a baby cries everyone wakes up. Fun fun nap time is. Hard to keep every parent and child happy. If the kids dont' sleep enough they are crabby and then that crabbiness makes all the rest of the kids crabby so it's a crying domino effect.