Dirty Siblings Being Dropped Off?

[dayhomelady]

Hi there everyone!

I have a family that brings 2 children to my dayhome. They are 3 and 6.5. I've had these kids for over a year and bathing the kids hasn't always been high on the parents priority list it seems, but it's rapidly declining. The oldest one told me that they only have baths on Tuesdays and Fridays, but only then if they're really dirty. We are playing outside pretty much ALL day long.....at the park, digging in the sand, walking the dog, gardening........so they get quite dirty. When I change the younger ones diaper and take off the used diaper, this strong odor of "unwashed" body just eminates off the poor kid. Sometimes when it's been too rainy to go outside all day and we are indoors the whole time, my house just reeks of this gross smell of general uncleanliness. It's overwhelming to me sometimes. I bathe my child daily and I know that some people bathe their kids every other day and that's fine too. How do I gently approach this with the parents? I don't want to come across as a hag but I know that there have been entire weeks where they have not been bathed.

[Michael]

Welcome to the Daycare.com Forum! Do you have a parent handbook that stipulates cleanliness?

Some earlier threads that might help: https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=filthy

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=dirty+cloths

[nannyde]

It really doesn't matter how you approach it. There's no gentle way to tell a parent their kid is dirty and smells bad.

The ONLY way to do it is to bathe them yourself or bite the bullet and tell them the truth.

You need to just tell them you need to visit with them about something and it's a hard discussion but you must do it.

Tell them that you require kids to come clean every day and have fresh clothes. This means that they need to be bathed daily in the summer and at least every other day in the winter. They need to have clothing that is completely clean when they come to child care. The clothing must fit properly and not be difficult for you or the child to manage.

You have to talk THAT specificially.

You can say it nicely... you can use a sweet and concerned tone... you can have soft facial expressions... but in the end the parent is going to hear: you think my kid is dirty and stinks.

So just take the plunge and tell her the truth. You can throw in something like you are very sensitive to smells and have been your whole life. It's not personal but you can't take much of a body odor smell. Tell them that you have to bathe your kids every day or even THEY bother you... because you are so sensitive.

You can say that it's not personal... that you were born with this sensitivity and have been like that since YOU were a kid... your brothers even bothered you when you grew up...

something like that.

But be prepared for them to be pissed because they don't want to do the work of keeping them clean. You would have to be very low functioning to NOT see when a kid is dirty and smell when they have a bad odor. They KNOW it but it's okay by them because it is easier to not bathe them and keep them in fresh laundry.