Sick Kid, Mom Not Working

[WDW]

Maybe I'm just being crabby but I am so frustrated. I have five families that I provide care for. Two of them keep their kids home when they are home and such, the other kids are NEVER gone. Open to close, whether or not parents are working. So today, DCM is home AGAIN and brings DCG, age 15 months. Imagine how a 15 month old is in to EVERYTHING... and then take it x3 for this kid. Anyway, around 12:30, DCG throws up EVERYWHERE. I call mom, and she says "Do I have to come get her?" I said yes. She said, "well how soon, I wanted to run to Target" (Target is about 40 min each way). I told her she needed to come get DCG now. She said she probably just gagged herself, blah blah blah and comes to get her. Around 3:30 I get a text that says DCG is puking again. GRRRRR. Is it wrong that I'm going to be SO mad if anyone in my family gets sick!?! I have no doubt mom didn't know she was sick this morning.. she couldn't have known... but her kid shouldn't have been here when she wasn't working anyway.

[Unregistered]

no mom

I am not a mom. But just because the mom is home does not mean she has nothing to do. Parents have things to do and they dont want there children around. She is paying you to watch her kid not to judge her becuase she wants the day to herself. Some days people just need some alone time. Also they dont want 15 hands sticking out of the cart trying to shop and get things done. You should not be mad if she really did not no that the child was sick.

[wdmmom]

I couldn't agree more! Unfortunately most parents see them paying daycare as another bill so they want to get as much use out of it. Especially if it's a flat rate.

The best thing you can do (if you haven't already) is tell parents they have ___ minutes to pick up their sick child. Anything beyond that is $1.00 per minute.

AND

Add a clause in there that if the home is damaged, requires extensive cleaning due to a child throwing up or taking a diaper off and smearing it or whatever it might be, the rate is $20.00 in addition to any outsourcing necessary. Meaning, if you have a DCK vomit and you can't get the stain out of the carpet, make the parents responsible for a percentage of having it professionally cleaned or replacing. This goes for mishandling toys, etc.

[WDW]

I couldn't agree more! Unfortunately most parents see them paying daycare as another bill so they want to get as much use out of it. Especially if it's a flat rate.

The best thing you can do (if you haven't already) is tell parents they have ___ minutes to pick up their sick child. Anything beyond that is $1.00 per minute.

AND

Add a clause in there that if the home is damaged, requires extensive cleaning due to a child throwing up or taking a diaper off and smearing it or whatever it might be, the rate is $20.00 in addition to any outsourcing necessary. Meaning, if you have a DCK vomit and you can't get the stain out of the carpet, make the parents responsible for a percentage of having it professionally cleaned or replacing. This goes for mishandling toys, etc.

Oh, I agree. The $2 something an hr I get paid by them is worth more than time with the kid. Grrr. I am frustrated tonight, I had this happen and I also had another mom tell me AFTER daycare that DCB had thrown up before she came. She was fine all day, but !!! I do have a damage policy that says the are responsible for clean up/repair/replace but I need to re-word it. I realize a 15 mo old can't help if/when/where she gets sick, but this same DCG has smeared a dirty diaper twice. So, how do you say at her age that's intentional. Well, it wasn't an accident. She's a baby and doesn't know better. Where's the line?

Thankfully, today was pretty contained to things that can be thrown in the washer and/or wiped down with bleach. But still. Thanks for understanding. That in itself helps!

[NavyWife]

I honestly don't think I could ever charge someone damages if their child threw up on my carpet, couch or wherever. Throwing up is something that a child can't control, especially a 15 month old. As far as smearing a diaper, most kids do that at some point or another. I look at it like this, I'm the one who decided to do daycare, I know there's a chance that one of the kids could puke, poop, pee whatever on my carpet or couch and I still want to do daycare. Therefore, I should accept the responsibility of getting things cleaned. As far as things getting broken, I've actually had this happen. A dcb got one of DH's $60 video games and stepped on it and cracked it. Did I tell his mom she had to replace it? No. He did it while under my supervision, so I took responsibility and replaced it. As a parent, I would be very upset if I was asked to replace or pay to clean something my child had broke or damaged at daycare. I think that is the responsibility of the daycare provider.

Also, if parents are paying a flat rate weekly, by all means, bring them while you're home doing whatever. I know that we all need a break sometimes. As long as I'm getting paid, I don't care if they're home sitting watching soaps!

[wdmmom]

Most parents in this day and age don't spend enough waking hours with their children as it is. Parents today think they are "owed" something. They don't want to be around their kids anymore than they have to. If they take a vacation day at work, they take a vacation day from their kid too. That's not the way it should be. It really saddens me that some of my DCP's only spend 2-3 waking hours with their child during the week! SAD!!! When parents chose to reproduce, they chose to be a parent. THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU GET A BREAK! Once you made the choice to bear child, you continue to care for, nurture, teach, etc. that child for the rest of your life.

Too many parents today rely on daycare providers, teachers, and grandparents to parent THEIR child! Sad, sad, sad!

As for taking responsibility for a broken game...the child probably shouldn't have been around it anyway. If I had a child that purposely took off their diaper and smeared feces all over a pack and play, wall, etc, you bet the parents would be paying me additional fees for cleaning, possibly new equipment, paint, etc.

When parents selected me to provide care for their child, they did so based on experience and my home. I live in a quarter of a million dollar house in a very nice neighborhood. I'm not about to let anyone ruin the home I worked my tail off. I spend thousands and thousands of dollars upgrading my home and adding to my daycare. Parents are made aware through the contract that certain instances will be forgiven but they will be held responsible for toys that are misused or property that is damaged.

A year ago I had a DCB (4.5) sitting in time out and kept banging his head on the wall. I told him to knock it off. The picture several feet away fell off the wall and shattered. Luckily no one was injured from the glass but I did make the parent pay the cost to repair the frame and replace the glass ($24). After holding the parents responsible for their child's actions, and him getting punished at home for what he did, he was much more careful from that point on.

Each provider runs their daycare differently. The matter at hand is parents that bring their child to daycare ill and then don't want to pick them up. That in itself should be considered neglect. Parents today need to step up to the plate and take responsibility for the life (lives) they put on earth. If your child is sick, take off work or get off your duff and take them home and care for them. That is your job as a parent, not ours as a childcare provider.

[WDW]

I am not a mom. But just because the mom is home does not mean she has nothing to do. Parents have things to do and they dont want there children around. She is paying you to watch her kid not to judge her becuase she wants the day to herself. Some days people just need some alone time. Also they dont want 15 hands sticking out of the cart trying to shop and get things done. You should not be mad if she really did not no that the child was sick.

I am not saying people can NEVER take a day without their children. This particular Mom NEVER doesn't bring her child. She's home one, sometimes two days a week and the kid is always here, and is shipped off on weekends. Yes, I am being paid, but it's just sad to me.

I became a daycare provider so I could be the one taking care of my son. I am the first to admit it's nice when a kid is gone for a day or two. I would never wish a kid was sick, but why have kids if you aren't going to spend ANY time with them?!

[busymomof2]

I don't mind if parents want to drop off their kids with me on their day off. As long as they are honest about it. It's sad for the child and the parents are the ones who lose out on quality time with their kid.

As for sending kids sick, I just went through that last week. My daughter out of the blue threw up. After the second time, I called all the parents to warm them so if they don't want to bring their child to get sick at my house. One child shows up anyways and the child tells me that he has been throwing up and having diaherra for the past 4 days. The parents never told me and still brought their child each day. He could have vomitted at my house! I was not put on alert or isolated him or anything. As a result myself, my daughter and my baby son all got the same thing. THAT PISSES ME OFF. That is soooo selfish. I know they didn't tell me because they know I would not have let him attend. But there is a good reason for that...we will all get sick!

[MsMe]

I am not saying people can NEVER take a day without their children. This particular Mom NEVER doesn't bring her child. She's home one, sometimes two days a week and the kid is always here, and is shipped off on weekends. Yes, I am being paid, but it's just sad to me.

I became a daycare provider so I could be the one taking care of my son. I am the first to admit it's nice when a kid is gone for a day or two. I would never wish a kid was sick, but why have kids if you aren't going to spend ANY time with them?!

I have a family like this too. It greatly effects the children. Parents like this really bother me. I have spent the last couple of years trying to realize that it is none of my business....but I can't. It drives me nuts, dissipoints me, and makes me terribly sad for the children.

[morgan24]

I am not a mom. But just because the mom is home does not mean she has nothing to do. Parents have things to do and they dont want there children around. She is paying you to watch her kid not to judge her becuase she wants the day to herself. Some days people just need some alone time. Also they dont want 15 hands sticking out of the cart trying to shop and get things done. You should not be mad if she really did not no that the child was sick.

I agree that I am being paid to watch children, any judging I do is for free. Until parents start putting their children above money in the daycare situation this is the type of mentality providers are going to have to deal with. In this situation the parent objecting to coming and picking up her sick child because she wants to go to Target would make me judge her and I would. Parents should pull their heads out of the sand and teach their kids how to behave at the store so they can take them and get things done and spend time with them, which we all know makes for happier children.

[DBug]

I just don't understand how parents can KNOW their child is sick, and not want to be with them.

When I'm sick, I would rather be home in my own bed and be able to relax with no schedule or expectations. If one of my kids gets sick at school, I get them picked up asap (usually by my husband), because the idea of them curled up on a hard chair at the principal's office, or throwing up in the public bathroom just breaks my heart.

I just don't understand the parenting mindset that doesn't feel that way .

[MsMe]

I am not a mom. But just because the mom is home does not mean she has nothing to do. Parents have things to do and they dont want there children around. She is paying you to watch her kid not to judge her becuase she wants the day to herself. Some days people just need some alone time. Also they dont want 15 hands sticking out of the cart trying to shop and get things done. You should not be mad if she really did not no that the child was sick.

Once you have a child(ren) you no longer have the 'right' to go to the store alone.

Yes, you can pay someone to watch your children so you can go to the store, watch t.v., pick your nose.....but the one really paying is your child not your pocket book.

Teach kids how to act in public and you can take them anywhere and have a great time.

[Gurdy]

Once you have a child(ren) you no longer have the 'right' to go to the store alone.

Yes, you can pay someone to watch your children so you can go to the store, watch t.v., pick your nose.....but the one really paying is your child not your pocket book.

Teach kids how to act in public and you can take them anywhere and have a great time.

I absolutely agree with what you have said here!!
I do not understand providers that say that they do not care what parents are doing as long as they are getting paid! I care!! I also do not understand the comment that the missed time with their children is the parents loss-- it is the child's loss.

[WDW]

I absolutely agree with what you have said here!!
I do not understand providers that say that they do not care what parents are doing as long as they are getting paid! I care!! I also do not understand the comment that the missed time with their children is the parents loss-- it is the child's loss.

Yes! It's both really, but yes! I care too. I am thinking strongly about implementing a policy that I will only watch kids when the parents are working. I know some who do it, of course I have to be willing to not be paid when they're not... and I'm not sure I can afford that right now.

[morgan24]

I absolutely agree with what you have said here!!
I do not understand providers that say that they do not care what parents are doing as long as they are getting paid! I care!! I also do not understand the comment that the missed time with their children is the parents loss-- it is the child's loss.

I do care but, I can't make parents care, I can't make them care about the effect it's having on their child, I can't force them to spend their day off with their child. So I do care for their child when they take a day off, I just want to know how to reach them if needed. It's not about the money, I had to face the fact that parents really don't care how their child feels, they still are going to do whatever on their days off without their child. I guess the biggest reason I do it is for the child.