What About The Child Who Simply DOESN'T WANT TO GO POTTY?!?

[grandmom]

There are two battles you will never win.

What goes in their mouth.
When it comes out.

Lifelong toileting issues are sometimes the result of forced toileting. It is not worth the fight when you think about the lifelong issues.

He will use the toilet before he goes to 1st grade.

[misol]

He will use the toilet before he goes to 1st grade.

They used to say before kindergarten. Soon they will be saying before 5th grade.

[laundrymom]

I always say prom. Lol they will be potty learned before prom. I promise.

[SandeeAR]

I feel your pain. I have a VERY smart 2.5 y/o that refuses to go too. She knows what to do, when to do it and all that, put WON'T do it.

Parents have tried, pull ups and panties. I have used training pants doubled up with plastic pants, but will not use panties until they are TOTALLY trained. The day she peed thru a diaper and soaked my sofa, was the last day she was on my sofa until she has been totally trained for awhile!

She could care less if she is wet or dirty. I won't take her every hour. When she is ready, she will tell me. She is the one getting trained, not me. For now we are in diapers totally again.

[Cat Herder]

I always say prom. Lol they will be potty learned before prom. I promise.

This morning I told a dad that his son is only 22 months, that he would not be walking down the aisle in a diaper, and we should pick a better battle...like his constant spitting in the floor

Dad turned 3 shades of red and walked away laughing and shaking his head (he is the dipper; smokeless tobacco) :::: Busted

[ninosqueridos]

If he HAS peed in the potty before then he CAN use the potty there is NO MORE EXCUSES. Take him potty EVERY hour and have him sit for 5 minutes then give him LOTS of postive praise such as clapping, jumping up and down, and saying good job _______ you are such a big boy. When he goes in his pants tell him big boys dont pee or poop there pants they go pee and poop in the potty. If he is VERY smart as stated and 3 he can SURELY use the potty and why are the parents even giving him a choice.

I took him every hour for over 9 months and that didn't work (still wets whenever; most of the time refuses to sit/cries). What's the point of "catching him" before he pees if he's never going to tell me, kwim? Abundant praise doesn't work - he is on the shy/reserved side so I think the praise turned him off actually. Oy.

I would talk to the parents and see if they would be open to setting up a plan so that you're both on the same page. It sounds like they are being inconsistent (saying they are taking a break and then still telling him to sit on the potty) and are trying to force the issue, which will only make him resist more. Do you think they'd be open to something like that?

At this point, I don't think they want me to do anything differently. They know I will encourage, but not force the issue. I'm just trying to figure out if there's anything else I can do or suggest to them. If they want to try and force it, it's their decision as parents, no? IDK. *sigh*

could it be he doesn't like the toilet seat or the potty. I have some who use the toilet seat some who use the potty. Also, how about leaving him in underwear instead of pullups or diapers. Also, let him see the other kids use the bathroom maybe that might help.

Two days out of the blue, he showed up in underwear - after 2 puddles, he was back in pullups/diapers. I told them he needs to be able to tell me when he wants to go before he could go in underwear.

He has no problem sitting in a dirty diaper.

DCB doesn't either.

If he were here it would be a non-issue because I don't potty train.

Potty training is a parental responsibility.

I stopped the potty drama years ago.

When a child asks to go, I take them. I have no problem wiping them if they did not get as clean as I would like. There is no pressure and NEVER tears.

When a parent asks me to assist I tell them I will ask the child, up to once an hour, if they need to go. If they say "Yes" I will take them. Again, No pressure and no tears.

I do not allow pressure at mealtimes or at potty times. My house is a pretty relaxed place where the kids are comfortable.

If you present it to the parents from that perspective, they seem to appreciate it. They are being hit up with all the "my kids is better because he trained at 2 months!!" BS.

I remember a video someone once posted with the two moms going back and forth like that when another provider here was having similar issues...it was hilarious!!! Does anyone have a link???? I think it was youtube?

I love this drama-free, tear-free method. That's why I stopped forcing the issue. I hate the way potty training is somehow an intelligence factor. I think the parents are feeling pressure from other parents of "genius young toddlers" who were in underwear at 2 or younger.

I always say prom. Lol they will be potty learned before prom. I promise.

::::

This morning I told a dad that his son is only 22 months, that he would not be walking down the aisle in a diaper, and we should pick a better battle...like his constant spitting in the floor

Dad turned 3 shades of red and walked away laughing and shaking his head (he is the dipper; smokeless tobacco) :::: Busted

:::: and ewww...


THANKS EVERYONE