What Would You Do?

[tenderhearts]

Dcb is almost 3 yrs. He has been with me since he was an infant. He has always had sleep issues since he was a baby. However, when he was about 22 mo I moved him from a pack n play to a floor mat with the other kids and he has actually since that time has been a great sleeper. NO issues, what so ever until this week. So that has been a little over a year with no problems.

All of a sudden literally 45 min into his nap he is waking up crying and whining loudly which is waking up the other kids. He will not lay there quietly. I have tried to go in cover him and tell him it's still nap time but as soon as I walk out he starts crying loudly or banging on the door. Normally if he woke up and layed there quietly I would simply bring him out and he could finish quiet time with the other kids however, he knows he is being loud so therefore I have been removing him and placing him in a different room until quiet time is over.
He is NOT ready to give up his naps, he wakes up between 4:30am and 5:30am each morning. He is a walking zombie by 10:30. Nothing has changed here as far as schedule eating daily activities.

Would you just start him in a separate room from now on? I know at home he wakes shortly after going to bed and cries and goes into his parents bed, they tried months ago to break this but said they feel it was "traumatizing" him too much so they weren't going to do it, but this has been months ago and it never has affected him sleeping here.

Or would you just leave him up and let him stay up and watch the movie which he will most likely fall asleep?

[hwichlaz]

I'd put him in another room.

[trix23]

My child at about 3 years old would only nap if he was exhausted.

I would nap him in a separate room from the other kids and separate from noise transference. I would put him down for nap LAST and have an activity for myself to do in the same room while sitting on the couch (paperwork, training, reading, checking emails, etc) with the child in sight. If you use a nap mat or cot and he gets up, simply take him back to his "bed" and say "(name), it's naptime. I'll tuck you in. Goodnight." Then go sit down. Do it the same exact way each time until he stays put.

If he hears the same exact thing and doesn't get what he wants (attention, to stay up, etc) then he will give in and stay put. It might take 8-15 times so be ready!

[tenderhearts]

That's the problem, he's fine if I am sitting next to him. I think because that's what he does in the middle of the night, wakes goes in mommy and daddy's bed if I sit there the whole time he'll be fine. He's almost 3, why now? I know that if I put him in a different room, he will start screaming and crying, and bang on the door, in which will keep everyone else up and annoy the heck out of the rest of my family.

[trix23]

Could be a lot of things, but do what I suggested and sit on a chair further and further away each day. If he bangs on the door, tell him "You're not allowed to do that to the door. It's naptime. Let's lay down."

[CalCare]

Okay, here's my guess (to the "But why now?): maybe Mommy is pregnant. I swear these things always turn out to be Mommy is pregnant! That or some other major change that no one is realizing. So, the parents are behaving differently... Just a guess

[Ariana]

In my experience 3 is when kids start getting nightmares and fears. More night wakeups etc. I agree though that this has never affected daycare sleep here but maybe the sheer overtiredness is causing him to wake before going into deep sleep?

There is clearly something different going on at home. Is a parent going into his bed with him? Could you put him back in a pack n play until he learns he cannot get up? I had to do this with a child once. Her home life is a wreck and it was the only way to sleep train her here.

[daycare]

If he is going in to the parents room is he co-sleeping with him??

I always find kids who co-sleep with parents never nap well here at DC. they need that constant contact of a body next to them or they wake up and don't sleep.

I have a just turned 2 year old that naps for 15 min a day. it has been you know what the last two weeks.

[Blackcat31]

The biggest issue I see with this is the parents have outright told you they are not willing to try and correct this behavior at home.

I know nap time is not bed time but its still a sleep routine and if the parents are doing one thing to reinforce that it's okay that he get up and move to an adult, then you are forever going to be fighting that. I know not all kids have issues with X being done at home and Y being done at daycare but clearly this child DOES have issues because of it.

I would let the parents know that if they do not start working on it at home, you will have to call for pick up if he becomes disruptive during nap time for the other kids.

It'd be one thign if the child was under age 2 but being 3 yrs old, this should be something he can easily understand.

[trix23]

Def agree with BlackCat!

[daycarediva]

In my experience 3 is when kids start getting nightmares and fears. More night wakeups etc. I agree though that this has never affected daycare sleep here but maybe the sheer overtiredness is causing him to wake before going into deep sleep?

There is clearly something different going on at home. Is a parent going into his bed with him? Could you put him back in a pack n play until he learns he cannot get up? I had to do this with a child once. Her home life is a wreck and it was the only way to sleep train her here.

Was just going to say this. I have a 3yo afraid of sleeping at all due to nightmares. I reassure, give hugs, pat his back, but he goes back down on his mat. I'm not setting up bad habits.

If he is going in to the parents room is he co-sleeping with him??

I always find kids who co-sleep with parents never nap well here at DC. they need that constant contact of a body next to them or they wake up and don't sleep.

I have a just turned 2 year old that naps for 15 min a day. it has been you know what the last two weeks.

Yup! Never works!

The biggest issue I see with this is the parents have outright told you they are not willing to try and correct this behavior at home.

I know nap time is not bed time but its still a sleep routine and if the parents are doing one thing to reinforce that it's okay that he get up and move to an adult, then you are forever going to be fighting that. I know not all kids have issues with X being done at home and Y being done at daycare but clearly this child DOES have issues because of it.

I would let the parents know that if they do not start working on it at home, you will have to call for pick up if he becomes disruptive during nap time for the other kids.

It'd be one thign if the child was under age 2 but being 3 yrs old, this should be something he can easily understand.

YES!