Kids Changing?

[Blackcat31]

I see it as an issue with not being allowed.... like Diva said, the fixation on not allowing any type of good/bad play is what fosters their incessant need to want to play.

Its human nature to want what you can't have.

The rest I chalk up to the everyone is a winner mentality and the silly concept that everyone has to be friends.

Nice, courteous and polite? Yes.
Friends? Not necessary.

Couple all that with the fact that parent's seem to feel that a measure of their parenting skills is directly related to IF and HOW MUCH their child likes them.

I don't think my parent's gave a rat's patootie if I "liked" them or not. That wasn't even listed in their job description. I never once thought I didn't love them nor did I consider for a second that they didn't love me. It simply didn't work that way.

Like was something reserved for broccoli. ::

[Blackcat31]

Oh and in regards to video games..... my son is currently on the Dean's list at his college and has been asked to help student teach in one of his classes because of his eye for detail and his understanding of how the CAD programs and machines work.

Thanks to all the late night hours he spent holed up in his room playing video games.

There IS a positive to video games.

Just like anything.... used appropriately and within reason...it can be a positive thing.

[Cat Herder]

I think the behavior issues are because children are rarely able to run and play until they choose to stop. They live overly scheduled and structured lives devoid of free choices, free will or the gift of boredom.

They spend too much time under adults thumb and strapped into confinement equipment (car seats, high chairs, restaurant booths, shopping carts, automobiles, fences, etc).

Every adult is willing to tell them what to think, say and do but few are willing to listen to what they really want for themselves. Kids today are simply frustrated, their lives are unnatural.

There is a youtube video on what it feels like to be talked to as a kid... I will see if I can find it.

I don't know any kid right now who has the ability to simply walk out their front door to play in their own neighborhood with other kids. Do you?

[Blackcat31]

I don't know any kid right now who has the ability to simply walk out their front door to play in their own neighborhood with other kids. Do you?

waving hand.....

Thankfully, my small town community tends to live very much like that still. My neighbor has 3 kids. The oldest is 10 and the youngest is Kindy age. All 3 of her kids walk home alone from school (several blocks) every day.

They spend all afternoon outside playing... even in the winter months. I see mom and/or dad rolling in after work about the time I am leaving daycare.

I am sure many would frown on their choices to allow their children to do that... but I don't. I absolutely see the value in what they are allowing their children to do.

[MissAnn]

About the video games.....
I had a child who was immersed in video games. He played them with big brother.....call of duty ghosts was his favorite. He was the most violent boy I've ever had. He was in a video game 90% of the day.....not actually in front of one playing it....but in his head. he had almost no real communication with kids here. He made video game noises all day long. He walked like Mario....all day long. I talked to mom who said she thought he was just creative. No, creative would be coming up with your own script to play.....not acting out video games all day long. I contacted a professional. She said....video games....kids needs to stop playing so many video games. She encouraged me to talk to mom again. The mom took away all video games and we noticed positive changes right away. By the time he left here I felt like I knew him. While he was a living video game I did not know him. I couldn't teach him....I couldn't even communicate properly with him.

So.....I'm not saying video games are all bad....but too much is extremely dangerous for our kids. Of course this boys case was extreme. He was playing games that were very violent and not for 4 year olds!

[Blackcat31]

About the video games.....
I had a child who was immersed in video games. He played them with big brother.....call of duty ghosts was his favorite. He was the most violent boy I've ever had. He was in a video game 90% of the day.....not actually in front of one playing it....but in his head. he had almost no real communication with kids here. He made video game noises all day long. He walked like Mario....all day long. I talked to mom who said she thought he was just creative. No, creative would be coming up with your own script to play.....not acting out video games all day long. I contacted a professional. She said....video games....kids needs to stop playing so many video games. She encouraged me to talk to mom again. The mom took away all video games and we noticed positive changes right away. By the time he left here I felt like I knew him. While he was a living video game I did not know him. I couldn't teach him....I couldn't even communicate properly with him.

So.....I'm not saying video games are all bad....but too much is extremely dangerous for our kids. Of course this boys case was extreme. He was playing games that were very violent and not for 4 year olds!

I can see how that is a bad situation but I still view that as more of a parenting issue than a video game issue.

[MissAnn]

I can see how that is a bad situation but I still view that as more of a parenting issue than a video game issue.

I think it's both. Parents should monitor screen time of any kind.....the amount of time and for age appropriateness.

Parents need to parent. Let kids experience risk, disappointment, conflict, and being told no.

I like this article. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...es-kids-brains It doesn't totally bash screen time but does suggest limiting it. Of course call of duty is never appropriate for young children!

[Blackcat31]

I think it's both. Parents should monitor screen time of any kind.....the amount of time and for age appropriateness.

Parents need to parent. Let kids experience risk, disappointment, conflict, and being told no.

I like this article. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...es-kids-brains It doesn't totally bash screen time but does suggest limiting it. Of course call of duty is never appropriate for young children!

Great article too!

[daycarediva]

Yes, video games (and ice cream) are fantastic in moderation.

My kids have limited screen time and age appropriate limits on type of games played. My younger boys (8 and 11) are currently obsessed with football. They play Madden together when they have screen time. When they aren't playing video games, they use figures and writes plays on paper, make up team names, player names, positions, stats, football cards, they even had a draft. When they play pretend games with the figures they adds up the scores. THAT is creative (and educational)

DS/8 put a stopwatch on his Christmas list so he can TIME his football games like they do in the NFL.

They also play pick up games in the yard with neighborhood kids and friends.

We have a family fantasy football team. They read articles on players and compare player stats to make educated guesses on who will get more points (this defense allowed the most rushing yards so that player might do better than another player going up against a defense that allowed the least amount of rushing yards)

DS/8 also has free writing daily in his journal at school. I'm sure his teacher is LOVING his insane football interest.