Fdr

**Blackcat31** · 08-18-2016, 06:28 AM

Originally posted by Unregistered

Currently have a dcb who has been here for 2 weeks. He does not want to interact with the other kids. His whole day-if given the choice-would be to lay on the couch and watch tv. When I insist he joins us in the playroom instead of laying in the living room, he spend the entire time with tears in his eyes and says to me "my mommy will be here soon" every 10 minutes. It has gotten no better. His previous DCP only had two kids so being couch potatoes was his basic day. Now his game is to say he doesn't feel well.
What would you do?

If I KNOW kids are playing the "I don't feel well" card as a manipulation tactic, I would absolutely believe him.

Kids that don't feel well go straight to nap/rest time. No TV of course because kids that don't feel well need to rest not only their bodies but their brains as well.

Then I would go do something SUPER fun with the other kids making sure to mention that you are sad DCB doesn't feel well because the rest of you are having so much fun.

I don't allow them to change their mind and decide they no longer feel under the weather (that gives them the power to waffle back and forth) instead I stick to the original words that child does not feel well. I make sure their day is as boring as possible.

Unless they are truly not feeling well, I rarely, if ever hear them use that tactic again.

This ^^ of course is for a child old enough to understand. I certainly wouldn't hold out for so long with a younger child that doesn't fully understand the ramifications of what they are saying. Straight to nap though is an awesome consequence for any child of any age that isn't feeling well and is simply trying to get out of having to do something else.

If you want to allow him to watch TV make him earn it. For every 30 minutes he spends actively (and without complaint) engaged in other activities such as running/playing outside, building in block area, playing with the other kids etc... allow him 15 minutes of a TV show.

Requiring him to do something to get something is a good lesson for a lot of areas of life. You know his currency or his motivator (the TV) so use it to your advantage and make him earn it by doing what you want/need him to do first.

**Cat Herder** · 08-18-2016, 08:29 AM

First, I was bummed this was not about Franklin Delano Roosevelt, as advertised....

Second, becoming a no tv household will stop this pretty quickly. Obviously, if the kid is indeed just overtired, having the "go rest" option may be exactly what his body needs. He may just be a slow joiner, as well.

**MunchkinWrangler** · 08-18-2016, 09:16 AM

Originally posted by Cat Herder

First, I was bummed this was not about Franklin Delano Roosevelt, as advertised....

Second, becoming a no tv household will stop this pretty quickly. Obviously, if the kid is indeed just overtired, having the "go rest" option may be exactly what his body needs. He may just be a slow joiner, as well.

Lol! Your first comment made my day!:

:

**childcaremom** · 08-18-2016, 09:23 AM

I had a little guy whose previous daycare was all tv all the time. I am completely screen free (which dcm said was what she liked about my set up).

It took him a long time (months) to learn to play well. He whined, moped, complained, etc. BCs suggestions are great. Be consistent and he will get there.

My little guy eventually got in a great groove and routine and then dcm upped his screen time at home and he went right back where he started.

He didn't last much longer after that.

**Rockgirl** · 08-18-2016, 09:38 AM

Originally posted by Cat Herder

First, I was bummed this was not about Franklin Delano Roosevelt, as advertised....

Second, becoming a no tv household will stop this pretty quickly. Obviously, if the kid is indeed just overtired, having the "go rest" option may be exactly what his body needs. He may just be a slow joiner, as well.

Glad I wasn't the only one who thought this was about Roosevelt!

**laundrymom** · 08-18-2016, 10:30 AM

I need coffee I guess

I can't figure out what fdr is for.

**Leigh** · 08-18-2016, 10:44 AM

I can identify. I have a 6 year old who started this week who wants to watch TV all day. Today, he curled up in a chair and cried loudly for 20 minutes because I wouldn't turn on a television for him. I just said "we're not watching TV today" and when he started crying, walked away and completely ignored him. After the cry was over, he got up and started playing and has done just fine.

**childcaremom** · 08-18-2016, 01:50 PM

Originally posted by laundrymom

I need coffee I guess

I can't figure out what fdr is for.

Me, either. And I have had my caffeine. :

:

I thought Roosevelt, too. I keep coming back hoping someone will clue me in.

**e.j.** · 08-18-2016, 02:59 PM

Originally posted by Unregistered

Currently have a dcb who has been here for 2 weeks. He does not want to interact with the other kids. His whole day-if given the choice-would be to lay on the couch and watch tv. When I insist he joins us in the playroom instead of laying in the living room, he spend the entire time with tears in his eyes and says to me "my mommy will be here soon" every 10 minutes. It has gotten no better. His previous DCP only had two kids so being couch potatoes was his basic day. Now his game is to say he doesn't feel well.
What would you do?

I would offer him a quiet place to rest.
Some kids become very anxious when it comes to new surroundings, people and experiences. They need time and space to adjust. I had one dcb who was this way. After 2 weeks of listening to him whine in a very shrill voice, "Mama soon?! Mama soon?!" all day long, every single day, I was ready to term. Out of sheer frustration one day, I told him nicely to stop. When he couldn't/wouldn't, I asked if he needed a nap. He took me up on it and seemed better when he woke up. The next morning, he came in, went right to his cot and rested while watching what was going on. It took about a week of him doing that and then all of a sudden, one day he walked in and just started playing with the other kids. He became one of my favorite dc kids.
Good luck! I hope things work out as well for you and your dcb.

**Cat Herder** · 08-19-2016, 08:23 AM

"Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Hmm... no tv.

"The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Let us move forward with strong and active faith."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Nope. No tv.

"It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Ironically applicable.

"Men are not prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own minds."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Again, ironically applicable.

"The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - It is starting to look like he was doing this on purpose.

"We cannot always build the future for our youth, but we can build our youth for the future."

Franklin D. Roosevelt -OK. Is it just me or was FDR a childcare provider in a former life. lovethis

**Mike** · 08-19-2016, 09:24 AM

Originally posted by Cat Herder

Is it just me or was FDR a childcare provider in a former life. lovethis

:

:
Probably

**MunchkinWrangler** · 08-19-2016, 10:41 AM

Originally posted by Cat Herder

"Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Hmm... no tv.

"The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Let us move forward with strong and active faith."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Nope. No tv.

"It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Ironically applicable.

"Men are not prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own minds."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - Again, ironically applicable.

"The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little."

Franklin D. Roosevelt - It is starting to look like he was doing this on purpose.

"We cannot always build the future for our youth, but we can build our youth for the future."

Franklin D. Roosevelt -OK. Is it just me or was FDR a childcare provider in a former life. lovethis

happyface. :

::

: I love the quotes but am laughing so hard right now!!

Fdr

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