Frustrated With 1 Year Old DCB

[Unregistered]

I have had this dcb since birth. Since he has turned 1, his behavior has gotten worse. He throws tantrums all day at being told no (no to taking toys away from other kids, no at playing with the baby gate, no at hitting, etc.). He throws himself on the floor, hits his face on the floor, screams and kicks. He won't eat very much lunch. He throws a fit every time I put him in the high chair.

It's beginning to be an all day, every day issue. I tell the mom every day of his behavior and started giving (and keeping a copy) of daily reports. Pretty much every time I tell the parents, I get a reply of "well, he didn't sleep well last night." Or, "Hopefully he'll get a good nights sleep tonight and be better tomorrow." Or my favorite recent one, "Well, it is what it is."

DCM says they put him in a 2 second time out in the high chair at home. I have started putting him in the pack and play in another room when he throws his fits. I'm afraid he's going to hurt himself when he throws himself down on the floor.

I am trying to find some way to work through this. I'm about ready to term, but how much of this is just 1 year old behavior and how much is this just how the child is going to be and it's never going to get better?

[Blackcat31]

What do the parents say in regards to how they discipline or parent at home?

Do they give in to his fits? Do they hold him a lot?

Are they consistent with their rules? Are you?

I do think a majority of it IS typical 1 yr old behavior but some of sounds like he may be doing what works....know what I mean?

If he tantrums to get what he wants and the parents (or you) give in to that tantrum ALL he learned was that it works. No matter how long he has to have that fit.

Providing an audience for a tantrum is also never a good idea and only reinforces the behavior.

If I were in your shoes, I would set up a plan for how you (and the parents) are going to manage certain behaviors. He needs consistent and IMMEDIATE consequences.

Whatever plan you and the parents come up with HAS to be done both at home and at daycare in order to achieve the most and fastest success.

If YOU do not see any improvements in his behavior in a 30 day period (or however long you agree to continue trying) then I would term.

When ONE child makes the day MORE miserable than happy, it's time to part ways.

HTH

[preschoolteacher]

Putting him in a TO in his high chair likely is why he throws a fit to sit there at meal time. I'd tell them that needs to stop.